the weekends

Hello :)

At the weekends I mostly don't have anything to do.
I can plan things, but sometimes I really feel like, avoiding it.
But although I do have friends, to invite them, ask them to go out.
But still my life depends on my SA, because I find it really hard to be around people and I blame myself on that. It's so hard my struggle with SA.
So this weekend, my dad will perform with his band, in a cafe.
And my mom says I should ask a friend to go with me,
but it makes me feel so in doubt, because i dont feel good about that.
people judging me, and so on. And being afraid or running away and not being able to go back to the place where my dad will perform... ::(:
So yeah. what should i do. should i ask a friend, or just go with my mom and her friends. I really would feel stupid without having a friend around me,
because i feel pretty un-popular to my mom's friends when they catch me up without someone having around. Sounds stupid, but im afraid of what they think of me. But i really dont know what to do. I hate my anxiety.
And I wont run away, but i think of it. but still im so nervous for this.. but i SURE want to see my dad perform... I really want to go.. so im already over the stage of going to the cafe.. but still im worried how i will do that.... dam.. i really wish i could control my sa.. and show people i can..
because i really want to be a strong woman without these things, because i want to be outgoing
thats my dream...
 
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Some thoughts. Ask a friend who knows you and understands, a safe friend to go with. Wear something nice, but average looking, that wont attract attention. Find a spot that's a little darker and against a wall. Know that eyes will be on the band, not you. Remember that if people do look at you it is mostly with other thoughts in their heads, not judging you. If you feel muscles tensing allow them to relax. If you notice you mind racing with negative self talk, slow it down, replace it with a nice thought (? what might this be). Breath in and out slowly and deeply, using your diaphragm < practice this now.
Have fun :D
 

CopenhagenCasual

Active member
So yeah. what should i do. should i ask a friend, or just go with my mom and her friends. I really would feel stupid without having a friend around me, because i feel pretty un-popular to my mom's friends when they catch me up without someone having around. Sounds stupid, but im afraid of what they think of me. But i really dont know what to do. I hate my anxiety.

If you go with or without friends then you're doing pretty ok. I would stay at home no matter what :rolleyes:

I understand your situation. My mom's friend is coming over tonight and I'm alone in my room yet again. I have so many times thought "what does she think about me!"...

Anyway you should ask a friend to go with, then you can feel "safe" :)
 

pirl

Well-known member
I understand completely what you are saying.

The advice I would give you is to bring your friend and like others said to bring a 'safe' friend. I spent a lot of my life avoiding situations like this and I really regret it now. Your mind is probably racing trying to make a decision 'will i go?, if i go who will i bring? will they want to go? if they go will they enjoy it, will i be able to speak with them?' etc.

Make a decision and go with it. Once the decision is made, don't go back over it. if you decide to go, tell youself that's your decision and that you will stick to it and try not to think about it then...
 
thnx you all, i invited a friend. and i will try to stay relaxed. ;)
I am just going to enjoy my time... :)
Btw phocas really nice things... ill write them down. :p
I will keep that in mind....

And I'm glad u guys understand.. =)

Im going to bed now.. 12:25 here in the night.. Omg, im such a night owl..
And tomorrow it will get late, so I need some sleep lol

Xx thanks all
 
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