PlaceboEffect said:
Why are children without any social experience confident then? They have no fears and no confidence issues. A kid can go to anyone he wants. He can approach a total stranger and have a big smile on.
Confidence doesn't come from past successes but from expectations we hold.
Good luck
That's not confidence that's just kids being naive and stupid. =D
Really though I think there's merit to BOTH points. Although the kid things a stretch I would not call that "confidence" or the confidence we're all seeking as we make our way into adulthood. Kids don't know any better thus why we always call them innocent. You lose innocence through experience =) If a kid goes up to a stranger and smiles and that stranger slaps the kid in the face, the kid probably won't go up to anymore strangers and smile anymore. A baby does not have confidence i doesn't KNOW or HAVE belief in ones self or abilities it isn't aware of that stuff. Instinct. It's out for it self because that's how babies survive... they don't think, they DO! And... that is the essence of self-confidence imo. ACTION. (but babies still don't have it how we think of it =D
Anyways not to get into that, back to the topic at hand, I don't believe SELF-CONFIDENCE is EITHER OR. Confidence IS experience. It also IS innate. How you THINK; how you react, your environment, brain chemistry many variables contribute but most importantly it's WHAT you DO... confidence is ACTION as I said above. BUT - AND - how you feel about that action. (now whether that action is good or bad or right or wrong is another story =) I mean, anyone can force themselves to do something and not believe in it.
Now - I am one to talk having very little action and thus confidence. But a lot is due to negative self talk, habits etc. stopping me from EXPERIENCING (DOING) to gain confidence; (consistently). I find ways to belittle and not believe in any action I do take. Affirmations do work. If you keep at it. And believe them or else that's just brain washing lol. But Like anything its hard work and requires commitment. I'm just lazy =)
