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Old 02-23-2011
Bethan Eirlys's Avatar
Newbie User

im 19 and for about 2 years ive had one best friend,
all my life ive been bullied from school even threw to my own siblings,
i cant make friends well as alot of shallow people judge me straigt away because im a large girl,
but ive always felt theres something wrong with me, as know one bar my only friend seems to like me.
is there something wrong with me?
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Old 02-23-2011
miss_amy's Avatar
Advanced User

Its more likely something wrong with them. Im sure you are a lovely person. So what if you are a curvy girl... big beautiful and curvatious, maybe they are jealous?
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Old 02-23-2011
ilmatross's Avatar
Advanced User

people are *******s. if you put forward an outward aura of abusability they will take advantage of you to feel better because most people are miserable

I have no friends, none i'd like to call friends anyway, which is probably similiar to everyone here on spw

welcome to the lonely club
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Old 02-23-2011
Phoenixx's Avatar
Elite User

Welcome Bethan I can tell you that there's nothing wrong with you. People can be so shallow minded judging others based solely on looks. Don't worry about what they say. As firewalk basically put it, they're just missing out on meeting an awesome person. Also, there's nothing wrong with being a curvy girl. I'm a little bit of a curvy girl too, and even though it's taken me a while, I'm finally happy with the curves I have. You should be too!
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Old 02-24-2011
Northern Lad's Avatar
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No i would say your doing what the bullies want loathing yourself. I can tell you now that the only thing your lacking is confidence in yourself and self esteem chin up lass your not alone.
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Old 02-24-2011
Deus_Ex_Lemur's Avatar
Elite User

A lot of it's in your head. I had and still have one best friend. I have other friends but not on a level of 100% trust as this one. For a while felt same way. I have protruding ears, that was my source of bullying and self-consciousness physically (well one of many physically lol).

A lot is what Northern Lad said. Low confidence, self-esteem, sad, negative energy can resonate to others.

But TRUST this lemur... there's NOTHING "wrong" with you. Nothing wrong with anyone with SA or Shy or have anything about them ppl bullied them about. BULLIES have things wrong with them!
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Old 03-08-2011
Surrogate's Avatar
Newbie User

Quality over quantity. (sorry if I'm being too materialistic here LOL)

No really though, it's better to have one or two best friends that value you highly, than to have a bunch of people who probably have just a 'little' connection with you.

Despite all teachings, most people do judge based on looks and first impressions, but you shouldn't be friends with them anyways if all they care about is your physical identity.
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Old 07-30-2011

i think those people suck; it's not fair that you have to go through that. if you want to talk to someone your age about it, there are online chat sessions on the Beyond Bullies website. they've been trained on how to deal with bullies, and how to help other people deal as well. it's pretty cool haha
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Old 10-03-2011

I am sorry to hear about your situation. In my opinion, you are using the excuse of been overweight for your bullying. Yet I am also overweight but while I have faced bullies in the past, my weight has never being an issue with weight, mainly because I am confident with my weight.

Now don't get me wrong, I am not saying this to put you down but help you. Bullies unfortunately are like predators and as such, they can smell weaknesses in others (or what they percieve as weaknesses). As you obviously don't hold yourself in a high regard, thinking that there is something wrong with you, bullies will sense this and see you as a target.

So what will I recommend? First of all, work on improving your self-esteem. I'm sure you have many good points and from your profile picture, I don't see you as being particularly fat or overweight. Anyhow like most females, you don't like your bodily image (I say that for if I had a $ for every female I have come across who dislikes the way she looks, I'd be a Millionaire)!

Hence try and build up your self-image, getting your esteem and worth from what really counts, who you are and not how you look (though as I said I think you look quite nice). Next stand up to the bullies in your life, be it siblings or others around you. You teach people how to treat you so when you start acting from position worth, 90% if not all of your bullies (who are emotionally stunted people anyhow) will cower away or simply be nice to you.

Hope this helps.
Author of Beat The Bully; A Guide To Dealing With Adult Bullying
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