Neddy, that woman at your work, i wouldn't go as far as to call her a "lady". She sounds like a snake.
Hey, i will quote something from "Choose the happiness habit" for you to consider.
"about three months ago I was thinking about leaving my job. escaping would be more like it. Some of the poeple i woeked with were so negative and critical. when i told my boss i was offered another job, he counteroffered with such a large raise and other benefits that, after considering my options, i decided to stay for the next assignment. i'm in a freelance business, and for that amount of money i felt i could "grin and bear it" for a few more months. besides, i'd always wanted to know how it would feel to "laugh all the way to the bank".
I soon realized i had made the wrong decision. every morning as i walked from my car to my office i was miserable with anticipation and dread, thinking of the people i had to put up with. i t made me crazy! and to think i believed the money would make up for the misery i faced.
Then i began to use the principles taught in CHOOSE THE HAPPINESS HABIT. I immediately realized that i was focusing all my attention on people i didn't like at work instead of the ones that i did like!
Idecided to change my focus. As i waslked to my office each morning i consciously disciplined myself to think about the co-workers i thought were terific. i focused on how much i liked these people and how i hoped we would work together on many occasions during our careers. what a difference! i actually began to look forward to going to work!
The change in my attitude snowballed and began to affect other people around me. they started being more cheerful and fun to be around. it was hard for me to believe that such a simple action -taking control of my thoughts - could make such a huge difference. "
Neddy, usually people like that hate themselves and hate their lives, so they would rather take it out on other people rather than themselves, like we do. They feel a lack of control somehow in their lives and to somehow gain control back, they take advantage of other people. See her for what she is, and soon you will start to pity her. She's so unhappy that it gives her PLEASURE to hurt others. People like that never change, we do.
You are in a much more peaceful place than she is, even though you may not see it, YOU ARE in a better place in your life than she is, trust me.
Pity her..when you see her, tell yourself that she is lost and if it wasn't you, she would be trying to stab someone else's back.
Once you start working on your self-esteem, it's so funny how those types of snaky people slither off when they realize they're not AFFECTING YOU.
don't worry about what she is doing. You're only focus should be "how can i be the best employee? HOw can i do a good job? and if you're doing this and doing your job, that is DOING YOUR BEST..and that's all you can do. ignore her. she's lost and her heart is cold. let her ruin her own life.
try not to let such a mean person have control over you. when you're around her, try and think about all the things you like about yourself. Don't know what you like about yourself, THINK HARDER. List some things. think about it...what qualities do you like about yourself?
for instance: if you like your intelligence think : "i like how i can figure things out..i like my intelligence
i like my sense of practicality
I like how I never give up on trying to feel happier, i like my drive and ambition
things like these.
when you start to think about these things, and believing them, which is the important part, you'll start to feel better.
and i'll bet dollars to doughnuts if you do this in front of her and you start to feel more confident, she'll slither off.
and who cares if she's talking behind your back! everyone knows she's a snake.
you have to learn not to care. becuase HAPPY PEOPLE, NICE PEOPLE DON"T do that! they're comfortable with themselves and don't feel the need to hurt other people. those are the best people, let me tell ya.
so i hope this helps you feel better about that reptile you work with. neddy that woman is in every workplace. trust me, you can find her everywhere you go.
Keep your thoughts positive!
Jess