Does anyone else get paranoia

[Confuseddd]

Well theres been a lot of times that i could be hanging out with friends and i start panicking and thinking that like if they start to laugh its something about me. Also if i dont really hear something they might have said then i also feel like it was about me. One time in particular i was at my bestfriends house around a fire, there was 6 of us and i started to really feel anxious and paranoid. I mean yeah i was smoking and drinking so i doubt that helped :/ but by the time everyone went home and it was just me and my friend i was having a full blown panic attack and he was trying to talk to me. all i remember really from when he was trying to talk to me was i have nothing to be ashamed about around him. We kinda avoid talking about it directly.. Anyways does that happen to any one else? i have been a lot better with that as of lately. It is embarassing and i feel like a retard because i cant function normally at all. I know i have trust issues. When i was younger my dad left me and i never had any one i could really lean onto for emotional support. My mom tried but no ones perfect and my brothers, well they were just being older brothers, You know , they would pick on me and all of that. I never had any issues until i turned 16 about and it started getting really bad. One of my old friends started to make fun of me CONSTANTLY when i started to have serious issues. I could never confront him about it though. So i hung out with him for awhile even though he would treat me horribly. I used to have alot of friends but now i barely go outside. I dont know what i should do though because i think that the reason i am feeling better lately is because i just avoid putting stress on myself. Work im kinda forced to deal with it but i dont have many issues at work really.


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jEGixKOMe78

 

[Going Insane]

Nope, you're not the only one... Every time I hear someone talking or laughing......

 

[Confuseddd]

alright, i wonder if thats apart of this whole SA thing... feeling like your alone because i felt that way for a very long time until i found this site a week or so ago.

 

[3lefts]

Oh my goodness, I can relate!
First of yes, paranoia like crazy but I deal. And you're right about the feeling good thing only because you're avoiding stressful situations. Sometimes it's been so long for me when I'm convinced I'm fine and then I'll get into a nerve-wracking situation and be completely unprepared. I'd completely tricked myself and forgot what it was like...
I think paranoia goes hand-in-hand with trust.
I don't want to get too much in detail, however my Mother had an emotional breakdown when I was 10 and sort of forgot about me and then left for a while. She sort of left me with a family friend who was supposed to be there looking after me but she left too...
My siblings were all older and they just sort of left too. Whoa this is hard explaining.
but anyway the siblings picking on the younger is a given. I was told by my sister that I wasn't normal, I was a hermit, I was weird and that if I did anything wrong god would be watching, etc.
These things are traumatizing aren't they? Instead of avoiding, try facing the situations more often and regardless of what you're thinking don't react to your paranoia or anxiety. Most of it is in the head. And if somebody is making fun of you, stand up for yourself, follow your morals and strongly believe in yourself. You are a great person and there's no need to worry so much. You are wonderful, amazing even. What about all the things that are good about you? Are they just overlooked for small flaws? I don't think so. Most people want to be friends with ppl they enjoy being around, they avoid the bad. So just enjoy yourself. If they're going to make fun of you, it's not you that should feel bad, it's actually them. Do you really want to be around those people? They do not deserve you. Not at all!

 

[Confuseddd]

Oh my goodness, I can relate!
First of yes, paranoia like crazy but I deal. And you're right about the feeling good thing only because you're avoiding stressful situations. Sometimes it's been so long for me when I'm convinced I'm fine and then I'll get into a nerve-wracking situation and be completely unprepared. I'd completely tricked myself and forgot what it was like...
I think paranoia goes hand-in-hand with trust.
I don't want to get too much in detail, however my Mother had an emotional breakdown when I was 10 and sort of forgot about me and then left for a while. She sort of left me with a family friend who was supposed to be there looking after me but she left too...
My siblings were all older and they just sort of left too. Whoa this is hard explaining.
but anyway the siblings picking on the younger is a given. I was told by my sister that I wasn't normal, I was a hermit, I was weird and that if I did anything wrong god would be watching, etc.
These things are traumatizing aren't they? Instead of avoiding, try facing the situations more often and regardless of what you're thinking don't react to your paranoia or anxiety. Most of it is in the head. And if somebody is making fun of you, stand up for yourself, follow your morals and strongly believe in yourself. You are a great person and there's no need to worry so much. You are wonderful, amazing even. What about all the things that are good about you? Are they just overlooked for small flaws? I don't think so. Most people want to be friends with ppl they enjoy being around, they avoid the bad. So just enjoy yourself. If they're going to make fun of you, it's not you that should feel bad, it's actually them. Do you really want to be around those people? They do not deserve you. Not at all!

thank you i appreciate all of that and im glad someone can relate to me in a way. I know i should stick up for myself and ever since i stopped hanging out with him i have been trying really hard to do that. Sometimes i think people are attacking me when they arnt even trying to now though ehhe. Man f**k anxiety im sure you are an amazing person too. i hate the fact that i feel so damn over looked all the time like if people got to know me they might like me or something. theres been other times i have had myself completely convinced there was something wrong with me and i wanted to die. i wrote a poem about it

 

[Logical Anxiety]

In the past, I got paranoia alot, due to my self esteem issues. It always felt like someone was talking behind my back, laughing at me or whatnot. It didn't exactly help when people actually stared at my face too. (for my horrible acne.)

At that time I didn't have friends to confide to, so I had to suck it up and bear it; my paranoia got half-cured last year, fortunately. However, when I'm alone and sitting/standing at a lonely area, where people can see me, I suddenly get paranoia again.