Anxiety when speaking in front of people

[markb_]

Hi All,

I've never been keen on speaking in public, but I've done a number of successful presentations in the past. Recently, though, I've got very anxious when having to speak in social situations. For example, during meetings at work when everyone has to introduce themselves (as people from different business areas are present), my heart starts thumping while I await my turn, and when it arrives I can't talk properly - my voice just goes really shaky. It happened again today when I went on a training course - there was a "round the room" introductions thing to get started, and again my heart was thumping, I wanted to get out of the room, and I couldn't speak properly. I find it very frustrating and embarrassing, but don't seem to be able to stop it.

I was just wondering if anyone else suffers from this? If so, what do you do to overcome it?

 

[Solitude]

It's normal. Public speaking is usually a person's number one fear.

I have a meeting that I attend every morning at 7:15 at work. There are about 10 people at the meeting and we all have to brief about what's going on in our sections. I remember the first time I went to the meeting, I was just waiting until it was my turn... and I was just like you. Heart pounding, sweaty palms, shaky voice. I've been going to this meeting for about 5 months now and I still can't speak "normally" at it. Every time it's my turn my voice gets all shaky and I can't ever make eye contact. My eyes usually go straight down to the table or dart around the room. It's pretty embarrassing because I'm sure everyone notices it, but luckily they never say anything.

I wish I had some advice for you. I can say that it gets easier with time though. I don't get the pounding heart thing anymore at least. I guess it's just like anything else, practice makes perfect.

 

[westminster]

40mg Propranolol, 10mg Diazepam, one hour before the presentation.

Take care with such drugs and use them with a huge amount of common sense. But they've been a lifesaver for me.

 

[markb_]

40mg Propranolol, 10mg Diazepam, one hour before the presentation.

Take care with such drugs and use them with a huge amount of common sense. But they've been a lifesaver for me.

I wouldn't be keen on drugs... plus, I don't know when the situations are likely to occur.

 

[Hellhound]

I definitely can't speak in public, it's too overwhelming.. so i'd rather avoid it. I would give you some advice, but that's one of the things i never could control or overcome... I just don't know how to do it

 

[Noca]

I wouldn't be keen on drugs... plus, I don't know when the situations are likely to occur.

You dont know when a presentation is likely to occur? within at least 30 minutes?

 

[Scotsman]

This might sound silly but if it is only this situation why cant you act like you do in others? Why is this one so hard?

I hope that doesnt sound blunt, I dont mean it like that its a genuine question. Maybe the answer will help...

 

[krfoss]

Hey Markb

This happens all the time and is a HUGE fear of most people. Social Phobia often doesnt make sense, like when someone is nervouse speaking in front of 10 people, but can speak and perform in front of 1000. Its weird, but its being afraid of social judgment or ridicule and can totally show up in the professional setting.

Now then, you can try the "image everyone naked" sort of thing, but I dont think it helps. Get yourself a coach or therapist that can walk you though relaxation techniques and exposures to speaking in public. Its a normal fear and you can work though it.

Avoid the drugs for now. If it get so intense that you cant handle it, leave the board room, or avoid them all together, then you may want to think about some meds, but try the skills training and relaxation first!

 

[limetree]

I've also done some successful presentations in the past too because there was plenty of time to rehearse. I used to always put my head down to avoid the teacher's gaze whenever we had to do those round the room introductions though where you had to talk spontaneously. I would frantically try to think of something to say, maybe write it down if it wasn't my turn to go first. Sometimes I'm so nervous I can't think properly though so if I were in your situation I'd probably say something like "I usually need preparation time to think through what I want to say before I can provide an adequate response so bear with me [go through with a brief explanation].. if I think of something I forgot to mention later I'll write it down and notify you."

 

[Noca]

Hey Markb

This happens all the time and is a HUGE fear of most people. Social Phobia often doesnt make sense, like when someone is nervouse speaking in front of 10 people, but can speak and perform in front of 1000. Its weird, but its being afraid of social judgment or ridicule and can totally show up in the professional setting.

Now then, you can try the "image everyone naked" sort of thing, but I dont think it helps. Get yourself a coach or therapist that can walk you though relaxation techniques and exposures to speaking in public. Its a normal fear and you can work though it.

Avoid the drugs for now. If it get so intense that you cant handle it, leave the board room, or avoid them all together, then you may want to think about some meds, but try the skills training and relaxation first!

Controlled CBT exposure therapy works best for SA giving permanent results.

 

[Scotsman]

I know its a big fear kfross and that it doesnt make sense but maybe there is actually something more specific going on. If you can do OK in some professional settings but not others what is different about it -- is it the setting, the formality of it, an attitude? Once you know whats different you can then work from there to unpack it. Then you can come to experience the fear as irrational rather then simply understand that it is. Relaxation and resisting your attempt to run away from the situation, mentally or physically, can help but it takes practice and concentration.