Too scared to get help

Hocuspocus

Hocuspocus

Member
I have become more and more anxious since losing my job and splitting up with my boyfriend almost 4 years ago.
I have only 1 friend left who comes over once a week. If I'm totally honest i'd rather not see her either.
I'm a single parent receiving income support and don't go anywhere apart from the supermarket and then only if one of the children will come with me.
I'm severely phone phobic and will only use the phone to text. I also won't answer the door to anyone, talk to the neighbours, go to parents evenings at school etc or even the local shop because i can't bear the thought of having to speak to someone.
I know i need help but am so shy/scared that i can't even pluck up the courage to phone or call into the doctors to make an appointment.
I feel so guilty that my kids have such a freak for a mother and i worry in case they turn out like me.
Also since losing job&boyfriend i have gained 3 stone and aged about 10 years. I also drink a bottle of wine at least 3 times a week. Every night sometimes. This has made my self esteem plummet and makes me even more nervous to go anywhere as i think people are staring at me&thinking how repulsive i look.
Does anyone have any advice? I really want to beat this. How can i become brave enough to see a doctor? I really am at my wits end.
 
DaaaBulls

DaaaBulls

Well-known member
My advice would be to stop drinking the wine, alchohal is a depressant, so you are basicly digging yourself deeper and deeper with every bottle.

Next, I would start looking for another job so that you can support your children.

Then find a doctor that you can trust and go talk to them, just tell them everything, they aren't going to judge you and if they do you do not ever have to visit them again.

This is really all that I can think of with the information you gave me. Maybe start trying to talk to people/answer the door so that you don't fall even deeper into social phobia?
 
B

Beyondshy

Well-known member
Could you ask your friend for help? Maybe she could phone the doctor to make an appointment for you and then go with you.
 
SammyT

SammyT

Well-known member
See a doctor - do not feel scared or ashamed. They are used to dealing with people in this state. If you feel like you appear anxious or wierd then try and think this will only help you, as it will pure and simply indicate the the doctor that you are in need of some help. Do not worry about not being taken seriously either. SA is a well documented and recognised disorder nowadays.

I would not suggest getting a job yet. Perhaps apply for mental health benefits after seeing your doctor. You can then move onwards from there. Don't jump in at the deep end by getting a job. Getting and starting a new job can be stressful on its own, nevermind if you suffer from depression / SA aswell. You can get onto this later. Remember just take one day at a time and dissect your goals up into neat and manageable pieces.


Good luck!
 
I_Walk_Alone

I_Walk_Alone

Well-known member
Hmm, this story sounds familiar.

Get off the alcohol. I dont care how you manage it, just do it.

And excuse me if I scoff at what doctors think! Think of them as toilet cleaners, their not paid to be timid. And most of them are nice anway, its just that their so used to dealing with all kinds of people they just dont know what to expect!

MAKE SURE YOU LOOK SHY AND TIMID!!! (But make sure you say anything you feel you WANT to say, no matter how embarrassing you tell yuorself it is, and if you dont, theres always next time!)

This isn't a social call so theres no need to put on your social face.

Your kids love you, unconditionally. I promise you. Helping youself through this will be helping them also, and in a big way. :)

Just my two cents.
 
Hocuspocus

Hocuspocus

Member
Thanks for the replies.
I'll pluck up the courage to see the doctor-will get my friend to make an appointment for me.
So glad i found this site. It's good to fine people who understand how i feel :)
 
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