I've been suffering from generalised social phobia for a long time and I was diagnosed with AvPD recently. I used medications few times for about 3-4 months, antidepressants (Fluoxetine, Paroxetine) and sedatives (Xanax), even antipsychotic (Clozapine), because they doubted if I was schizoid judging by the lack of interest in anything then. I was going to psychotherapists, to group therapy, I was reading some books about anxiety, trying to be as active as possible.
I've worked for 8 yrs, I've left college two times due to fear of exams, I'm attending one third time now, I attended few courses. I can do many things I couldn't do before, but there's no real progress in my socialising at all.
I still want so badly to live normal, fullfilled life, but I fail every time I try.
Due to my low self-esteem, intense fear of rejection, lack of spontaneity and inability to achieve intimacy with others I just can't make friends at all.
I've never met someone with such form of disorder as mine.
I treated it in any possible way I could, but it is persistent.
