Do you obsess about conversations after they're over?


Active member
Absolutely. I go over everything--from body language to phrasing. It drives me insane. And if I did something I deem wrong? Forget about it... I've lost sleep over it too many times to count.

I do my best to not let these things bother me, but with SA, it tends to be be much more difficult.


Active member
YES . . . and this is despite having more than adequately polished social skills. Even more frustratingly, the obsessing isn’t limited to conversations, presentations, and interviews (i.e. interactions that sometimes actually merit review). I also obsess over even the most inconsequential of human interactions. Here are a few examples:

  • sneezing and/or coughing while greeting someone or excusing myself from something
  • mispronouncing a menu item when speaking to a cashier or waitress
  • unexpectedly shaking someone’s hand (I usually have clammy hands)
  • forgetting to hold the door open for whoever was walking behind me
  • someone noticing me staring at them
  • overanalyzing [possibly “inappropriate”] focal inflexions that I might’ve used when addressing someone, anyone

. . . and the list goes on and on and on... Seriously, it isn’t unusual for me to individually rehash the above [and other equally trivial] items for days/weeks/months, which is the PRIMARY reason I strongly prefer communicating via email, forums, chats, etc… This is because the just mentioned items provide a convenient method of reference should I want to examine a past interaction. In contrast, something such as in-person communication is complicated by vocal inflexions and/or body language, conversational attributes that are nearly impossible to recall with anything even resembling precision.


Well-known member
yes i do this , and usually i try to think of what I could have said differently no matter how small the detail. It makes me feel so dumb sometimes.