Anyone here who doesn't want to get better

[Silentknight]

If so how bad is your SA or AvPD? I know my AvPD is bad I can barely leave my house I don't make friends or flirt with girls even though I really wish I could, I'm starting to push away the one person I can call friend, I've begun to stop talking unless absolutly necessary, and on top of all this I self harm do to severe depression yet I don't want to or am maybe afraid of getting better like my SIG says I fear that getting rid of my problems will also take away what few good things I have. I can say that my problems have made me a better human being I am grateful for what few good things I experince such a passing smile or something like that also I have forced myself to learn as much as possible so I can say I am knowledgeable. Now I'm curious does anyone else NOT want to get better? Why? And How bad is your social phobia?

 

[stephen]

I tell myself that I am comfortable with my SA but I think that is just a convenient way of avoiding the effort of confronting or changing it. Truth be told when I think of something like group therapy the anxiety makes me want to vomit.

 

[DanFC]

In certain respects, both yes and no. I'd like to get to the point where I can socialize when I want to. Yet I want to keep the shy qualities I have when I don't want to be social. So I want to keep my personality (of when wanting to be sociable or not), but I would want to change my responses between a (social) occurrence and my personality.

 

[Hello*22]

Well, i'd have nothing to complain about, so yes and no!

 

[Hellhound]

I just want to be able to function normally... I'm not the most social person ever (and I don't want to, i've always been quiet by nature), but it would be great if i didn't have the irrational fears.

 

[Lorraine Manca]

i dont have the motivation to get better.

 

[Psychedelicious]

Happy to be Unhappy

Umm why would anyone not want to get better?? Not being motivated, or even trying at all doesn't mean that you still don't wish you were better. I think even if you're 'comfortable' doesn't mean you don't wish things were better? It just means that you say you are settling for what is, but I'm sure no one is really truly comfortable. Unless you are happy to be unhappy or something I don't understand why anyone would not want to get better?

 

[Lorraine Manca]

Re: Happy to be Unhappy

Umm why would anyone not want to get better?? Not being motivated, or even trying at all doesn't mean that you still don't wish you were better. I think even if you're 'comfortable' doesn't mean you don't wish things were better? It just means that you say you are settling for what is, but I'm sure no one is really truly comfortable. Unless you are happy to be unhappy or something I don't understand why anyone would not want to get better?

in the context of depression, i think you're right, everybody wants to get better. but as far as social anxiety goes, thats more tricky, because its hard to imagine what better would even mean when you simply dont enjoy being around most people. thats what i gathered from the thread

 

[dooby-duck]

I want to get better but find the things I need to do to get better too daunting to face. I put on an act a lot of the time like I don't care that I'm missing out on a lot of life. To get better would mean telling people how I feel, face to face, and admitting this to my family. Talking to doctors as well, I'm not sure I will ever be able to do it. I prefer to work on these things myself but progress is extremely slow. I can't see myself sitting in a doctors office and talking about this stuff.

 

[tmill]

Yes, I definately want to get better I see a doctor go to SA meetings. The feeling of anxiety attacks I just can't deal with anymore. Not to mention the panic attacks which resemble a seizure. Life plain and simple just sucks with this! I'm 29 and missing out on all the great things about life because I don't have one. The thing that pushes me no matter how bad it feels to put myself out there is the idea of a wife and kids. I will never make a great husband or a father with this SA. Have I gotten better well no, but I still believe in hope. Also I made some great friends at these SA meetings. People understand me and don't think I am some strange messed up person.

 

[SoulSeeker]

Completely feked up with BDD/SA.

Though I do have hope..because in these past few days..something has made me feel stronger. I have modest dreams that i want to fulfill..so yeah i want to get better. Really badly. Only better enough to do the things I want to do...I dont want to pressure myself into thinking I need to completely change. Because I dont.

 

[bigrob]

Get better?

I wish I never had it. It has ruined my life...literally. At 38 my life is 1/2 over and I don't have a damn thing to show for it.