are we normal?

[uninspired_lady]

Hi everyone. I'm 23 and I have suffered from depression for the past 6 years of my life. I've talked to psychiatrists and I have taken antidepressants and so far nothing has work. During a conversation with a close friend about my depression, she insisted that there is nothing wrong with the way I feel or the fact that I feel suicidal every moment I'm awake. She insists that this world is so terrible and that the people that are actually happy and positive are the 'abnormal' that they're so close minded and emotionally empty that they can't see how horrible this world really is.
I was extremely upset because there is nothing normal about feeling or living depressed. It shouldn't be this way. I would love nothing more than to live a happy, depression-free life. According to her, being depressed is the way we should all be

 

[Helyna]

Nobody is NORMAL. We're all unique, so "normal" is only an illusion that is convenient for us to keep.

I'm very optimistic. I firmly believe that something good can be made of any situation. I completely disagree with your friend. Some happy people are blind and shallow, and some don't know what trouble is (they must not pay attention to the news), but a lot probably figure out how to make themselves happy in their situations. Of course, plenty aren't inclined for depression, which helps. But being happy IS good and IS desirable. I don't know what's wrong with your friend, but it sounds like she might be so miserable that she is trying to somehow find a way to make things better by making other people's lives seem worse.

I'm very sorry that you're so unhappy. DON'T TRY SUICIDE. That won't help anything. When you get through this (and I believe there must be a way out), you could be able to help other people who are suffering because you, unlike the psychiatrists, know what it feels like.

 

[Psychedelicious]

EDITED

 

[Chod77]

Normal. I wouldn't call depression normal. I am very depressed too and I think about suicide a lot but I don't think I'll ever do it. I don't think thats normal. I certainly don't feel normal. I know people say "What is normal anyway, who's really normal?" I don't think there is one person in the world who personifies what it means to be normal, but I do think there is a broad spectrum of what is normal. I am not in that spectrum. Anyone who wants to die isn't in that spectrum.

Good Luck...

 

[wooaah]

I agree with what people are saying. Theres no way life "should" be, and no normal way to act. Theres just different ways to act. The world is what it is. We can either be happy and enjoy the time we have, or we can be unhappy and waste it.

There are people in third world countries, in situations we might point out as the reason why the world is "horrible", who are way happier than us. When i see examples of these people i often wonder how they do it. Are they just naive? Of course not, they are the opposite of closed minded, they know exactly how hard life really is, more than any of us with food on the table and a roof to live under, and they've decided "hey, this isn't so bad, i can be happy".

Is it harder to be happy when you're starving, or is it harder to be happy when you have depression? I have no idea, but the lesson i learn from these people is that you can control your mentality regardless of your situation. And since its possible, i want to do it.

 

[wooaah]

I've talked to psychiatrists and I have taken antidepressants and so far nothing has work.

When i started speaking to a psychiatrist, and taking antidepressants, I was hoping for some kind of switch to flip. To be suddenly happy again. But it didn't happen. Gradually i realised that while my life didnt become rainbows and unicorns after taking a pill or speaking to a therapist. I did feel a little better.

Something good to try is, when you find something that makes you feel even a tiny bit better remember it, add it to your bag of tricks. As you grow this bag, it will become easier and easier to dig yourself out of a funk.

 

[dpr]

I sort of agree. Well, sometimes I agree. Like, looking at this world, it's hard to wonder why everybody isn't depressed. And sometimes I think we SHOULD be depressed in a world as shitty as this one.

On the other hand, I think a lot more can be accomplished by thinking positively (i.e. trying to make the world a better place) instead of thinking negatively (accepting the world as it is).

Hope that makes sense.

 

[SocialButterSlip]

I sort of agree. Well, sometimes I agree. Like, looking at this world, it's hard to wonder why everybody isn't depressed. And sometimes I think we SHOULD be depressed in a world as shitty as this one.

On the other hand, I think a lot more can be accomplished by thinking positively (i.e. trying to make the world a better place) instead of thinking negatively (accepting the world as it is).

Hope that makes sense.

Amen...

 

[social_phobia2008]

I agree with what people are saying. Theres no way life "should" be, and no normal way to act. Theres just different ways to act. The world is what it is. We can either be happy and enjoy the time we have, or we can be unhappy and waste it.

There are people in third world countries, in situations we might point out as the reason why the world is "horrible", who are way happier than us. When i see examples of these people i often wonder how they do it. Are they just naive? Of course not, they are the opposite of closed minded, they know exactly how hard life really is, more than any of us with food on the table and a roof to live under, and they've decided "hey, this isn't so bad, i can be happy".

Is it harder to be happy when you're starving, or is it harder to be happy when you have depression? I have no idea, but the lesson i learn from these people is that you can control your mentality regardless of your situation. And since its possible, i want to do it.

I have to disagree here : We can either be happy and enjoy the time we have, or we can be unhappy and waste it.

You see, happiness isn;t always a choise, like you go to the store and chose: I want that one or the other one, thus happiness or sadness.

If it were that simple to just choose how to fell, belive me, this forum wouldn't exist in the first place.

Of course, you can TRY to think positive and find positive aspects in allthat you do, but can you succed everytime to find more positive than nevatives ? especially when you have a predilection for pessimism. it's something you're born with, it's in your dna. of course learned pessimism exists, as well as learned optimism, and that's the thing we should concentrate on. to make it a habit

And another thing, i live in a 3rd world contry and i know how it is to have almost nothing to eat except bread and beans. I've been there and i can tell you, compasion from pther people living in the same miserable conditions make up for the lack of happiness asociated with this.

My grandma had her house burned 3 times and with the support from others got over it, but should she have been sp, i guess he couldn't get over it so easy cause support from others requires social interaction..so you know where i'm aiming.

i see homeless ppl everyday where i live and i often surprise them smiling, laughing, having a good time, and the explanation i found is that thay group toghether, witch helps them a LOT to overcome the lack of food , shelter.
ok, enough divagation

''Is it harder to be happy when you're starving, or is it harder to be happy when you have depression?'' I've gone through both, and the correct answer is B.

i'm glad you're trying to make out the bvest out of each situation. that';s the way to go. but i just answered your question : poverty VS depresion, witch is worst :wink: [/b]

 

[dpr]

Is it harder to be happy when you're starving, or is it harder to be happy when you have depression? I have no idea, but the lesson i learn from these people is that you can control your mentality regardless of your situation. And since its possible, i want to do it.

I have to disagree here : We can either be happy and enjoy the time we have, or we can be unhappy and waste it.

You see, happiness isn;t always a choise, like you go to the store and chose: I want that one or the other one, thus happiness or sadness.

If it were that simple to just choose how to fell, belive me, this forum wouldn't exist in the first place.

Of course, you can TRY to think positive and find positive aspects in allthat you do, but can you succed everytime to find more positive than nevatives ? especially when you have a predilection for pessimism. it's something you're born with, it's in your dna. of course learned pessimism exists, as well as learned optimism, and that's the thing we should concentrate on. to make it a habit

And another thing, i live in a 3rd world contry and i know how it is to have almost nothing to eat except bread and beans. I've been there and i can tell you, compasion from pther people living in the same miserable conditions make up for the lack of happiness asociated with this.

My grandma had her house burned 3 times and with the support from others got over it, but should she have been sp, i guess he couldn't get over it so easy cause support from others requires social interaction..so you know where i'm aiming.

i see homeless ppl everyday where i live and i often surprise them smiling, laughing, having a good time, and the explanation i found is that thay group toghether, witch helps them a LOT to overcome the lack of food , shelter.
ok, enough divagation

''Is it harder to be happy when you're starving, or is it harder to be happy when you have depression?'' I've gone through both, and the correct answer is B.

i'm glad you're trying to make out the bvest out of each situation. that';s the way to go. but i just answered your question : poverty VS depresion, witch is worst :wink: [/b]

Well put.

I also think that unhappiness can be a good thing in a way. I mean, a lot of good things have happened from people being unhappy. If blacks weren't unhappy with the way they were treated by whites back in the day, then we wouldn't have had the civil rights movement. If women hadn't been unhappy with their role in politics, they never would have organized and demanded the right to vote, etc.

In other words, being unhappy with yourself or a situation doesn't necessarily mean you are "thinking negatively," IMO