Um yea.. so how do I ask this girl out?

n0id

n0id

Active member
Some time ago I met a girl in a shop. I got the impression of her being shy and I am also very shy. So I think we would make a good friendship, if not a couple.
Well, I've been going to that shop for a few days now to buy breakfast. It's located right next to where I work so it's really great.

Anyway, she's not working there every morning for every day. But whenever she does work and I'm to buy something, I feel really goofy and have this strange feeling. I wonder if that is love? :? But anyway I can't possibly fall in love with a girl I don't know and who I've only seen a couple of times.

But yea. So what I base my assumption upon, with her being shy, is that she doesn't say stuff.. Like, she doesn't greet anyone, doesn't say how much it costs and stuff like that. It could be that she is also very bored with her job and find it very uninteresting.

I've made eye contact with her every time I've seen her, but I always look away :( I just can't look at her while she is looking at me :/

The only conversation we had was really silly :S Something along the lines of:
Me: Hi..
Her: hello.
Her: 37
Me: ..So can I withdraw 200 total?
Her: um.. you want 37 subtracted from 200?
Me: yes please.
Her: ok... Here you go.
Me: Thanks.
[awkward silence]
Me: Well, bye.
Her: bye.
Click to expand...
note: the numbers are in Norwegian Kroner. I think $1 is 6kr.

Well I feel both sad and happy at the same time whenever she is there. I really don't know how to explain it. But anyway, what I know I really want to do is ask her out. But how the hell am I going to build up the courage to do that?!

Edit,
And also, What if she is infact shy. And doesn't want to socialize :O or if she has a boyfriend or something. I'd make a fool of myself. Not to mention this scene taking place in a store with people behind me waiting to pay for their warez.
 
GloomySunday

GloomySunday

Well-known member
The only thing I can suggest is to just engage in light small talk with her. Every day you go in, say something like, "Hi, how's it going? Having a good day?" and leave it there.

Every day after that, say the same thing but build on it slightly, add a little more chat each time. You will soon know if she's interested or not.

Don't leap in and ask her out straight away - she doesn't know you...but don't leave it too long, either. Just chat a little bit each day and see where it goes from there.

I've dated a couple of girls this way. One worked in my local newsagent and the other worked in the cafe where I used to go with my friends for lunch. I just talked to them a little bit each time I went in and built on it. It was quite a natural thing. After a little time, whenever I would go in, they would talk to me! You've just got to break the ice and be friendly.
 
n0id

n0id

Active member
Sounds manageable. Not too much talk, and it gets to the point.
I'm going to practise. I am used with people talking to me first, so it's a new experience where I am the one to start.

ehm...
Hi. How are you?
 
n0id

n0id

Active member
So.. This was disapointing.
I was sitting in my car, and couldn't even go outside. I was parked outside the store, intending to go inside, buy a pepsi and try to say something.

I think because there were so many people in the store at the time, and it was raining, my sub-counscious decided this was not a good idea.

Well so I drove home and now I'm here. :?

I suck.
 
GloomySunday

GloomySunday

Well-known member
n0id said:
I suck.
Click to expand...

No, man...you rock. You made the effort. You were prepared to try. That takes courage.

What probably went wrong is that you built it up too much, over rehearsed the situation in your head, and so forth. Just relax a little.

It may help to engage in friendly, small talk with people in other shops, just to give you a bit of practice. In fact, in every shop, restaurant or cafe you go into from this day forwards, make a point of doing it. It's quite easy once you get going. I'm always doing it!

As long as you're friendly and relaxed (or at least appear to be) there's nothing to worry about. It's just idle chatter. You're not delivering a speech to Congress. You'll be great, just keep trying :D
 
n0id

n0id

Active member
Today I didn't get to stand in "her" line as there were too many people.
So I had a go at the short one where a male, probably my age, sat.

So yea anyway I realized after a while why so many people chose her line instead of the one I stood in. The person in front of me was such a pain in the ass. She was an old lady who didn't hear a thing, didn't bring enough money and was rather annoying.. So I think if I had gone to the other line I would've gone out sooner :D

Anyway I stood there waiting and suddenly I looked up, towards her (the girl). She was looking at me :eek: I was paralyzed and blushed.. I really need to overcome my shyness.. one of these days I will! So yea, I managed to look away, I'm not good at eye-to-eye contact.

I was happy that she looked at me (and for so long) when she had so many people to take care of in her line.
But this doesn't probably mean anything. I'm probably over-reacting to this, so I try not to get my hopes up.

Wow, I sound really stupid writing all of this down. But yea, internet is pretty anonymous (except for the moderators on this forum who can see my IP address and track me down to my current whereabouts.. aww..) so I really don't mind.

edit:
I bought a hat when I was in London. It's a really cool hat that I love :) I don't go anywhere without it. It makes my head look so cool 8) . So I think, because nobody wears a hat where I live, she recognize me whenever I walk in the store. yay! (and think I'm cool, because I wear a hat. haha. eh, not really.. Maybe she think that's stupid, or I'm an "attention seeker". That would suck.)

Anyway, GloomySunday:
I will engage in small talk with random people (in shops :roll:).
This sounds like it will help me overcome my shyness.
And thanks for the encouragement you give me.
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Top