Rooftops
Member
I feel really embarrassed that I'm posting this but I have nobody else to talk to about it. I'm in a bad spot emotionally as it is so this situation doesn't really help.
I've known my gay friend A for a couple of years through somebody else, but it's only recently that I've started seeing him outside of my usual friendship group. About a week ago I met his friend J for the first time and I really got on with her. We then went to her friend P's house.
As soon as I saw P I knew we were attracted to each other and we talked all night. Sadly I got the impression that P and J were an item as J mentioned that P gets jealous when she talks about her exes. I really liked him but pushed the idea to the back of my mind. Later A and I went home even though P wanted us to stay the night at his.
On Saturday A, J and I decided we would go on a night out. Out of nowhere P wanted to come too so we all went together. At one point J said that P didn't mind when she kissed other people in front of him, that she wanted to kiss someone that night to make him jealous. I found this really odd but didn't say anything. A also told me he wanted to get J and P together, I said "I thought they were already together?" and A replied, "Not exactly."
By now I was very confused and very drunk too. I was dancing with P when suddenly he leaned in to kiss me (whilst J was in the same room!) - I instantly freaked out and pushed him away. P panicked saying he wasn't coming onto me (even though he was). I then asked him if he was with someone and he told me that J and him were just sleeping together (ie. f**k buddies) and she didn't mind him kissing me. I guess I shouldn't of but I let him kiss me after that.
A quickly dragged me into the toilets with J as I apologised to her, saying I was a terrible person (I was worried P had lied to me). Surprisingly J said that it honestly didn't bother her and that P had asked her if he was allowed to kiss me in advance. Even more confused now, I simply gave up trying to work out the situation and made out with P for most of the night. P kept changing his mind back and forth, asking me to stay the night at his then taking it back saying he wouldn't sleep with me tonight (I don't do one night stands anyway). It was getting way too weird and I was feeling incredibly anxious.
In the end I felt so guilty that I told P he should be with J. He looked really offended and said, "I don't want to be with J." "I think J likes you more than I do," I continued (I have no idea why I said this) and P answered that he didn't want to be in a relationship with her. He seemed really confused and upset and went home with J. I don't know if they shared a taxi together or actually stayed the night with each other though.
I shared a taxi home with A and was so drunk that I threw up, cried uncontrollably and kept yelling that nobody wanted me. Ahem. Basically I have no idea what to do. I was thinking of telling A that I'm still hung up over P but I don't know if that would make the situation worse. I've only met P and J twice but I really don't want to lose them. Please help!
I've known my gay friend A for a couple of years through somebody else, but it's only recently that I've started seeing him outside of my usual friendship group. About a week ago I met his friend J for the first time and I really got on with her. We then went to her friend P's house.
As soon as I saw P I knew we were attracted to each other and we talked all night. Sadly I got the impression that P and J were an item as J mentioned that P gets jealous when she talks about her exes. I really liked him but pushed the idea to the back of my mind. Later A and I went home even though P wanted us to stay the night at his.
On Saturday A, J and I decided we would go on a night out. Out of nowhere P wanted to come too so we all went together. At one point J said that P didn't mind when she kissed other people in front of him, that she wanted to kiss someone that night to make him jealous. I found this really odd but didn't say anything. A also told me he wanted to get J and P together, I said "I thought they were already together?" and A replied, "Not exactly."
By now I was very confused and very drunk too. I was dancing with P when suddenly he leaned in to kiss me (whilst J was in the same room!) - I instantly freaked out and pushed him away. P panicked saying he wasn't coming onto me (even though he was). I then asked him if he was with someone and he told me that J and him were just sleeping together (ie. f**k buddies) and she didn't mind him kissing me. I guess I shouldn't of but I let him kiss me after that.
A quickly dragged me into the toilets with J as I apologised to her, saying I was a terrible person (I was worried P had lied to me). Surprisingly J said that it honestly didn't bother her and that P had asked her if he was allowed to kiss me in advance. Even more confused now, I simply gave up trying to work out the situation and made out with P for most of the night. P kept changing his mind back and forth, asking me to stay the night at his then taking it back saying he wouldn't sleep with me tonight (I don't do one night stands anyway). It was getting way too weird and I was feeling incredibly anxious.
In the end I felt so guilty that I told P he should be with J. He looked really offended and said, "I don't want to be with J." "I think J likes you more than I do," I continued (I have no idea why I said this) and P answered that he didn't want to be in a relationship with her. He seemed really confused and upset and went home with J. I don't know if they shared a taxi together or actually stayed the night with each other though.
I shared a taxi home with A and was so drunk that I threw up, cried uncontrollably and kept yelling that nobody wanted me. Ahem. Basically I have no idea what to do. I was thinking of telling A that I'm still hung up over P but I don't know if that would make the situation worse. I've only met P and J twice but I really don't want to lose them. Please help!
