Abusing arthritis pain tylenol and wanting to die

[CrazyGirl]

Ok. yeah, that's my drug of choice. That and booze, most of the time beer. I just can't the emotional pains of being lonely and constant rejection when trying to make friends and maintaining the friendships anymore. Also, I shouldn't have to be the one almost making the effort to call and text others. I've been taking some arthritis pain tylenol 650mg a day, usually 7 cause that's my lucky #. And no, I don't have arthritis. Just taking them for the sake of taking a drug that's legal. Few times a week I drink beer to the point of getting drunk.

For awhile. I've been having dreams and thoughts of wanting to die. Being in my early 30's, never been on a date yet so obviously, I haven't been in a relationship either. :: Its depressing when I go out there and try and try then things don't go as planned. When I see my best buddy that I don't see much of anymore, I admire his confidence and being outgoing with people. He's also a ladies' man which makes me feel like crap because I can barely get a man to notice me and carry on a conversation.

I hate having severe social anxiety and having mild deafness (yes, I do wear hearing aids). Seeing a counselor/therapist isn't helping.

All I want is to die because I don't think anyone will really notice expect family that I don't even care about anyways.

 

[MikeyC]

I'm so sorry you're going through this emotional turmoil. ::

You're aware that you're addicted to Tylenol, so that's a good start. You should almost certainly stop taking that (easier said than done, I know). Maybe your therapist can help you with that. Have you told him/her about that?

There will be a man out there for you. Having mild deafness shouldn't be a hindrance. I know a girl who was born deaf, but can hear now (not sure of the medical specifics) and she's now got a loving boyfriend and a child. My point is that a hearing aid and mild deafness is not going to deter men.

Severe social anxiety obviously won't help, but that's why you're in therapy, right? Can you ask your "ladies man" friend if you can go out with him one day and maybe you can strike a conversation with someone?

Why don't you care about your family? Do you not get along?

Sorry for all the questions.

 

[CrazyGirl]

I'm so sorry you're going through this emotional turmoil. ::

You're aware that you're addicted to Tylenol, so that's a good start. You should almost certainly stop taking that (easier said than done, I know). Maybe your therapist can help you with that. Have you told him/her about that?

There will be a man out there for you. Having mild deafness shouldn't be a hindrance. I know a girl who was born deaf, but can hear now (not sure of the medical specifics) and she's now got a loving boyfriend and a child. My point is that a hearing aid and mild deafness is not going to deter men.

Severe social anxiety obviously won't help, but that's why you're in therapy, right? Can you ask your "ladies man" friend if you can go out with him one day and maybe you can strike a conversation with someone?

Why don't you care about your family? Do you not get along?

Sorry for all the questions.

That's okay. No, not really. I was more so the black sheep in the family and always somewhat felt excluded from family conversations. My "ladies man" friend, I don't see him as much anymore. We used to go out to do things together a lot, mostly car rides or just hanging out at home.

With the dating and relationship issue, emotionally feel like a 12yr. old in a 30's body. Then on top of that my voice is quiet and sometimes mumble/stutter when I talk.

 

[Feathers]

Hey Girl,

You know pain meds have become one of the most abused drugs worldwide - I recently read/heard about it...
There are support forums for withdrawing from meds, maybe for this too??
Can you get any support in RL too? Maybe a support group or people to hang out with?
Is there a club/support group for other deaf/half deaf people?
Any interesting courses you could sign up to & meet people there?

Meds aren't without side-effects, please get yourself informed! Tylenol - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia
Paracetamol - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia
Are you willing to risk liver failure or kidney failure??

I know someone who ruined what could possibly be a good relationship or happy marriage with addiction to pain-relief drugs and such!!

If you are Catholic (or could be) there are Ave Maria Singles where 'inexperience' is a plus!!! People of other religions (or even some not-religious) might appreciate it too!!
There are 30+ guys on POF (and elsewhere) who never dated too, maybe you can learn together with one/some of them?? Some more experienced guys can be 'happy to teach' too hehe.. There is an Online dating thread here where some dating experiences are being discussed - some of it can be helpful... It depends how you present this info to the other person!! (There are forums on POF and elsewhere too..) You can learn to date without telling 'everything upfront' and only decide to tell if the other person seems trustworthy enough!!

I've known a really beautiful girl who was mildly deaf too and wore a hearing aid (she usually had hair over it, no one really knew if wasn't told) - she was pursued by many guys (one was soo intimidated of her and so shy, it was soo sweet lol!!) she ended up dating a cool guy, from what I know!!

Dating or trying to date/party can be an endeavour... Really depends on people you're with etc! Yeah it can get annoying to see people 'coupled up', one can still meet new single people too!! (even if you live 'in the middle of nowhere' like I do!)
It's good that you were BRAVE & did things & have kept trying!!
Someone told me she had to cry a lot sometimes, but kept going out - and finally met the guy she then married!!

 

[nafadda]

yep..if you keep taking tylenol in doses like that you will eventually need a liver transplant..and that won't be a 'fun' thing ...most people have to go on a long list to even get one. a lot of people don't think about the damage they are doing to their bodies until the damage is so far along that something bad has happened to it.

and to have to go to a hospital and have surgery really will suck.

Tylenol Liver Damage - How Tylenol Can Damage the Liver

 

[MikeyC]

That's okay. No, not really. I was more so the black sheep in the family and always somewhat felt excluded from family conversations. My "ladies man" friend, I don't see him as much anymore. We used to go out to do things together a lot, mostly car rides or just hanging out at home.

With the dating and relationship issue, emotionally feel like a 12yr. old in a 30's body. Then on top of that my voice is quiet and sometimes mumble/stutter when I talk.

That's unfortunate that you were always excluded. It mustn't be a fun thing to go through. Regarding your friend, maybe you should see him some more. Get back into regular contact and organise a night out or something.

What do you mean by an emotional 12-year-old? Don't worry about your voice. All the best girl are quiet.

 

[Feathers]

Many girls (and guys) with sa (or without it!) can be emotionally 'younger' - some even 'look younger'!! Maybe you can hang out with some younger people, like in their 20s or so? I've had friends who were older or younger than me, some can be quite COOL!!

There can also be a lot of divorced people around, some may appreciate it that you don't have a psycho ex or troubled kids!! Be proud of who you are!! & know your worth!!
Guys in their 40s or so may appreciate your youthfulness!! (and some can be immature too yikes, even if they've been married or in relationships before!!)

Did you watch that TV series about deaf FBI agent Sue Thomas: F.B.Eye - she was soo COOL!!
The cover song from it is AWESOME too: Rosemary's Granddaughter by Jessica Andrews
Who I am (Rosemary's Grandaughter) lyrics - YouTube (I thought it was quicker though??)

Do you know sign language? I always wanted to learn it!!

 

[Little Miss Muffet]

Ok. yeah, that's my drug of choice. That and booze, most of the time beer. I just can't the emotional pains of being lonely and constant rejection when trying to make friends and maintaining the friendships anymore. Also, I shouldn't have to be the one almost making the effort to call and text others. I've been taking some arthritis pain tylenol 650mg a day, usually 7 cause that's my lucky #. And no, I don't have arthritis. Just taking them for the sake of taking a drug that's legal. Few times a week I drink beer to the point of getting drunk.

For awhile. I've been having dreams and thoughts of wanting to die. Being in my early 30's, never been on a date yet so obviously, I haven't been in a relationship either. :: Its depressing when I go out there and try and try then things don't go as planned. When I see my best buddy that I don't see much of anymore, I admire his confidence and being outgoing with people. He's also a ladies' man which makes me feel like crap because I can barely get a man to notice me and carry on a conversation.

I hate having severe social anxiety and having mild deafness (yes, I do wear hearing aids). Seeing a counselor/therapist isn't helping.

All I want is to die because I don't think anyone will really notice expect family that I don't even care about anyways.

------------------------------------------------------------------------

I read your post and its so alarming. Have you seriously thought about what youre doing to your body? You can do irreversable damage to it and then what if something happens, something good, and you change your mind and its too late. Life is always changing, just hold on x