Advice....Again

[Tempus35]

I am wondering if I can get some advice.(Semi Long, sorry I am bad at taking without details)

I am currently living at home again, after I was in college. I am home because last semester I had a major depressive episode and stopped doing anything, starting really messing up school. My anxiety came back 10 fold. So I thought I will take a break from college and come back in the fall. The idea was to go home and start new meds, to see if it helped any, and to see a therapist. I have been doing both for about 2 months now, and nothing really has changed.

I am freaking out about going back to school. Not only because of what issues might return but because I finally admit I have no freaking clue what I want to do. I love science and technology, but degrees in both require alot of dedication to working at them, and I cant seem to get that dedication down. Math is a killer to me, it isnt that I am not learning it, but I am not a natural at it and so it takes me time to learn, and as I said above I cant get myself to spend that time.

The other thing is that I am running low on money on all fronts. Some stupid loans are trying to get me to pay them, and they say I cant defer them etc. To compound that one, it is under my dads name for me, and he is yelling at me about it, understandable in some ways since it is like $200 a month and he too has issues with money, though less then some of the other family members. I still owe the school for dropping out during the semester(around $500), and it has to be paid before I can go back. I would like to have an apartment outside of the dorms if I go back but have no money to put upfront. There are no jobs in this town, not only because it is small, 5000 or so people, or the fact that I am better at tech jobs and ones outside customer support, but there is nothing, not with the way things are now.

So if you have bothered reading this, which I hope someone did, what are your thoughts on what I should do?

 

[apollo]

I understand a lot of the things that you're going through.

I went through some of the same things.

Don't go back to school for the wrong reasons. It takes a lot of dedication and you have to be prepared for possible 'road blocks.' If I were you I would take some time off from all these worries. Be realistic about what you think you can achieve. Try to get a full time or part time job in a different area (a big city?) to pay your loan off. Being at home is maybe detrimental?

If you go to school right away and something goes wrong the debt will only make you feel worse.

Be more prepared next time. Anticipate the courses you'll be taking and study them. This will increase your comfort level when you take these classes. Especially math.

Also there is NO time limit on things, no matter what others say including your parents. And don't overwhelm yourself with a full time school schedule.

I hope some of this advice is of some value.

 

[abby_g]

Hi. I bothered to reply because maybe(just maybe) my opinion might help you. I went through the same situation, only that, now I don't anymore because I decided to enroll in distance education.(because just like you my parents are angry because I dropped out of school in the middle of the semester so it meant that I owe the school a lot of money. I dropped just because I felt like doing so) Now I don't stay idle in our house anymore because I'm studying, the only difference is that I'm homeschooled.) But of course I'm not telling you to follow my advice because I don't know you and your situation completely. Just letting you know my opinion. =)

 

[Tempus35]

Hi. I bothered to reply because maybe(just maybe) my opinion might help you. I went through the same situation, only that, now I don't anymore because I decided to enroll in distance education.(because just like you my parents are angry because I dropped out of school in the middle of the semester so it meant that I owe the school a lot of money. I dropped just because I felt like doing so) Now I don't stay idle in our house anymore because I'm studying, the only difference is that I'm homeschooled.) But of course I'm not telling you to follow my advice because I don't know you and your situation completely. Just letting you know my opinion. =)

I did distance learning at one point, I was alright with it, though I still didn't do much. But the things I like, science, you can't do distance learning, at least not well if at all.

 

[Tempus35]

I understand a lot of the things that you're going through.

I went through some of the same things.

Don't go back to school for the wrong reasons. It takes a lot of dedication and you have to be prepared for possible 'road blocks.' If I were you I would take some time off from all these worries. Be realistic about what you think you can achieve. Try to get a full time or part time job in a different area (a big city?) to pay your loan off. Being at home is maybe detrimental?

If you go to school right away and something goes wrong the debt will only make you feel worse.

Be more prepared next time. Anticipate the courses you'll be taking and study them. This will increase your comfort level when you take these classes. Especially math.

Also there is NO time limit on things, no matter what others say including your parents. And don't overwhelm yourself with a full time school schedule.

I hope some of this advice is of some value.

Moving to a bigger city to get a better job, sadly isnt an option, it would cost way to much to move and I am literally broke, and my family isnt much better off.

 

[Devrium]

Hi... I don't know if my advice will help you any (and sorry for such a long reply) but..

Have you thought about going to a vocational school instead? If you like Science and Technology... See, my situation is quite different from yours but... well I started out in Community College and I got my AA degree and minors in math, chemistry, music theory, and Japanese because I had NO idea what I wanted to do... when I went to University I had to choose a major so I went into Applied Developmental Psychology with a minor in Special Education...thinking it was the right field for me. Really I lied to myself because my true love has been and always will be chemistry and the sciences... however I was too afraid to try to get my degree in that field because it was so math intensive. And while I am strong at math, I doubt myself big time so I was really really intimidated by the courses... Anyway, I persevered with my Psych degree and ended up graduating with my Bachelors of Science in that... when I got out of college I realized that it was completely useless to have a BS in psych because without a masters there isn't much you can do. I ended up working in a nursing home wiping old poopy butts... not exactly my dream job.. so I started looking around and I decided I couldn't afford to get my Masters just yet so I found a vocational school and did a 9 month training program to become a pharmacy technician (of course I didn't realize then that you could get trained on the job for that in some places...) but still, it was the best decision of my life... I mean I some what feel that I wasted 5 years on my other 2 degrees but I don't really regret it. I learned a lot, and it gives me more options for jobs... but those vocational and technical schools are cheaper, faster, and in my opinion you get better jobs that pay more (unless you get your masters or PhD I guess). I mean with my B.S. degree I was making $11 an hour. With my Pharmacy Certificate I started out at $17.50 and before I lost my job (due to my SA and other stuff) I was making $25.01 an hour...

so anyway there are tons of programs out there besides pharmacy of course depending on your interests.. and usually the vocational and technical schools are cheaper, have smaller class sizes, and shorter days (not to mention I realized that the math at those schools is so much easier and simplified--at least in pharmacy... specific to your area of study rather than at University where you have to take like 5 extra math classes that aren't even relevant).. also, they usually take less than a year to earn you a degree. Plus you can do many of them online...

Well, it's just a suggestion.. But maybe worth looking into for you? Hope that helped a little. I understand about being freaked out about going back to school. I almost dropped out plenty of times.. but in the end I don't regret sticking it out one bit..

 

[Tempus35]

Hi... I don't know if my advice will help you any (and sorry for such a long reply) but..

Have you thought about going to a vocational school instead? If you like Science and Technology... See, my situation is quite different from yours but... well I started out in Community College and I got my AA degree and minors in math, chemistry, music theory, and Japanese because I had NO idea what I wanted to do... when I went to University I had to choose a major so I went into Applied Developmental Psychology with a minor in Special Education...thinking it was the right field for me. Really I lied to myself because my true love has been and always will be chemistry and the sciences... however I was too afraid to try to get my degree in that field because it was so math intensive. And while I am strong at math, I doubt myself big time so I was really really intimidated by the courses... Anyway, I persevered with my Psych degree and ended up graduating with my Bachelors of Science in that... when I got out of college I realized that it was completely useless to have a BS in psych because without a masters there isn't much you can do. I ended up working in a nursing home wiping old poopy butts... not exactly my dream job.. so I started looking around and I decided I couldn't afford to get my Masters just yet so I found a vocational school and did a 9 month training program to become a pharmacy technician (of course I didn't realize then that you could get trained on the job for that in some places...) but still, it was the best decision of my life... I mean I some what feel that I wasted 5 years on my other 2 degrees but I don't really regret it. I learned a lot, and it gives me more options for jobs... but those vocational and technical schools are cheaper, faster, and in my opinion you get better jobs that pay more (unless you get your masters or PhD I guess). I mean with my B.S. degree I was making $11 an hour. With my Pharmacy Certificate I started out at $17.50 and before I lost my job (due to my SA and other stuff) I was making $25.01 an hour...

so anyway there are tons of programs out there besides pharmacy of course depending on your interests.. and usually the vocational and technical schools are cheaper, have smaller class sizes, and shorter days (not to mention I realized that the math at those schools is so much easier and simplified--at least in pharmacy... specific to your area of study rather than at University where you have to take like 5 extra math classes that aren't even relevant).. also, they usually take less than a year to earn you a degree. Plus you can do many of them online...

Well, it's just a suggestion.. But maybe worth looking into for you? Hope that helped a little. I understand about being freaked out about going back to school. I almost dropped out plenty of times.. but in the end I don't regret sticking it out one bit..

Thanks for the advice, I did go to a tech school my last 2 years of high school, I earned about 5 certificates, sadly they we rent a full college till about a year after I stopped going. I agree they are easier etc, but the one here doesn't have stuff when it comes to science, they have some tech stuff, but I am leaning more the other way. I can't say I am strong in math myself, but it is what is scaring me when it come to the degrees I want.

 

[Devrium]

Thanks for the advice, I did go to a tech school my last 2 years of high school, I earned about 5 certificates, sadly they we rent a full college till about a year after I stopped going. I agree they are easier etc, but the one here doesn't have stuff when it comes to science, they have some tech stuff, but I am leaning more the other way. I can't say I am strong in math myself, but it is what is scaring me when it come to the degrees I want.

The seeds of firm conviction already contain within them the flowers and fruits of happiness. But if we plant the seeds of self-doubt, naturally, only noxious weeds will sprout. (Advice I never take, but certainly can share lol)

And, for what it's worth (and it's not much at all).. I believe in you...

 

[Tempus35]

The seeds of firm conviction already contain within them the flowers and fruits of happiness. But if we plant the seeds of self-doubt, naturally, only noxious weeds will sprout. (Advice I never take, but certainly can share lol)

And, for what it's worth (and it's not much at all).. I believe in you...

Thanks for that, and I am like you, I can tell you many things that would be useful for me, if only I used them, or though that way.