Hi.
Is it really agoraphobia when someone does go out daily? I seem to be suffering from this terrible disorder, but I do go out on a daily basis, since I have no other choice but to starve.
But most days, it is simply horrible. I`m not going to describe the feelings I experience, I am guessing everyone on this forum knows what I am talking about.
I should also mention that there was a time when I took the train and traveled to another city by myself. I was scared at first, but what kept me going was the fact that I kept thinking how much I hated the place where Iwas living at the time, and how being on that train was the only way to change that.
Also, last year, after many failed attempts, I did manage to go to the mall and enjoy a normal shopping session, like normal people. I had a few of those, then summer came and I got scared of going out again, because of the unglodly heat.
Now I kind of seesaw back and forth between days where it`s not that terrible to go to the supermarket, which is a couple of blocks over, and feeling like I`d rather cut off an arm than have to go through that panic again.
I don`t understand what happened to me. I used to enjoy going out, being outside. I even used to walk to the other side of the city to see my friends, and it`s a pretty big city.
Then life happened and I experienced disappointment after disappointment and I took to keeping to myself for the most part. I stopped going out and one day I realized I was scared of being outside. There were no physical symptoms, just a thought that Ishould head back home or else I might get a panic attack in public.
I forgot to mention I`ve been tortured by panic attacks,on and off, for almost a decade now.
I am scared to be outside, not necessarily because I`ll get a panic attack, I can handle those. What terrifies me is the idea that others will see me having one and I`ll embarras myself.
Another thing I`ve noticed is that I invite, as nuts as this sounds, the fear of being outside to come to me, even before I am outside, and that`s because at least this way, there`s no chance it will attack when I least expect it.
My mother says I simply do not want to get out of this situation. She says she experienced the same thing, but that she had no choice but to go to work, and that`s how she overcame it.
My former therapiest, when I told her about my problem, told me to "stop acting like a scared child and start acting like an adult." She also said I was keeping myself in prison and that it was up to me to overcome this.
I read recently that agoraphobia never goes away completely and this terrified me. I NEED to find a way to make it dissapear. I have wishes, dreams, things I want to accomplish.
Is it really agoraphobia when someone does go out daily? I seem to be suffering from this terrible disorder, but I do go out on a daily basis, since I have no other choice but to starve.
But most days, it is simply horrible. I`m not going to describe the feelings I experience, I am guessing everyone on this forum knows what I am talking about.
I should also mention that there was a time when I took the train and traveled to another city by myself. I was scared at first, but what kept me going was the fact that I kept thinking how much I hated the place where Iwas living at the time, and how being on that train was the only way to change that.
Also, last year, after many failed attempts, I did manage to go to the mall and enjoy a normal shopping session, like normal people. I had a few of those, then summer came and I got scared of going out again, because of the unglodly heat.
Now I kind of seesaw back and forth between days where it`s not that terrible to go to the supermarket, which is a couple of blocks over, and feeling like I`d rather cut off an arm than have to go through that panic again.
I don`t understand what happened to me. I used to enjoy going out, being outside. I even used to walk to the other side of the city to see my friends, and it`s a pretty big city.
Then life happened and I experienced disappointment after disappointment and I took to keeping to myself for the most part. I stopped going out and one day I realized I was scared of being outside. There were no physical symptoms, just a thought that Ishould head back home or else I might get a panic attack in public.
I forgot to mention I`ve been tortured by panic attacks,on and off, for almost a decade now.
I am scared to be outside, not necessarily because I`ll get a panic attack, I can handle those. What terrifies me is the idea that others will see me having one and I`ll embarras myself.
Another thing I`ve noticed is that I invite, as nuts as this sounds, the fear of being outside to come to me, even before I am outside, and that`s because at least this way, there`s no chance it will attack when I least expect it.
My mother says I simply do not want to get out of this situation. She says she experienced the same thing, but that she had no choice but to go to work, and that`s how she overcame it.
My former therapiest, when I told her about my problem, told me to "stop acting like a scared child and start acting like an adult." She also said I was keeping myself in prison and that it was up to me to overcome this.
I read recently that agoraphobia never goes away completely and this terrified me. I NEED to find a way to make it dissapear. I have wishes, dreams, things I want to accomplish.
Last edited: