ClutterHead's Introduction

#1
Hi there. I'm a male from Europe who was recently diagnosed with AvPD. After many years of people not understanding me, this was a great relief to be honest. Some of my issues suddenly make more sense. So now, my intention is to learn more about myself, and the diagnosis itself. I also wish to interact with others who have AvPD, so that we might learn from each other, cope with things together, and so forth.

Some quick bits of info about me: I grew up with father who was an abusive alcoholic. I feel like many of my issues are trauma related due to that childhood. I have since ended all contact with him, but the trauma and the memories remains. I have many PTSD related symptoms, but so far, not enough to actually grant me a PTSD diagnosis.

I've read somewhere that people with AvPD can show signs of something called "selective competence" (meaning, functioning on some levels, mastering certain skills, while having problems with other things). I feel that applies to me, as I thrive on a few creative skills such as being a musician, but I still suffer from social anxiety, insecurities, could never hold a job, etc.

I'm currently in a relationship, but it's not always going so well. Sometimes I feel it's because I don't get the understanding I need, other times I feel like it's all my fault, that I'm ruining everything. I moved far away from the town I grew up in, so I currently don't have many friends either, which puts me through bouts of loneliness.

Anyway, that's all for now. There is probably more I could include in this introduction, but basically, these are some of the main things going on in my head nowadays, and I guess I'll elaborate more along the way.

I'm looking forward to communicating with you all.
 
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