About to start a new role and I'm nervous...

SilentAndShy

Well-known member
#1
So, unbeknown to all at work, I suffer from anxiety (I hide it well, hence why many people say I'm calm on the outside) and get really anxious in some situations when it comes to talking in groups, or confronting difficult people and situations.

Now, I've accepted a role that will see me line manage people and I'm apprehensive about it. Specifically, as in my in-tray, I've got an issue (relating to timekeeping and the lack of focus of two younger members of staff - teenagers!) that I've been advised I need to discuss first and set the tempo without burning my bridges as I will be working with these two going forward as I have been for a year or so.

I just fear I will end up raising the topic in a way that I will stumble my words, stutter or that they will be able to stump me with a response. I'm aware I need to show the carrot and the stick - later - if necessary.

I took on the role because I felt my qualities of helpfulness would enhance me but now I'm beginning to be worried tackling these issues - I'm trying to read articles that will help me tackle this but I'm so angry by their lack of effort that I fear I will lose my composure rather than tackling the issue.
 

F0AM

Well-known member
#2
I just fear I will end up raising the topic in a way that I will stumble my words, stutter or that they will be able to stump me with a response. now I'm beginning to be worried tackling these issues -
Don't let SA cloud your mind, Silent. As an expert in overthinking stuff and trying to avoid situations because of "what if" (even being worried for days prior to said event) i can tell you that 90% of the time things aren't as bad as we thought they would be. An probably those things you're afraid of won't even happen.

does that happen to you a lot? if that's the case, shouldn't your coworkers be used to it by now?

stump me with a response
Like for example...?

I felt my qualities of helpfulness would enhance me
i'm sure they will : )

Maybe some here could give you an advice in regard of that particular work. Good luck Silent!
 

PeterO

Well-known member
#3
I can offer sympathy if nothing else. I have been with my company for a very long time and struggle with managing people -- I'm either too lenient or just don't interact with people. I've gotten better about it because now most of the people "under" me work remotely and so do I. I still feel awkward when I'm in the office with a bunch of people, even though I'm fairly well-liked (I think).
 
#4
Write all you are going to say to them down, and memorise it. Do it in point form if that is easier for you to memorise.

Think of all the possible responses they may say to you that you can come up with, and prepare your answers to them.

I would also think of this like you would if you were going to look after someone else's children for a day.
You have to guide them and make sure they behave properly while they are in your care - however you can't yell or show your anger, because they are not your children.
It is the same for work colleagues that you are managing. You have to make them "behave"- follow work protocol, but you have to do it in a civil way.
 

SilentAndShy

Well-known member
#5
does that happen to you a lot? if that's the case, shouldn't your coworkers be used to it by now?!
By stutter, I mean when I'm confronted by someone who might be raising his voice etc so if these colleagues feel threatened by my approach they might get abit testy..

Like for example...?!
They may point to another colleague, who has now left, who took advantage of lax timekeeping to take however long he wanted for his breaks, and they've picked up that bad habit
 
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