CK23 said:
So i've been trying to get rid of this void i have in life... i am very lonely and have no friends to speak of... There's no way i can connect with my cousins since they've stabbed me behind my back, and ridiculed and ignored me... There's no way i can connect with people i study with since they only think of me when they need me for their joint study or some help with study.... I only have hope in my 1st job where i have some nice people i deal with everyday in short my aqquaintances... I havent made a good impression at all sitting dull and quiet all the time and now i've decided to open up a little bit... i still cant talk and i just make eye contact and try to be with them outside of work.... do you think i'm doing okay or will i just get stuck up with an arranged marriage and have no friends at all in my life...
yes there is definitely hope for you. you seem to have made some progress already. i guess you are quite young, unlike me! the good news is that it gets easier as you get older and more experienced.
my advice re making friends is not to try too hard, but not to try too little. somewhere in between.
and keep your dignity even if you're not being as talkative as the others, its nothing ot be ashamed of, just a personality difference, a nice one, at that. lots of successful and famous people are introverted. its just as valid a way to be as to be extraverted, just its more of a minority than extroverted, but still good. i admit it can be difficult. but remember, its nothing to be embarassed about. try to get comfortable with the fact that you're the way you are, then you will relax more, and llikely have more you feel like saying. otherwise, just look friendly and interested. and be kind and caring.
from what i read on all the posts here, you are a bunch of sensitive and aware people, not out to harm anyone, just doing your best in a difficult situation, with great courage. school and college are the hardest, i think. a lot of people even without social anxiety have problems with work colleagues. they can seem to be very good friends with each other, and to be popular, but the others will still bad mouth them when they're not around. i've been vrey surprised, when i've got talking to people at work, at the problems so many people have, which i wouldnt have guessed.
hang in there, you have a lot to offer!
all the best
pippa