How can you tell "internet friends" are REAL friendo's?

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I like you.And I may have been a bit mean to you also.

But yeah,you can consider you have room to manuveur with this old duck.

In other words,don't be scared to be real towards this old duck.

As for the effortless ones,the ones who can be truly zhitty because they pack an influential punch,might I advise that you watch films of wolf pack behaviour and you may begin to understand how someone can be so backwards yet keep moving forwards.

I don't really think there are "cliques" on here at the moment (I don't know about in the past)....there are only 'regular posters' and 'non regular posters'. Of course its easier to think of something to say to somebody if they post a lot, because you know more about them, but I think this is probably the one kind of forum where there wouldn't be cliques.

As for the trust thing, I get you. The absence of physical interaction DOES make it harder to tell who is genuine and who isn't. Personally I like to give everybody the benefit of the doubt because, well, it feels nicer that way. Though I know that can also be dangerous and that's why apart from my eye and my hand I won't post a picture of myself here on the forum, nor state where I live. For one thing, hundreds of 'guests' are trawling through here all the time. Guests a bit much like I was, when I found the site, before I ever considered that I may need to be "one of those people that takes part in internet forums".

I would gladly say I have found "friends" here, just a different type of friend to those I have in real life. Essentially, we're all here for the same reason - to find support for our social anxiety, and it's nice to be able to help one another. I think the key is to just not become too reliant on these people, and give away too many details, until you're more certain that they can be trusted, and how long that takes depends entirely on how long you've been chatting and the depth of your discussions.

Tino said:

Over the past few months I have been chatting to people and telling people personal details about myself, which I tend not to do in real life, nevermind on the internet, I have even posted pictures of myself on here, which I regret, and i've listened to peoples whinging, all with the idea in my head that this is how you "bond" with random strangers. I suppose you could call these months an experiment in loneliness repelling. So far it has not gone well and i've inadvertently made more dislike me than like me, i've had someone unfairly get personal and try to humiliate me, while everyone just laughed along(presumably because they are popular), and without meaning to be rude I come on this site(which i'm pathetically a bit addicted to) full of friendly people being friendly to other people in their cliques, telling eachother how wonderful they are and I wonder how everyone does it. As a result i'm feeling just as alienated as ever.

Looking back I have always been able to tell who genuinely likes me or doesn't like me by their body language and facial expressions, even if they talk to me alot I can tell if they just see me as someone disposable to pass the time with.

So to those that have internet friendo's, how can you trust these people when you can't see their body language? How can you tell if they respect you? And how do you know they see you as a friend rather than just some random joker on the web?

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I'm a bit confused about a few things you've said here. Firstly, I don't remember anyone trying to humiliate you (unless I missed that thread altogether) so I'm not sure what that refers to, but neither have I noticed these "cliques" you're referring to. I've also always had the impression that you are well liked here, and get along with quite a lot of people (one person in particular, though I won't name names) so I was surprised that you seem to feel otherwise.

As to your question about people making friends online, I suppose it's like in real life. I tend to be wary of people in general, but I think that I can recognise those people I do like pretty reliably. I'm not always right (just like in RL) and very recently made a huge error in judgment about what type of a person someone was, but that's always a risk. Some people are very good at hiding their true nature, but I think most people are pretty much what they appear to be, and friendships are like a lot of other things - you only get out what you put in.

I don't know how to tell when they're a real friend. i'll let you know the answer when i actually feel liked instead of feeling like i'm shoving myself into private conversations where i'm not wanted.

This may sound pretty useless, but I honestly believe the best way to know if an internet friend is a real friend is experience. Experience in person might help, but learning how it works on the internet requires experience as well. No one starts out being an excellent judge of character.