Esperance
Well-known member
Sorry if that thread is useless but I'm really concern about what I should do
So, basically, the holidays just end and that was just some good time, I feel like I'm enjoying the life ( things like laugh during 10 minutes about a picture of a wood^^ ) and that's really nice. Getting outside and have a little walk is a pleasure again, I still find myself ugly but now, it's not like I'm Satan, when I see picture of me, I can watch them, I don't turn my head. Of course, everything isn't perfect. I still find everything I do really really terrible, I still can't just share what I like and talk to a random person but it's getting better, I can stay in a room with people who speak loudly or laugh without being really close to a panic attack, it's hard but I can stay in the room.
But there is one thing that bother and that's the lessons. Everytime I think about it, It's a little hard for my mental. Like last week, I was thinking about it and then, I got the panic attack with the cry, hitting my legs,... all the things that happen and also, like two days ago, during the night. I was really afraid because I was seeing myself in a really bad way, I felt like a lack any energy, I felt like being seated in the dark was helpful...
So here's what I would like to ask. Do you think that doing the lessons will be benefit because I'm really afraid that if I do them, I would lose all the good I gained during those two weeks or that I just find some stupid exuses to not do them ?
So, basically, the holidays just end and that was just some good time, I feel like I'm enjoying the life ( things like laugh during 10 minutes about a picture of a wood^^ ) and that's really nice. Getting outside and have a little walk is a pleasure again, I still find myself ugly but now, it's not like I'm Satan, when I see picture of me, I can watch them, I don't turn my head. Of course, everything isn't perfect. I still find everything I do really really terrible, I still can't just share what I like and talk to a random person but it's getting better, I can stay in a room with people who speak loudly or laugh without being really close to a panic attack, it's hard but I can stay in the room.
But there is one thing that bother and that's the lessons. Everytime I think about it, It's a little hard for my mental. Like last week, I was thinking about it and then, I got the panic attack with the cry, hitting my legs,... all the things that happen and also, like two days ago, during the night. I was really afraid because I was seeing myself in a really bad way, I felt like a lack any energy, I felt like being seated in the dark was helpful...
So here's what I would like to ask. Do you think that doing the lessons will be benefit because I'm really afraid that if I do them, I would lose all the good I gained during those two weeks or that I just find some stupid exuses to not do them ?