Conersations for me = asking questions. Any tips?

[DeMarco]

When I am have a conversation with someone I always find myself asking questions, questions and more questions just to get the conversation going. I do realize that asking tons of question is a way to seek approval and a way to " not talk about me". Spontaneity is very hard for me. That said can anyone relate or have any tips?

 

[SonicMan]

I can relate to that, but I don't have any tips, sorry. I am still trying to work out how to be spontaneous.

 

[JosephG]

Yeah I can definitely relate to this. It's just question after question because you don't feel you have anything to say or you are too afraid to speak.
What I've found with experimentation is that conversation is mostly statement followed by statement followed by statement... and then the odd question here or there.

It's all meant to be natural but of course with us it isn't so we start to think about what we are actually saying so you never really have any statements to make or any opinions or perspectives to share.

So try and practice making your own statements and opinions about what other people reply to you. Just say what immediately comes to mind or try to! Even if you think your opinions statements are going to sound stupid. Just force it out.

I don't feel I've been very articulate here but I've tried to offer some advice I use and stuff. I hope it helps you in some way

 

[3lefts]

Most talking is just saying what comes to mind, slightly moderated so that people aren't offensive. Some people don't moderate and don't care. I think the above articulated everything well.
Conversation = sharing what you think.

 

[DeMarco]

Yeah I can definitely relate to this. It's just question after question because you don't feel you have anything to say or you are too afraid to speak.
What I've found with experimentation is that conversation is mostly statement followed by statement followed by statement... and then the odd question here or there.

It's all meant to be natural but of course with us it isn't so we start to think about what we are actually saying so you never really have any statements to make or any opinions or perspectives to share.

So try and practice making your own statements and opinions about what other people reply to you. Just say what immediately comes to mind or try to! Even if you think your opinions statements are going to sound stupid. Just force it out.

I don't feel I've been very articulate here but I've tried to offer some advice I use and stuff. I hope it helps you in some way

Cool...........

 

[Sial Axetder]

Yeah I can definitely relate to this. It's just question after question because you don't feel you have anything to say or you are too afraid to speak.
What I've found with experimentation is that conversation is mostly statement followed by statement followed by statement... and then the odd question here or there.

It's all meant to be natural but of course with us it isn't so we start to think about what we are actually saying so you never really have any statements to make or any opinions or perspectives to share.

So try and practice making your own statements and opinions about what other people reply to you. Just say what immediately comes to mind or try to! Even if you think your opinions statements are going to sound stupid. Just force it out.

I don't feel I've been very articulate here but I've tried to offer some advice I use and stuff. I hope it helps you in some way

Yep, that does it.

Forcing out, still rather quiet, they laugh at certain said statements. Not against, just as it is said ... what was said struck a nerve.

Also, try talking about an event or two that happened to you. Conversation starter?
Just out of the blue, even. "I was frozen today." See what expressions there are. Might be a bit bold, worth it.