DanielLewis
Well-known member
Hey guys, I just want your opinion on this dating situation I've been in.
I recently dated this beautiful girl at my work who asked for my number. We went out together three times over the past three months. First, we went to the beach to walk around. Because of shyness and it being my first dating experience, it didn't go so great. I didn't have much to say, so I asked a lot of questions, sometimes random ones like "What would you spend $10 million on?"
After the date, she texted me saying she had a great time, so it must've not been so bad.
For the second date, we went to a drive-in and I found myself paying more attention to the movie than her. I didn't know what to say, but I tried. I told her she was really pretty and we cuddled, but I didn't try to escalate things and kiss her. I was too chicken and inside my head trying to figure out how to go about it. After this date, we hugged and, after, I texted her that I had a good time and she looked really pretty.
After this is when things seemed to really start to go downhill. I texted her, apologizing for the awkwardness at work because I don't talk to her really other than like "Hi, how are you?" It's hard for me to do in front of coworkers whom she's acquainted or friends with and I am not. She is more social than me so she has more people she talks to there. I just mind my own business and do my work. Anyway, I worked up the guts to go up and talk to her a couple of times but it went awkwardly for the most part. Well, the first time, just after our first day, it wasn't so bad because she tried to hug me but I didn't reciprocate because we were at work. After that, and our other dates, she seemed less interested, even trying to avoid me. I said something dumb to her like "When are you out of work?" so I guess it's no wonder, and then I stupidly followed her around when she had to get something from the cooler (we work in a restaurant).
After our second date, I asked her out again but she said she was going to be out of town for three weeks so couldn't hang out until after. I told her to have a good trip and waited until she texted me again, asking to go out for slushies after work. We did, and I screwed up. I unintentionally insulted her. It went like Me: "I like your nails." Her: "Thanks. They were done badly." Me: "Because you did them?" I wanted to kiss her so I stroked her hair at one point, telling her how soft it is. Immediately after, she said she had to get going and offered me a hug. We were in the parking lot outside of work in her car. Her: "I just hope I don't annoy you at work." Me: "You just get in my way sometimes, but not in a bad way. You can't help it."
So I said some stupid things to her because I was trying to talk way more than I usually do; I was trying to not be shy. I can understand why she hasn't wanted to go out again. I called her after this to ask her out. She agreed but, on the day of, cancelled and offered to reschedule. I told her to get back to me when she figures out her schedule, but she never did, and it's been three weeks. She then told me at work that she accidentally broke her phone and that's why she couldn't get back to me. I knew it was an excuse, but I didn't call her out on it. I just said it's no big deal and I wasn't mad or anything.
It's been continually awkward at work because, even though we only work together a couple times a week, we don't talk much. I've given up trying to approach her and talk at work. She works in a separate area of the restaurant and coworkers are around constantly. I also get a little self-conscious when I see other guys talking to her, sometimes flirting. It's not jealousy, but comparing myself to them and wondering why I can't seem to do that.
Today was my last day at work. We haven't hung out, or even talked outside of work, in three weeks. Thus, was it mean of me to not tell her it was my last day (I'm sure she heard) and not even say goodbye, or nice working with you? It would've just felt weird, given the situation, and I now don't see her much differently than any other coworker who I don't talk to or hang out with. Surely, I'm not going to go up to every coworker and say bye. She's no different. Am I being mean? What's your opinion of this whole situation, and what advice might you have for me that I can use in the future? I feel sort of like a loser blowing it with her, given that she showed so much interest in me at first, asking for my number, and now she wants nothing to do with me. Also, I'm 23-years-old and still haven't had a girlfriend or even my first kiss. I'm pissed I blew it because she's just my type, but looking back, I think it was almost inevitable. It was my first dating experience and we work together which complicated things. Also, not many girls are into shy guys. That's a fact.
I recently dated this beautiful girl at my work who asked for my number. We went out together three times over the past three months. First, we went to the beach to walk around. Because of shyness and it being my first dating experience, it didn't go so great. I didn't have much to say, so I asked a lot of questions, sometimes random ones like "What would you spend $10 million on?"
After the date, she texted me saying she had a great time, so it must've not been so bad.
For the second date, we went to a drive-in and I found myself paying more attention to the movie than her. I didn't know what to say, but I tried. I told her she was really pretty and we cuddled, but I didn't try to escalate things and kiss her. I was too chicken and inside my head trying to figure out how to go about it. After this date, we hugged and, after, I texted her that I had a good time and she looked really pretty.
After this is when things seemed to really start to go downhill. I texted her, apologizing for the awkwardness at work because I don't talk to her really other than like "Hi, how are you?" It's hard for me to do in front of coworkers whom she's acquainted or friends with and I am not. She is more social than me so she has more people she talks to there. I just mind my own business and do my work. Anyway, I worked up the guts to go up and talk to her a couple of times but it went awkwardly for the most part. Well, the first time, just after our first day, it wasn't so bad because she tried to hug me but I didn't reciprocate because we were at work. After that, and our other dates, she seemed less interested, even trying to avoid me. I said something dumb to her like "When are you out of work?" so I guess it's no wonder, and then I stupidly followed her around when she had to get something from the cooler (we work in a restaurant).
After our second date, I asked her out again but she said she was going to be out of town for three weeks so couldn't hang out until after. I told her to have a good trip and waited until she texted me again, asking to go out for slushies after work. We did, and I screwed up. I unintentionally insulted her. It went like Me: "I like your nails." Her: "Thanks. They were done badly." Me: "Because you did them?" I wanted to kiss her so I stroked her hair at one point, telling her how soft it is. Immediately after, she said she had to get going and offered me a hug. We were in the parking lot outside of work in her car. Her: "I just hope I don't annoy you at work." Me: "You just get in my way sometimes, but not in a bad way. You can't help it."
So I said some stupid things to her because I was trying to talk way more than I usually do; I was trying to not be shy. I can understand why she hasn't wanted to go out again. I called her after this to ask her out. She agreed but, on the day of, cancelled and offered to reschedule. I told her to get back to me when she figures out her schedule, but she never did, and it's been three weeks. She then told me at work that she accidentally broke her phone and that's why she couldn't get back to me. I knew it was an excuse, but I didn't call her out on it. I just said it's no big deal and I wasn't mad or anything.
It's been continually awkward at work because, even though we only work together a couple times a week, we don't talk much. I've given up trying to approach her and talk at work. She works in a separate area of the restaurant and coworkers are around constantly. I also get a little self-conscious when I see other guys talking to her, sometimes flirting. It's not jealousy, but comparing myself to them and wondering why I can't seem to do that.
Today was my last day at work. We haven't hung out, or even talked outside of work, in three weeks. Thus, was it mean of me to not tell her it was my last day (I'm sure she heard) and not even say goodbye, or nice working with you? It would've just felt weird, given the situation, and I now don't see her much differently than any other coworker who I don't talk to or hang out with. Surely, I'm not going to go up to every coworker and say bye. She's no different. Am I being mean? What's your opinion of this whole situation, and what advice might you have for me that I can use in the future? I feel sort of like a loser blowing it with her, given that she showed so much interest in me at first, asking for my number, and now she wants nothing to do with me. Also, I'm 23-years-old and still haven't had a girlfriend or even my first kiss. I'm pissed I blew it because she's just my type, but looking back, I think it was almost inevitable. It was my first dating experience and we work together which complicated things. Also, not many girls are into shy guys. That's a fact.
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