Why can’t I express feelings?

andsorry

Well-known member
:crying:The people in my life get upset or annoyed when I say I’m not happy. They think my life is effortless, but it’s not. When I try and express that I’m depressed, I’m met with anger. They’re like what do you have to be depressed about and you’re pretty and young you’ll meet someone and get over this. I feel so miserable and I haven’t left the house in days. In some way I don’t feel like I’m allowed to be human.
 

FriendlyShadow

Well-known member
:crying:The people in my life get upset or annoyed when I say I’m not happy. They think my life is effortless, but it’s not. When I try and express that I’m depressed, I’m met with anger. They’re like what do you have to be depressed about and you’re pretty and young you’ll meet someone and get over this. I feel so miserable and I haven’t left the house in days. In some way I don’t feel like I’m allowed to be human.



Hey there andsorry. I can definitely relate to this passage you've written. I feel like I disappointed my family all because of my social disorder. I keep saying to myself I hate myself and I felt I was responsible for not trying to make the perfect effort into being a better version of myself. Of course, my father says I should stop blaming myself and if I keep it up it will be my fault. Well, already he just spoke the truth to that and it doesn't help much either. I know my family cares about me and want me to have a good life, but it's not actually helping when they continuously make insensitive remarks, being non understanding, speaking their opinions for me, and trying to manipulate to be a certain way that I couldn't have become. Sorry, but I just can't do that.
 

andsorry

Well-known member
Hey there andsorry. I can definitely relate to this passage you've written. I feel like I disappointed my family all because of my social disorder. I keep saying to myself I hate myself and I felt I was responsible for not trying to make the perfect effort into being a better version of myself. Of course, my father says I should stop blaming myself and if I keep it up it will be my fault. Well, already he just spoke the truth to that and it doesn't help much either. I know my family cares about me and want me to have a good life, but it's not actually helping when they continuously make insensitive remarks, being non understanding, speaking their opinions for me, and trying to manipulate to be a certain way that I couldn't have become. Sorry, but I just can't do that.

My mom made me feel bad. After comparing me with everyone whom she considered had real problems she basically told me I was a burden. I feel like crying, but even I can't do that right now. I feel so guilty for even having feelings.
 

Capsaicin

Well-known member
People tend to be emotion-driven and sensitive, so hearing and being around things that are depressing or people who are depressed throws off their groove. They'll often resist or try to change it.
 
My mom made me feel bad. After comparing me with everyone whom she considered had real problems she basically told me I was a burden. I feel like crying, but even I can't do that right now. I feel so guilty for even having feelings.

If people don't acknowledge that there is a problem, then that relieves them of any responsibility to show compassion and help.

It sounds like your mother does not want to help you, so she is mininmising or pretending you don't have one.
Is there anyone else outside your family that you can express your feelings about being depressed with that will be willing to help, like a counsellor?
 
I can kind of relate to how you're feeling... I have to keep it a secret that I'm getting help for depression because my family just can't understand. If I even mention it in the slightest I'm met with anger and yelling :/ My mum thinks the whole idea is ridiculous and if I got a full-time job and worked my *** off then I wouldn't have time to think about this and that. If I worked hard enough then I would be tired at night and not suffer from insomnia. So basically... I have brought it upon myself and there is nothing at all bad in my life because I'm just a child and know nothing. And she's the relatively understanding one out of my parents...

I've learnt that the only person who can bring you happiness, is yourself. Do not let others discourage you. Get all the help and support you need and do what makes you happy in life :)

They might think your life is a breeze, but they do not know. Coincidentally, I am young and pretty too but looks really aren't everything.
 
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