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Old 10-23-2016

The weird part of all this talk is that now that I've been living with severe Fibromyalgia for the past bunch of years and I look at how this destroyed parts of my life. The physical and mental pain get extremely agonizing. I need to lay down for most of the day 8-10 hours worth. I lost my business. I had to move to another state in order to get medical care. I'm not even comparing this to the agonizing effects of HH. Somehow, I survived HH and now I'm in my upper 50's.

In my younger years of HH, I managed to have girlfriends, was married, have a wonderful adult child, had more girlfriends, ran social activity groups with dripping hands and yes it made me nervous.

I see that I'm repeating myself from my above post... but if that's what it takes, oh well.

My advice is "kill yourself" if that's what you feel is best. "Cry your brains out" if that's what you must do. The only people that will miss you are the people the closest to you within your life circle. Nobody will miss you here. Personally, I'm not giving up yet, but I surely will within the next 10 years if I must. In the meantime despite all my pain and sweat I will find love once again as I have done before and will continue to inspire as long as I have the inspiration in which to do so.

As far as hope for a better tomorrow.... there is none if you have already given up hope already. Unless you are my age or older, you haven't given yourself a chance yet. And, if you feel there is no chance left.... you know what to do.
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