Hello people,
I am new to this forum and I am looking to talk to people who suffer with ROCD who are in a relationship or not.
I dont have OCD/ROCD myself but my boyfriend does. We first met over seas where we were both studying about 8 months ago and we hit it off straight way, we just got along so well and loved spending time together. After a few times catching up my bf told me he had OCD and that we couldn't have sex because he was worried about getting me pregnant or that I had HIV and he would catch it. I was really surprised to hear him say this because he showed no signs of feeling this way. I told him that it was ok, my dad had OCD so I am aware of the disorder and that if he felt funny about having sex cause of the thoughs he was having then we didn't have to do that. A number of weeks went by and we got closer and closer to each other and eventually ended up sleeping together but he freeked out afterwards and didn't wanna see me but eventually we caught up again and spoke about what happened and things were ok again.
The time came when we had to leave each other and head back home. It was really hard saying good bye because we had got pretty close to each other and wanted to stay together. We decided to keep in touch through Skype and talked everday when we got home and decided to have a long distant relationship and work out how we can be together.
I will be flying to see him in January and stay with him for 2 months which we are very much looking forward to. I bought my ticket the other day and within a few hours his OCD started acting up really bad and he told me he was worried that it wont work out and I will end up hating him and with that came alot of other worries that I wont mention. He told me when we first met that he has never been able to hold a relationship down for more than 6 months because of his OCD, he said the thoughts get really bad when he is in a relationship and it becomes to much for him to handle so he breaks it off. Every time he breaks it off it is not what he wants to do but he does it because the thoughs go away and he can have some peace. In all of his other relationships he has never told his gf he has OCD he has just kept it to himself but with me he tells me everything we always talk about how he is feeling and he say it makes a big diffrence. However, even though we talk about this stuff he said it still might not work out he still might break up with me if the thoughs get to much for him but this isn't something he wants to do because he loves me so much. He said I need to understand that it is hard for him to tell me this because he is worried I will leave him and thats not what he wants, he wants to be together but just in case it doesn't work out he thought he should tell me so I wont hate him.
I would really like to hear peoples thoughs on my situation. I really love my bf and want our relationship to work. Do you think the fact that we talk about his OCD would help us to stay together, I mean will his thoughts become more easier to manage if he talks about it with me?? I think he is just afraid our relationship will end bad like all the other relationships he has had but he never spoke about his OCD in his previous relationships so I am not suprised it failed. Is anyone else in a relationship and it is working out? Tell me how you get by and what you partner does to support you.
Some advice would be much appreciated
I am new to this forum and I am looking to talk to people who suffer with ROCD who are in a relationship or not.
I dont have OCD/ROCD myself but my boyfriend does. We first met over seas where we were both studying about 8 months ago and we hit it off straight way, we just got along so well and loved spending time together. After a few times catching up my bf told me he had OCD and that we couldn't have sex because he was worried about getting me pregnant or that I had HIV and he would catch it. I was really surprised to hear him say this because he showed no signs of feeling this way. I told him that it was ok, my dad had OCD so I am aware of the disorder and that if he felt funny about having sex cause of the thoughs he was having then we didn't have to do that. A number of weeks went by and we got closer and closer to each other and eventually ended up sleeping together but he freeked out afterwards and didn't wanna see me but eventually we caught up again and spoke about what happened and things were ok again.
The time came when we had to leave each other and head back home. It was really hard saying good bye because we had got pretty close to each other and wanted to stay together. We decided to keep in touch through Skype and talked everday when we got home and decided to have a long distant relationship and work out how we can be together.
I will be flying to see him in January and stay with him for 2 months which we are very much looking forward to. I bought my ticket the other day and within a few hours his OCD started acting up really bad and he told me he was worried that it wont work out and I will end up hating him and with that came alot of other worries that I wont mention. He told me when we first met that he has never been able to hold a relationship down for more than 6 months because of his OCD, he said the thoughts get really bad when he is in a relationship and it becomes to much for him to handle so he breaks it off. Every time he breaks it off it is not what he wants to do but he does it because the thoughs go away and he can have some peace. In all of his other relationships he has never told his gf he has OCD he has just kept it to himself but with me he tells me everything we always talk about how he is feeling and he say it makes a big diffrence. However, even though we talk about this stuff he said it still might not work out he still might break up with me if the thoughs get to much for him but this isn't something he wants to do because he loves me so much. He said I need to understand that it is hard for him to tell me this because he is worried I will leave him and thats not what he wants, he wants to be together but just in case it doesn't work out he thought he should tell me so I wont hate him.
I would really like to hear peoples thoughs on my situation. I really love my bf and want our relationship to work. Do you think the fact that we talk about his OCD would help us to stay together, I mean will his thoughts become more easier to manage if he talks about it with me?? I think he is just afraid our relationship will end bad like all the other relationships he has had but he never spoke about his OCD in his previous relationships so I am not suprised it failed. Is anyone else in a relationship and it is working out? Tell me how you get by and what you partner does to support you.
Some advice would be much appreciated