What to do when my friends/family can't hang out?

For the past few months I've been having problems with staving off being alone for long periods of time when my friends/family are busy and cannot hang out with me. It's gotten to the point where I'm 90% afraid to call my friends because I'm scared of being rejected, and when I am, my emotions plummet and I end up feeling really sad and alone. I'm still young, I still live with my mom and dad, but I tend to stay away from asking my dad to hang out because he works all the time leaving me with my mom. I do enjoy the time I can spend with my mom, girlfriend, grandparents, and other friends but as soon as they leave or I can't hang out with them again soon I start getting depressed and I end up being in my room on the computer or playing on my Xbox One. I don't have very many friends that I hang out with other than two or three of them that I usually rely on to hang out with. I just want to know how to stave off this loneliness because it kills me so much inside and I can't take being alone, I keep wondering "what am I gonna do with myself? I want to spend time with people."


On a side note I've had depression since 10th grade and while it's not as serious anymore, I still get depression attacks and I get depressed when I am alone for long periods of time (By long periods I mean hours in a day). While I say I am alone my mom is home about 75 to 80% of the time I just feel lonely and want to hang out with people.


Thank you for taking the time to read this and I'm glad I found this forum.

You just sound like a very extroverted person. So you need people around to feel stimulated. Nothing wrong with that at all, I think it's normal for a lot of extreme extroverts.

That said, I do think it's important to learn to enjoy alone time. There won't always be people around and that's just something you have to accept. It comes with time, I think.

Thanks for the reply, It's interesting to finally realize why I am like that, I didn't know extroverted was such a thing, I only knew of introverted. I have had alone time for as long as I can remember, from age 4 to now, being an only child didn't make things much easier for me so that's why I feel I developed being extroverted and clingy to friends and family. I constantly want to make them feel like hanging out with me is the best thing ever, I always offer my friends dinner, lunch, going somewhere so they will want to come back real soon. You are right in saying accepting being alone does come with time but it has been a struggle lately and I think my depression partially comes into play when that happens. I guess it just upsets me that I can't spend as much time with my friends as before high school hit. Now all of a sudden my best friend I knew since pre-school barely talks to me, got wisked into music production, running a Minecraft server, and going up to Canada to see his girlfriend. We'd always talk on Skype after school, play Minecraft, Runescape etc. But now my mint condition headset sits on top of my computer and never moves sadly.

I feel like all my friends and family are "fading away" from my life. They get caught up with things and they end up being busy a lot. My uncle I used to always laugh with and hang out with is now married and works almost everyday, my grandparents are always doing something, my friends are busy or never answer my messages, and my mom always seems to be going to appointments and doing things with her friends, I don't even bother with my dad because he's working all the time. I guess you could say I feel like I'm being disconnected with the people I used to be connected with and I don't know what to do. I don't want to lose everything and I don't want to see my friends leave, I'm terrified of it!

What I do is say to myself "well what a surprise!"
Seriously, nearly every time I want to hang out with someone they're too busy. "I'm doing stuff with my wife." "I'm doing stuff with my kid." "A blah blah blah"

Metal_isthe_Answer said:

What I do is say to myself "well what a surprise!"
Seriously, nearly every time I want to hang out with someone they're too busy. "I'm doing stuff with my wife." "I'm doing stuff with my kid." "A blah blah blah"

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I feel your pain. It's like that with my friends, and my family, just today I got turned down by my friend. Ended up playing Dead Rising 3 most of the day. I understand people can be busy sometimes but why does it feel so consistent that they are occupied with other things and cannot hang out?

OP-how old are you??you will find as you grow older, your friends will generally dirt apart from you as they get girlfriends, jobs etc etc..it happens with everyone unless you make it a priority to keep in contact with each other but it has to be two-sided...you cant be the only one reaching out or else id let that friend go..ive had many friends go away as i just cant or dont have the desire or energy to maintain relationships with them..im much more on the introverted side..

bsammy said:

OP-how old are you??you will find as you grow older, your friends will generally dirt apart from you as they get girlfriends, jobs etc etc..it happens with everyone unless you make it a priority to keep in contact with each other but it has to be two-sided...you cant be the only one reaching out or else id let that friend go..ive had many friends go away as i just cant or dont have the desire or energy to maintain relationships with them..im much more on the introverted side..

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17 going on 18 soon, my friends are the same age as me, some are 18, my girlfriend is 18. My best friend has a girlfriend all the way up in Canada, my younger uncle (my other best friend, about a month younger than me) is into music a lot and is busy often. My mom is busy most of the time too. I do keep in touch with all my friends, some are at my school, most at my old school, but my old school is in the same town I live in so I'm not far from them at all. I can literally be at their house in 10 minutes.

jerahme04 said:

Find a hobby. Study something. Improve the quality of your life. I like to use my alone time to pursue knowledge.

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I do have some hobbies: I like to assemble model planes but I don't have the funds to spend a lot on modelling supplies and drive an hour to the hobby store, I like flying and also airsoft, but I don't really have a lot of people to play that with unless someone's over. Occasionally I'll read my Private Pilot Manual at night before bed, that's about it. Other than that I'll just browse YouTube, play Xbox One, or on the computer.