1 Less Sufferer

[N1LOY]

Hi experienced people!
I come to SPW very often, but decided to keep coming more, because it is the one thing I can relate to myself the most.

Only people who knows about my S.A.D. are (in order)
You (SPW) --> My English Teacher --> Doctor --> Parents --> Guidance Counselor

Oh ya, I am in High School. Sophomore. 15 years old. F*cked up my freshman and sophomore year, failed many subjects and been absent like 3/4 of the year. Want to go to one of the best colleges. 0 friends unless you count cousins and internet.

Parents - Me relationship: terrible.
Little Brother - Me relationship: terrible.
Relatives - Me relationship: terrible.
Over online: A+


Seems like doctor/parents or anyone else doesn't take this seriously. I mean I know I am suffering, and not for like one or two months, but for around 3-4 years! It's getting worse. The more I try to beat it, the more of it comes out. I told them about it, and it's like "Meh, you will be better" to them.

I decided to fuc* them and try to fix this by myself. Did so many research... figured my problem would be Selective mutism, which is the closest I have related to myself.

School...::
So there was a English presentation in my class last week, I was soooo nervous. Helped the people in my group and when I went in front of the class, every cell of me started to shake, my voice squeaked and I sounded HORRIBLE. I couldn't even pronounce the words properly. Just Horrible. I couldn't stop my legs from shaking, my body temp got like over 2k F. Face all red. Just remembering it makes me want to vomit. I know there were kids who laughed inside, but that really doesn't affect me. It's just my performance. sigh. There is another health project coming up in my class. I am already nervous. They will ask questions and I will be like that dumbf*ck again.


I used to be so friendly in 6th Grade, 7th Grade... but things just started change so fast that I don't even know what has triggered this inside of me. I saw things I didn't want to see, learned what I shouldn't have... judged what should be left to the God.


I don't want to be famous, popular, rich...just wiser. That's the only thing I ask to God. I am going to start my science research soon, but my schedule is terrible also... ohh man so much to talk about, letting all of this out feels nice. Ask me around I will reply.


So this thread will be dedicated to myself and effects of each one of your helps, I highly encourage you to make thread like this for yourself (perhaps I should transfer this to my blog)... I will come here often to check out. Write my life. Help me fix me.

 

[geekyloaner]

Hi experienced people!
I come to SPW very often, but decided to keep coming more, because it is the one thing I can relate to myself the most.

Only people who knows about my S.A.D. are (in order)
You (SPW) --> My English Teacher --> Doctor --> Parents --> Guidance Counselor

Oh ya, I am in High School. Sophomore. 15 years old. F*cked up my freshman and sophomore year, failed many subjects and been absent like 3/4 of the year. Want to go to one of the best colleges. 0 friends unless you count cousins and internet.

Parents - Me relationship: terrible.
Little Brother - Me relationship: terrible.
Relatives - Me relationship: terrible.
Over online: A+


Seems like doctor/parents or anyone else doesn't take this seriously. I mean I know I am suffering, and not for like one or two months, but for around 3-4 years! It's getting worse. The more I try to beat it, the more of it comes out. I told them about it, and it's like "Meh, you will be better" to them.

I decided to fuc* them and try to fix this by myself. Did so many research... figured my problem would be Selective mutism, which is the closest I have related to myself.

School...::
So there was a English presentation in my class last week, I was soooo nervous. Helped the people in my group and when I went in front of the class, every cell of me started to shake, my voice squeaked and I sounded HORRIBLE. I couldn't even pronounce the words properly. Just Horrible. I couldn't stop my legs from shaking, my body temp got like over 2k F. Face all red. Just remembering it makes me want to vomit. I know there were kids who laughed inside, but that really doesn't affect me. It's just my performance. sigh. There is another health project coming up in my class. I am already nervous. They will ask questions and I will be like that dumbf*ck again.


I used to be so friendly in 6th Grade, 7th Grade... but things just started change so fast that I don't even know what has triggered this inside of me. I saw things I didn't want to see, learned what I shouldn't have... judged what should be left to the God.


I don't want to be famous, popular, rich...just wiser. That's the only thing I ask to God. I am going to start my science research soon, but my schedule is terrible also... ohh man so much to talk about, letting all of this out feels nice. Ask me around I will reply.


So this thread will be dedicated to myself and effects of each one of your helps, I highly encourage you to make thread like this for yourself (perhaps I should transfer this to my blog)... I will come here often to check out. Write my life. Help me fix me.

I also have had SP since i was a freshman failed a lot and just couldn't get any friends. I felt the same way I learned to try to deal with it myself, but it keeps failing over and over even with help until recently (i figured out how to talk to my brain sounds weird it answers too and now. Sadly I was so scared when I had to go in the military for college that I ended up admitting that I was a person who committed a crime but didn't do it stupid me and my SP I couldn't be in the room with the four people investigating (tiny room) me then I told them I did it and made it up. Never told anyone that before I quit the navy after prison they were never going to discharge me because no one was hurt and later found out it was faulty wiring on an old ship. So I went to prison for nothing and asked for a discharge. I'm 24 years old now and can't hold a steady job, but have forced my body into a heart attack it feels like everyday just going to college even now by myself with just me and my dog I still am fearful of the outside but the difference is I don't believe in god I found that out along the way. I found this site out late if you ever need a listener I am more then happy to lend a ear while allowing my self to be free on this site. You are a human we all have problems try not to beat yourself up I know I did. be muted at home and such until you feel comfortable and let your real self run wild on here you are what you are and will change with time and keep on dreaming and wishing never stop. Atheist aren't the devil just think differently.

 

[Feathers]

Hey N1LOY!

Well, I think you're BRAVE to have gone ahead for that presentation!!
It's a learning process, a little tiny baby doesn't learn to walk splendidly right away, and giving good or great presentations is a skill that you can learn too!!
Some of the best public speakers in history were REALLY very bad first!! And they put effort into improving and practising, and got better!!

The most important tip is that you know your material well and rehearse it at home.. Maybe even in front of a mirror, or just silently in your room, or even record yourself on computer or mp3 recorder or even old tape cassette recorder, depending what gear you have...
And that ideally it's interesting to you and you're enthusiastic about it..
There are some old threads about presentations on this forum too, maybe you can do a search?

Many people get 'awkward' in the teenage years, and many stumble across stuff they rather wouldn't... (I did too, alas.. messed me up a bit too, maybe..) And there can be other factors.. Like rebellion to parents or environment or other things maybe.. Maybe some of it is hormonal too... I got quieter in teenage years too.. Didn't know how to talk to people in high school at all, for a long time.. Until I read some books that helped me a lot..
Sorry to hear you couldn't get them in the library. Is there a used book shop near you or could you or a relative/friend/acquaintance look on eBay or Amazon? Have you found the online program 'Step by Step'? You can find it by Googling.. People talk about it here: http://www.socialphobiaworld.com/fo...overcoming-social-anxiety-step-by-step-28360/

You know people don't magically know what you've read or stumbled across, or what you have experienced.. Or what's on your mind or what your worries are... Unlike on TV, very few (or NONE) have telepathic abilities, most can't even figure out how you feel, and they may get the reasons for that totally wrong.. For example, they may think you're quiet because you don't like'em or because you had a bad day or that you're just a quiet and calm or peaceful person...

15 can be a very difficult age... Not really a kid anymore, not an adult yet.. For many people it can be very difficult.. It is a time of learning and changing..
Sorry to hear parents and teachers and other people haven't been more helpful.. Maybe they were of more 'quiet' type too, and thought the idea is to just 'brave it'..

It's good that you decided to work on this and fix things!!

GL, your story reads like a novel, almost! oh gosh! Have you thought about writing it and selling it to Hollywood maybe? (Maybe in fictionalized story?) Maybe you could even sue them (with a good lawyer?) ha! Did you get any compensantion for that time in prison without real reason?

Sorry to hear about it - though it's great you are brave and going to college now and it's good that you have a dog!! It sounds like you can go and start a whole new life!

 

[N1LOY]

I also have had SP since i was a freshman failed a lot and just couldn't get any friends. I felt the same way I learned to try to deal with it myself, but it keeps failing over and over even with help until recently (i figured out how to talk to my brain sounds weird it answers too and now. Sadly I was so scared when I had to go in the military for college that I ended up admitting that I was a person who committed a crime but didn't do it stupid me and my SP I couldn't be in the room with the four people investigating (tiny room) me then I told them I did it and made it up. Never told anyone that before I quit the navy after prison they were never going to discharge me because no one was hurt and later found out it was faulty wiring on an old ship. So I went to prison for nothing and asked for a discharge. I'm 24 years old now and can't hold a steady job, but have forced my body into a heart attack it feels like everyday just going to college even now by myself with just me and my dog I still am fearful of the outside but the difference is I don't believe in god I found that out along the way. I found this site out late if you ever need a listener I am more then happy to lend a ear while allowing my self to be free on this site. You are a human we all have problems try not to beat yourself up I know I did. be muted at home and such until you feel comfortable and let your real self run wild on here you are what you are and will change with time and keep on dreaming and wishing never stop. Atheist aren't the devil just think differently.

I talk inside myself. Haha is that what you meant by talking to brain?
Thanks for the advice.

The problem with atheism is like the witch trial, guilty until proven. There is no God unless there is a proof of God. Why not turn it around? I would love to get into a belief debate, but not worth it ATM with my anxiety freak show inside.

Hey N1LOY!

Well, I think you're BRAVE to have gone ahead for that presentation!!
It's a learning process, a little tiny baby doesn't learn to walk splendidly right away, and giving good or great presentations is a skill that you can learn too!!
Some of the best public speakers in history were REALLY very bad first!! And they put effort into improving and practising, and got better!!

The most important tip is that you know your material well and rehearse it at home.. Maybe even in front of a mirror, or just silently in your room, or even record yourself on computer or mp3 recorder or even old tape cassette recorder, depending what gear you have...
And that ideally it's interesting to you and you're enthusiastic about it..
There are some old threads about presentations on this forum too, maybe you can do a search?

Many people get 'awkward' in the teenage years, and many stumble across stuff they rather wouldn't... (I did too, alas.. messed me up a bit too, maybe..) And there can be other factors.. Like rebellion to parents or environment or other things maybe.. Maybe some of it is hormonal too... I got quieter in teenage years too.. Didn't know how to talk to people in high school at all, for a long time.. Until I read some books that helped me a lot..
Sorry to hear you couldn't get them in the library. Is there a used book shop near you or could you or a relative/friend/acquaintance look on eBay or Amazon? Have you found the online program 'Step by Step'? You can find it by Googling.. People talk about it here: http://www.socialphobiaworld.com/fo...overcoming-social-anxiety-step-by-step-28360/

You know people don't magically know what you've read or stumbled across, or what you have experienced.. Or what's on your mind or what your worries are... Unlike on TV, very few (or NONE) have telepathic abilities, most can't even figure out how you feel, and they may get the reasons for that totally wrong.. For example, they may think you're quiet because you don't like'em or because you had a bad day or that you're just a quiet and calm or peaceful person...

15 can be a very difficult age... Not really a kid anymore, not an adult yet.. For many people it can be very difficult.. It is a time of learning and changing..
Sorry to hear parents and teachers and other people haven't been more helpful.. Maybe they were of more 'quiet' type too, and thought the idea is to just 'brave it'..

It's good that you decided to work on this and fix things!!

GL, your story reads like a novel, almost! oh gosh! Have you thought about writing it and selling it to Hollywood maybe? (Maybe in fictionalized story?) Maybe you could even sue them (with a good lawyer?) ha! Did you get any compensantion for that time in prison without real reason?

Hola Feathers, I have another presentation coming up and I want to do better. I mean I do practice by myself a little, I do perfectly fine by myself, but when I get in front of the class, EVERYTHING changes.


That thread is dead. Those steps/tutorials might work for some people, but I don't think it will work for me. I think this phobia depends on individuals differently. I will take a look at it. All I know is, I hate getting attention, those eyes... I don't like them. Sometime I wish I could wear a sun-glass and block my ears so the world will be blind and silent.

People probably think I am a depressed teen, suffering through a loads of "s#it"...or probably don't know how to speak English, socially awkward kid, not interesting, not worth to spend time with, less friendly, scary, dresses out of the world (not fashion friendly), looks like s#it. When I smile at them they smile back (probably a psychological response to make me feel better)...I know that fake smile lol, because I have done it a LOT. I do get depressed and get over quickly, that's just the kind of person I am.

Exactly, they were totally not worth to talk to. They said words like for motivation and time management, I don't need them ATM. I know I am messy, out of schedule, failing grades, lazy... but I know myself more than any others. I have done it before, I can do it again.

My motivation and goals change over time, today I want to fix my SP, next day I want to fix my grades or work on my website. I can't stick to one thing. Thanks again Feathers for your wonderful advices!

 

[Feathers]

Hey N1LOY, glad to hear if any of it was of help!

Yeah, these things can be pretty individual.. What you think about the audience is important, yup.. You can try to change your opinion/view on that or focus on the message - if the message is more important you can sometimes 'tune out' the rest..
(If the presentation is about boring things, you can try to figure out if there are ways how to make it more interesting tho..)

That thread is dead. Those steps/tutorials might work for some people, but I don't think it will work for me. I think this phobia depends on individuals differently. I will take a look at it. All I know is, I hate getting attention, those eyes... I don't like them. Sometime I wish I could wear a sun-glass and block my ears so the world will be blind and silent.

Well, some people resurrect old threads all the time So you can ask stuff in an old thread or 'bump' it and maybe new info will be added..

People probably think I am a depressed teen, suffering through a loads of "s#it"...or probably don't know how to speak English, socially awkward kid, not interesting, not worth to spend time with, less friendly, scary, dresses out of the world (not fashion friendly), looks like s#it. When I smile at them they smile back (probably a psychological response to make me feel better)...I know that fake smile lol, because I have done it a LOT. I do get depressed and get over quickly, that's just the kind of person I am.

So am I right that when you attempted or started your presentation you have been distracted with thoughts like that?

Even if people thought all these things, so what?? 'emo' is 'cool' in some places... and in some schools, people like that are considered 'cool'!! even in RL, if you think about it.. some of the biggest 'geeks' are billionaires now!! like Bill Gates or the guy who created Facebook...? Have you seen the movie?

In movies, some of the most interesting kids are 'loners'... and sometimes they are not approached because other people might be a bit, err, intimidated by them, or might think they don't want their company or something - not because they wouldn't consider them worth spending time with!! For example, there are people I like, but have been too intimidated to speak with them even when they were alone, because I thought they were way cooler than me - if that makes sense?

And in high school, when I was too shy to say hello to one classmate, she later told me she was insulted that I didn't say hi to her! She thought I was 'above' her or something! (when I said hi to some other classmate who seemed 'safer' and more friendly/reassuring, and sat closer to me lol) Some people can mistake 'shy' for 'arrogant' or 'snobby' or feeling 'above them' or such!

In the first two years of high school I almost didn't talk to anyone except those who initiated conversation with me, but then I read a book or a few and purposely decided to change my behavior and started saying hi to people and smiling and joined the drama group etc. (which was scary at first, but turned out well, as my social circle 'widened'... and people saw me in a different way..)

If they really hated you they probably wouldn't smile back.. even if it's a psychological response, most people don't smile at people they really dislike!!

Depression is something you can work on, fashion sense too.. or you can just be proudly independent - in a few years what you are wearing will probably become fashionable (again?) anyway!! You could maybe even get a relative or acquaintance/friend or some helpful website to help with the fashion sense..? (some people just have good consultants, or an older sister who picks clothes etc.)
Some people can even think you are COOL because you don't think about fashion and are not intimidated by it!!

If it helps, and if you wear glasses, maybe it could be easier if you just didn't have glasses on when presenting? (Then you kinda wouldn't see faces so clearly, it'd be all a blur.. This is something that I noticed when on stage, it was actually helpful to not see people lol) Or you could maybe look with your eyes so that it's like a blur? (It's like changing focus on a camera or binocular..) Or just look at people's hair or clothes - or noses? ears? any 'harmless' bodyparts instead of their eyes? (Not the female parts or that will make them embarassed!!) Or think of their faces like cream pies? Or you could imagine their eyes changing color like in anime maybe?

Most people are bored at any presentations anyway, so even if it would be Brad Pitt there they would probably yawn or make 'fake smiles'... (or have even more fake smiles trying to look good to him?! hm!) You can work on the delivery and ask a question now and then, so that it gets their attention.. Or include some fun stuff or humor (though that can be tricky if you don't know them that well..)
Just don't expect too much from yourself or them.. Just to 'survive' it... And the focus on what a relief it will be afterwards..

Or you could imagine a 'shield' between them and you? You are right, these things can be very individual, it's important to find something that works for YOU!

Or maybe imagine them like a 'sea'? Or 'sand dunes'...? Whatever works best for your imagination!!

Maybe they also do a 'fake smile' thing if they're depressed themselves? hmpf? something to think about!!

My motivation and goals change over time, today I want to fix my SP, next day I want to fix my grades or work on my website. I can't stick to one thing. Thanks again Feathers for your wonderful advices!

You sound like you might be a scanner, a person with many interests... also sometimes called 'Jack of all trades' or 'Renaissance person'.. Barbara Sher has written a book Refuse to Choose for people like that, it was helpful to read it..

I've often been accused of being 'lazy' too when usually I was just not that motivated (or was angry), and then managed to accomplish most things too.. at least in school.. in RL that can be a bit harder, and learning about time management etc can actually be helpful. Overwhelm/upset/emotional management is even more important tho... (and there's info online and in books for overwhelm management too..)

I think it's important to not get into 'one track mind' where you leave all else aside - I can be like that too, and hyperfocus on things too, it can be ADD-ish behavior too.. So I'm consciously trying to learn to not get sucked into 'one track mind'...
If you know how long your interests last, you can work with that.. I think it would be a shame if you put ALL your effort into fighting SP now, and then realize you're all cured but without a high school diploma or such..

Think of it like 'juggling' different things... It's unlikely you'd be cured of all SA in one week, it may take a few months or a few years even, and it's good to work on other things inbetween too... Starting a website and learning to monetize it while you're still young may be good too.. Again, it can take a few months or even a year or a few..
It's important you don't spend too much time in front of computer either, there was a study that more than 5 hours a day makes you depressed and causes memory/concentration problems! So some kind of balance is ideal.. to work toward..

Some foods or food additives can cause ADD-ish behavior or depression/anxiety too, so it's good to stay away from those! (I just saw a great BBC show on that the other day, a guy was suicidal as long as he was eating some shrimp crackers with some food color, when he stopped, he stopped being suicidal and depressed!!) It was like: WOW!

So, hoping things get better for you too!! Fingers crossed for ya!!

 

[N1LOY]

Hey N1LOY, glad to hear if any of it was of help!

Yeah, these things can be pretty individual.. What you think about the audience is important, yup.. You can try to change your opinion/view on that or focus on the message - if the message is more important you can sometimes 'tune out' the rest..
(If the presentation is about boring things, you can try to figure out if there are ways how to make it more interesting tho..)

It's a health project, group work. Hopefully someone in our group will cheer the class. I mean I could do it also, but you know SAD... and it's almost end of the year if I do something stupid they will think of me differently.

So am I right that when you attempted or started your presentation you have been distracted with thoughts like that?

Yes you are very right. When I talk to the class, I am not thinking what I am saying... and my confidence flies in the sky. Voice shakes so much, it's terrible. Other girls can do better than me. This is embarrassing.

Even if people thought all these things, so what?? 'emo' is 'cool' in some places... and in some schools, people like that are considered 'cool'!! even in RL, if you think about it.. some of the biggest 'geeks' are billionaires now!! like Bill Gates or the guy who created Facebook...? Have you seen the movie?

I am not emo. xD I hate attention, just purely hate it. But I don't mind paying it to someone. I know I tell it to myself that all the time... so what if they think of me like that.. but when I see people's faces, everything changes. Blood just boils in my head.

In movies, some of the most interesting kids are 'loners'... and sometimes they are not approached because other people might be a bit, err, intimidated by them, or might think they don't want their company or something - not because they wouldn't consider them worth spending time with!! For example, there are people I like, but have been too intimidated to speak with them even when they were alone, because I thought they were way cooler than me - if that makes sense?

I hope that's the case. But I am no way cooler than those rich kids/football kids, haha.

And in high school, when I was too shy to say hello to one classmate, she later told me she was insulted that I didn't say hi to her! She thought I was 'above' her or something! (when I said hi to some other classmate who seemed 'safer' and more friendly/reassuring, and sat closer to me lol) Some people can mistake 'shy' for 'arrogant' or 'snobby' or feeling 'above them' or such!

Ya, teachers are mostly like that. They say like some people have no manners of saying hi and hello.

I am not arrogant, I always feel empty, no confidence or motivation. But I have tons of goals, and to finish them, that's where motivation kicks in.

In the first two years of high school I almost didn't talk to anyone except those who initiated conversation with me, but then I read a book or a few and purposely decided to change my behavior and started saying hi to people and smiling and joined the drama group etc. (which was scary at first, but turned out well, as my social circle 'widened'... and people saw me in a different way..)

I like the shy part of a girl. It's attractive to me for some odd reason. But ladies don't like that in guys. People tend to think it's natural for girls, but not for boys. Even if I say hi or hello, the next five minutes goes really awkward silence.

Depression is something you can work on, fashion sense too.. or you can just be proudly independent - in a few years what you are wearing will probably become fashionable (again?) anyway!! You could maybe even get a relative or acquaintance/friend or some helpful website to help with the fashion sense..? (some people just have good consultants, or an older sister who picks clothes etc.)
Some people can even think you are COOL because you don't think about fashion and are not intimidated by it!!

I have sense of fashion, but why would I do that. To impress people? No thanks. I tend to avoid attention. But I guess I should have a modest one, not too attractive, not too cheesy. I don't want to be normal, just like another kid in school. Their dress code is sooooo similar, skinny jeans, disney hairstyles (lmao). I know I am different than them, not on (high) status. But as in general. The way I think is totally out of the box and most of the time I keep to myself. Sometime I make jokes and laugh it by myself. Is that a sad thing? hahaha xD. I don't mind though.

If it helps, and if you wear glasses, maybe it could be easier if you just didn't have glasses on when presenting? (Then you kinda wouldn't see faces so clearly, it'd be all a blur.. This is something that I noticed when on stage, it was actually helpful to not see people lol) Or you could maybe look with your eyes so that it's like a blur? (It's like changing focus on a camera or binocular..) Or just look at people's hair or clothes - or noses? ears? any 'harmless' bodyparts instead of their eyes? (Not the female parts or that will make them embarassed!!) Or think of their faces like cream pies? Or you could imagine their eyes changing color like in anime maybe?

If I wear glasses then how would I be able to read off the paper? Haha Hmm nice tips, I will try that.

You know the problem is, I get so hype that I will change tomorrow, be a better person and the moment I wake up in the morning everything resets. The moment I get in front of people, I forget everything.

Most people are bored at any presentations anyway, so even if it would be Brad Pitt there they would probably yawn or make 'fake smiles'... (or have even more fake smiles trying to look good to him?! hm!) You can work on the delivery and ask a question now and then, so that it gets their attention.. Or include some fun stuff or humor (though that can be tricky if you don't know them that well..)
Just don't expect too much from yourself or them.. Just to 'survive' it... And the focus on what a relief it will be afterwards..

I will try that.

Or you could imagine a 'shield' between them and you? You are right, these things can be very individual, it's important to find something that works for YOU!

Or maybe imagine them like a 'sea'? Or 'sand dunes'...? Whatever works best for your imagination!!

Maybe they also do a 'fake smile' thing if they're depressed themselves? hmpf? something to think about!!

Haha nice ones. Hmm.. that could be also.

You sound like you might be a scanner, a person with many interests... also sometimes called 'Jack of all trades' or 'Renaissance person'.. Barbara Sher has written a book Refuse to Choose for people like that, it was helpful to read it..

I have multi-talents, I am good in almost anything, but not "best" at anything.
I can pick up almost anything quickly.

I've often been accused of being 'lazy' too when usually I was just not that motivated (or was angry), and then managed to accomplish most things too.. at least in school.. in RL that can be a bit harder, and learning about time management etc can actually be helpful. Overwhelm/upset/emotional management is even more important tho... (and there's info online and in books for overwhelm management too..)

I can't help myself much. Parents are really acting weird, teachers calling home... just nothing goes right in my world.

I think it's important to not get into 'one track mind' where you leave all else aside - I can be like that too, and hyperfocus on things too, it can be ADD-ish behavior too.. So I'm consciously trying to learn to not get sucked into 'one track mind'...
If you know how long your interests last, you can work with that.. I think it would be a shame if you put ALL your effort into fighting SP now, and then realize you're all cured but without a high school diploma or such..

Think of it like 'juggling' different things... It's unlikely you'd be cured of all SA in one week, it may take a few months or a few years even, and it's good to work on other things inbetween too... Starting a website and learning to monetize it while you're still young may be good too.. Again, it can take a few months or even a year or a few..
It's important you don't spend too much time in front of computer either, there was a study that more than 5 hours a day makes you depressed and causes memory/concentration problems! So some kind of balance is ideal.. to work toward..

Some foods or food additives can cause ADD-ish behavior or depression/anxiety too, so it's good to stay away from those! (I just saw a great BBC show on that the other day, a guy was suicidal as long as he was eating some shrimp crackers with some food color, when he stopped, he stopped being suicidal and depressed!!) It was like: WOW!

Yep definitely. I will try as you suggested. I don't find my limits. Once I set my goal, I achieve it no matter what. It just happens. Someone called me a perfectionist once, I didn't know if I would take it as a compliment or insult. But both fit my description.

Computer is really messing me up. I need to find other ways to entertain myself. Need to spend less time on youtube. We don't even have cable in our T.V., probably that's why I have been too much into computer.

Whoah shrimp - > Suicidal, damn! That's not good for him. How would I know when food affects me?

So, hoping things get better for you too!! Fingers crossed for ya!!

Thank you Feathers! You are awesome!

 

[bigcat1967]

I have a whole session on self-hypnosis if you are interested. Just pm me.

 

[missjesss]

you poor thing! I remember what it was like being 15 !! high school is hard especially having a social phobia..

The main thing u need to do is accept yourself fully, you should also learn some cbt and I highly recommend going to see a hypnotherapist cbt helped with my irrational thoughts and self sabotage but hypnotherapy released that feeling of fear inside of me ... I still have a little way to go but I have recovered so much since I used to get waves of panic attacks all day long!

If you expect to become a social butterfly then you are fishing to high because I think most people who develop social phobia might be a bit introverted and naturally have a quiet and reserved temperament however if you seek treatment now you will be way ahead of me at 22 !!!!!!!!!! good luck