Being Extroverted with SA?

so i assume that there are many people who are very chatty and outgoing but suffer social anxiety.....at uni im a borderline mute....mainly because i dont like the sound of my voice and im just not confident with the course load so im always anxious, i think that its alot harder for a shy introverted SAer because an extroverted SAer can hide it and its not as exposed because people can assume you are very chatty and so its not as obvious that you would have SA......where as if your more of a shy person and you have it ,,its an absolute nightmare,

even at home with my family and friends i struggle to get a word in and i dont feel comfortable....actually i seem to struggle more at expressing myself and coming across as fun..i can be fun around my close friends but i find it difficult around close family because they know all my weaknesses and they are actually quite prejudice towards everyone in the family cirlce..

sure people will read this and think "here we go again, another unhelpful thread"....but its an interesting concept.

i just want to feel more comfortable with my thoughts..i find it hard to get the words out...especially around LOUD groups of people who are constantly joking around.....if i cant get a word in then i find any way i can to bail out, i feel like i have alot of issues to deal with.

does it really matter anyway?....im beginning to not care about these little hang ups as much now....in an FU to society sort of why...i think i always place everyone on a higher pedastal then myself, but i still find parties to be harrowing

i think that's the problem

Everything has to be fit into neat packages these days..


So hey if it sounds like this, it must be that..

While there are many forms of SA, i think there comes a time when people have to stop putting everything into Type A or Type B and so on.. Because in the end, it's not helping anybody.. We're just creating a nation/world where before somebody is born, "they have this problem."

God forbid letting people figure things out for themselves and maybe they won't wind up like that.. But telling somebody something that may or may not come to fruitition every day just leads to drugs and other problems.


If you can talk to anybody, be around anybody, have tons of friends, tons of conversations, mingle when at a large party, and so on, it really might not be that you have SA... It might be something else..

Too many things need to be put into neat little packages these days and in the end, doctors, governments, parents, drug makers and so on or so forth need to stop lumping everything into neat little packages..

Because telling somebody at 2 that they have ADD should never happen.

Who knows if you have SA or not, but if you are an extrovert and are comfortable around tons of people most of the time, then at the end of the day people will continue to believe SA or SP is bull..

Because if everybody can have SA, then it really isn't a problem. It becomes more of something people disregard. And that's why people don't understand it or care to..

That's why many people find psychology and the psychiatry to be filled with BS.... When you keep lumping tons of differnt people into Type A here and Type B there, many people just turn off because it becomes fake.

Things need to be defined..

Because if somebody who makes tons of friends, goes out in public on a daily basis, in comfortable around others most of the time, holds conversations most of the time is told they have SA.................

What will people without SA think of somebody who can't do any of those things....?

There is a reason why people don't always believe various psychological ailments are real... One reason is if there is no real way to determine what is what and what is not, why should people listen.

i must admit i cant make the equation of sa+ extroverted.

doesnt add up to me but it seems many are like that.

one of the mytery i guess...

I thought being extraverted means that you are energised by being around other people, and being introverted meant that you were energised by being alone. That's not to say that either class won't start to feel sick after too much of one or the other.

I always considered it possible for extraverts to have SA. There's a story on the website written by one here http://www.socialphobiaworld.com/modules.php?name=SP_Stories&pa=showpage&pid=10

Terms..

The problem is there are too many definitions for everything there is....

When people think of an introvert they are thinking of a shy person...
When they think of an extrovert, they are thinking of somebody who may never shut up..

Yeah most people are somewhere in the middle, but the biggest problem is that it is all one big drug sham half the time.

People make the terms and definitins so intertwinding that somebody who is introverted might also be extroverted.. It does nothing but confuse everybody and makes everybody believe they have every problem in the book.

Sa or SP is one problem..

A person who has no problem talking to people, a person who holds tons of conversations on a daily basis, a person who goes out by themselves to parties/clubs/events and makes new friends easily has either miraculous overcome SA/SP with drugs or Therapy or they really never had SA/SP in the first place.

I have social anexity and i am an extrovert, i think sometimes it helps because then people dont expect me to be scared

karmen said:

I have social anexity and i am an extrovert, i think sometimes it helps because then people dont expect me to be scared

Click to expand...

i would give anything to be that way..i think its just easier to be a talkative SAer ..people dont assume you have it and your not the wallflower at a party or gathering

I think it's really hard to be an extrovert with some of these types of anxieties because they almost seem mutually exclusive. I'm kind of in the middle - I've had friends, girlfriends, but it's always been kind of limited. By that I mean I'd have like two friends at most, and with my girlfriends we often couldn't do certain things - like going to bars or meeting her family would always rub me the wrong way. I'd do it, but it was always really grudgingly and if it was possible to skip on things like that, I did.

It's hard to get over that feeling of stepping on thin ice when you've got SA/SP and have to do anything social. A lot of us are also just so comfortable with being home. Honestly, being home alone is such a good feeling to me, it's the only time I can relax. I can listen to music, take a bath, not have to worry about anything or anyone. My place becomes a total sanctuary. Then you weigh that up with having to go out and be sociable and it's easy to forget the whole extrovert thing.

while reading this thread i realized, at last, what separates SA from SP. with SA you can be extroverted and convert anxiety to anger and aggressiveness while SP makes you afraid of things, and makes you avoid them, sometimes at all costs. i wonder if im on my way from SP to SA, and which is worse..

Sometimes i miss the way i used to be, for my whole life i was always the talkitive one , the funny one and i always wanted to be the center of attention, but since my facial blushing has gotten worse its made me queit down, essspecially at school. I'm still not shy or quiet but I always feell scared that I am going to start blushing.

karmen said:

I have social anexity and i am an extrovert, i think sometimes it helps because then people dont expect me to be scared

Click to expand...

well... that sounds good, what problems do you have then? I thought social anxiety is about not being able to speak in front of people...
So, you speak very much but are afraid what people will think of you?

Actually i got to know one person who had social anxiety and is still claims she has it, but she speaks all the time! even in front of a bigger group of strangers... easily expresses her opinion. Is that really social anxiety?
:?:

karmen said:

Sometimes i miss the way i used to be, for my whole life i was always the talkitive one , the funny one and i always wanted to be the center of attention, but since my facial blushing has gotten worse its made me queit down, essspecially at school. I'm still not shy or quiet but I always feell scared that I am going to start blushing.

Click to expand...

oh sorry i missed that post
It's like reading myself!!!! ahhhh i am the same! I'm funny and everyone likes me (of course if i didn't have sa, things would be like it in everyone's case), but i'm a really a person who loved being in center of attention and because of some phobias and especially blushing i became sooo damn shy... 8O
i understand you! :wink:

--

Now I'm confused. Does extrovert mean wanting to be talkative and gregarious or actually being like that.

Well I was writing about how being extroverted and having social anxiety was an oxymoron like other people have but then I realised I've met people who always seem edgy and nervous constantly checking peoples reactions and yet talk all the time too...
Would this be classified as social anxiety? Would it mean their anxiety wasn't as bad as those who stay quiet?

Anyway I think its impossible to say whether it'd be easier or harder being an extrovert with SA until you've been both. Maybe having to keep up confidant exterior would wear you down. The grass is always greener on the otherside and all that...

I'm still confused.