Thrown out

[1994]

My dad just an hour ago said to me, you have untill the weekend then you pack your bags...

My dad owns his own business and employs the rest of his family, due to the reccession things have been hard. He comes home grumpy and angered, and I am always the one who he takes it out on.

Just before Lying in my bed, I felt like I have numerous times in my life, totally miss treated, sorrowful and not a single person to argue my corner or stick up for me. My mum is totally passive, she will allow my dad to ride roughshod all over me and brake me down to my core mercifullessly untill I am in total dispair, but will never stick up for me or say he is wrong, because she knows he is a loose cannon, and believes to prevent arguments she cannot dissagree.

I have been out of work now for about 3 months, but over the last 4 years, since dropping out of UNI (I'm 23) he has constantly belittled me for what seems like trivial things. When I have a job, I am a failure for dropping out, even if it's 4 years ago. When I don't have a job it's "You need to get a job, I am sick of you leeching off us". (he won't give me a penny anyway). To put it in fine points he always has an excuse to take his anger out, and it is ALWAYS on me, and my mum will never help, and for this reason I blame her just as much. If we argue, and he knows I am right, which is often as his arguments has no foundation, he will try to insult me to my core, and make me bleed emotionally, or bring things up that are totally errelivant to make him feel he is right. This in my opinion is a digusting way to treat a human being, especially your son. He has never shown love to me, and really does epitomize poor human trait I know.

I was thrown out today, because my friend was round who I play a league on a football game on the Xbox with during the day, this is literally my only time to let off steam, (when the rest of the persecuters are at work). Even my two brothers are the same. I am the total whipping boy, and this is possibly because I am the most emotionally honest and in my opinion fairest person in the household.

After seeing my friend here, for the third time in about 4 weeks, along with my girlfriend stayin over too much (This is another thing he beats me up about, even though we never get in the way, and even they admit she's the nicest girl going.) And not tidying my room (I forgot) he has thrown me out.

He has run roughshod over me my entire life, I have been his emotional punching bag, he has burnt me to the ground, and if that isn't enough, he has now thrown me out. He doesn't realise how much he owes me, how much he has destroyed my life.

He has been telling me to get a job for weeks and I have now got some interviews, and now he throw's me out?

I guess I am looking for some recognition, but is any of this fair? I stood my ground with him, as I often do, telling him how I see what his game is, even if he doesn't and how he takes all his anger out on me, and then he kicked and broke and snapped the neck on my 1200 pound guitar, before punching my monitor and breaking a mirror, because he cannot accept he is in denial and I am right.

Is any of this fair? I just want someone too see my perspective.

My girlfriend just walked out, after I told her to leave me alone because shesaid I should listen to my parents, but she obviously doesn't understand. Now I am lying in bed, with not one person in the world who understands how much underserved flack I have encountered, and how unfair it is, with potentially and ended relationship.

Sorry for the rant. But even though I am recovering, it just never gets any easier, I know I need to move out to sort all this, and when I do, I will never speak to my family again.

 

[bsebring]

Well... he seems like a pompous and selfish individual. My parents raised me to believe that if you have kids then it's their reasonability to take care of their kids, and to be a support system. I'm sorry that you don't have that good role model in your life. But you can't let his BS effect you. All that stuff he's been doing to you is toxic. Maybe it's good that you're getting out. This gives you the chance to be a better man than he ever was to you. Idk, it's a bad situation but the best thing you can do is focus your best on getting some income and move on.

 

[1994]

My thoughts exactly. It's just hard getting a job, nevermind nailing one down, when everyday you are emotionally exhausted because of said individual. I can deal with going to work and all the ****e that comes with it, but then to have a dad who emotionally kicks the stuffing out of me at every oppurtunity to relieve his stress, is too much.

Like you say though, I need to get out asap, do myself a favour and not let this person treet me like this.

 

[bsebring]

That's a really good mindset to keep. Good luck with your interviews!!

 

[scoobycrawler]

I hope you find your freedom slave...

 

[Minty]

Sounds like your father has a LOT of issues. Stable people don't break things when they're angry.

I hope you find a job soon and earn your independence. I'm sorry you've been going through this; it must be really tough.

 

[DespairSoul]

hello

Do you know what? Maybe would be much better for u change environment u know? Because your father isnt alright if he do this to you. He have a lot of issues and he volunteer this with anger on someone who is his family,his blood he isnt for you model of behavior wich u should even pay attention,he is your father and he should raise u,exmplain u stuff and try be understanding and not make u inferior only because he is your father and he is lion of that household. Your mom is totaly influented of him as i see, soft pile wich would break in first curve wich will be getting wild ride with your father. She is affraid of him only dont be mad on your mom, coz of this she should say something and stick for u i know, but she loves u and for sure she feel hurted if come to those situations. Is a lot of womans what lisen husband like that because they are to scared get involved. Your dad is hot head and u need peace. He dont behave good to you and faith. If he throws u he make u favor because u will be on your own and u will not must lisen him anymore his non faith explosions of anger wich u dont deserve. U try your best and if he dont see it, then is his lose not yours. He will maybe understand what he done but will be to late. Good luck in entire live and dont worry i know is hard but i hope u will find your stabile pile. Sorry for mistakes in my post i hope u will understand

 

[1994]

Thankyou for your replys people, it means a lot.

Fortionatley I met up with my girlfriend for a drink and stayed at hers and everything is O.K with her. I came home about 10 minutes ago, and got the usual from my dad upon arrival "what the hell are you doing?!" (not a way of greating someone in my opinion), but that is to be expected. Feel much better today, and will get on with my recovery.

Thanks for help with the rough times.