The Truth About Bullying

[Truther_Pro]

Hello. In my life I have uncovered many truths, such as - why logic is more important than faith, why there is no God, how to become successful and rich and acquire your dreams, etc...now I want to tell you the truth about bullying, remember - this is THE TRUTH. I've studied this phenomena for quite a while.
Okay, so remember, bullying mostly occures within teen age range. So let's say 13-16 years. If you let yourself be bullied, you will be bullied even more. Many people like you make a huge mistake like flipping out and killing a classmate or mutilating him or going over the line in any other way. Okay, maybe you will not be bullied any more, but you won't win by doing this. You won't earn RESPECT. Everything is about RESPECT. Why? Because EVERYBODY can take a fucking knife or gun and shoot anyone. It takes no skill, it's just means that they broke you. You don't want that, people will think you are a psycho and that's all. You want to gain RESPECT! There are numbers of ways to do that. First of all - do not be afraid of pain. The best variation is start going to gym and kickboxing, boxing or mauy thai. DON'T go to aikido, kung fu, karate or some other shit where you don't get real fighting. Those katas are useless, so are all the fancy moves. Believe me, I've been in all this. I trained karate for a long time and it didn't prevent me from getting bullied. Martial arts basically make yourself think you are tought by creating an illusion. You will become tough only when you do real fighting in the ring or whatever, so pick a tough fighting art (I suggest kickboxing). Okay, another way is NOT to train fighting but to simply fight against bullies. For example, if he punches you, you punch him back. Even if you don't know how to, just do it. Just show some opposition, he will respect that eventually and they will not touch you. You might get beaten up a little or even beat up the bully, but that is the right way (if you train fighting, you will have higher % chance to fuck him up). Never turn the other cheek - NEVER! Now another important lesson - NEVER CROSS THE LINE. By that I mean never FLIP OUT. Keep it calm! Remember, that the bully could flip out, too. And beat you up even more if he wanted it. Remember that he is not hurting you too much for PURPOSE, he knows where the line is. So if you think you will be tougher by gauging his eyes out - you won't. The best way to do this is let the bully admit he failed or make him say sorry. That's why Brazilian Jui Jitsu is a good thing, you can drive someone into submission by not really doing any damage. Yeah, beat him up, make him crawl on the ground, if he continues fighting, beat him up even more, but don't go overboard. Let him admit his defeat and you will win. Of course, there are exceptions, like if the bully is getting really pissed off at you for fucking him up and tries to stab you or something - yeah, then you can fuck him up badly. A whole new thing is real self defence - remember bullying isn't really assault, you just show whos boss. But if someone attacks you on street in order to rob you or tries to kill you - yeah then you need to get really angry and flip out at the person, otherwise you might get fucked up. Believe me, it's the truth, I've been training self defence for quite a while now, I know this shit.
TLR
1. Always fight back and defend yourself.
2. Don't do more than the bully did (don't cross the line). If he just punched you a few times, you don't need to break his both arms (Remember, he could break your neck and arms if he wanted, too). These are unwritten rules.
3. Don't use any weapons unless bully is using them. Then use the same weapon.
4. Don't confuse bullying and school fights with real street fights and self defence on street.
5. If you have time, go to gym (getting buff automatically makes a high % of you not getting bullied) + go to kickboxing, boxing, brazilian jui jitsu, muay thai (never go to Aikido, Tai Chi and other fancy martial arts that look good but have no real use. They are more like ballet. Don't argue with me on this one - I am speaking from experience and if you don't believe me - try it)
6. You can punch first if someone is calling you names or verbally bullying you but again - don't overdo it.
7. Change your thinking and mentality. If you will be a punch bag in school, you will be a punch bag in real life.
8. EARN RESPECT!

 

[idealist77]

Ah, damn. I wish I'd heard this advice before I flipped out and killed/mutilated all those people back in my high school days. I'm sure there are many others here that feel the same way.

 

[Truther_Pro]

Listen, you can act smart and everything, but that's your problem. I am offering you only the truth - nothing more, nothing less. If you don't believe me it works - try it.

 

[creep_x]

truther, i think u make a valid point. I think fighting back & getting beaten up is better than losing ur own dignity & self respect. I'd rather put on a fight & have bruises than be a doormat.

 

[Johno]

I think you are talking about the essence of bullying and that is fear. Without fear a bully is nothing. They rely on fear and try to spread it to or create more fear amongst the general wider community. It comes down to basics. If you fear someone you lose. If you believe that he fears u, you win. Don't be afraid. Be confident in your abilities. Visualize kicking his ass. Look forward to fighting him. That in itself will cause you to win.

 

[Infected_2]

if anything, bullies help more than they hurt.

while i love the positivity in your 8 steps, i think there's a better way to deal with bullies than to simply try and fight back. because most likely, that's setting yourself up for failure right from the start.

don't get me wrong though, i'm not talking about being a doormat. doormats victimize themselves. i'm talking about finding some middleground - ignore them. most likely, if you're not afraid enough to casually pass by and not get into it with them, you can usually avoid pure dickheads. when you really think about it, it's all about balance.

all in all, you don't need to earn their respect. or anybody's respect for that matter. if you keep yourself in a state of needing people's respect, you'll probably never feel that good about yourself. selling your soul to that all-time-low is really self degrading. you're more than that, d00d.

 

[joeljjison]

I want to pick you up on a few things.

"The best variation is start going to gym and kickboxing, boxing or mauy thai. DON'T go to aikido, kung fu, karate or some other shit where you don't get real fighting. Those katas are useless, so are all the fancy moves"

I'll agree you with aikido and karate... you don't get a whole lot of sparring or any equivalent. But nobody does as a beginner. I think its a bit ridiculous to go straight into ring based fighting... theres nothing wrong with starting with something that feels safe, and pushes you a bit , to get you ready... kung fu is chinese, and is quite different. not to mention theres masses of versions out there.

I train in wing chun. Its a form of kung fu. We only do light sparring in our conditioning class (mostly boxing style)... we train by doing drills and making things reflexive... we attack each other with the intent to hurt, and if you fuck up, your gonna get hit hard... unless your against someone who still hasnt got that message.

forms are definitely not useless... your kinda saying using guns and knifes is bad, but then ur saying that everything that isnt very simple combat, mostly reflex based is useless.. kickboxing, boxing and muay thai are pretty damn hard... not everyone is cut out for the level of fitness you need, and the amount of conditioning.. unless your gonna do a half hearted job... and that kinda gives it less meaning...

i kinda agree with you on some stuff... practicing in the air is no use to you when your fighting.. you do need to spar or simulate with a dynamic enough drill, so that you lose a fear of being hit, and get used to hitting and feeling contact.

Katas and forms are not useless. they are useless in a combat situation.. theres a difference.

brazilian jui jitsu is a great idea.. id really love to do that, but theres nowhere near me.

boxing is not ideal self defence... it'll be usually fine in a school yard where there are unspoken rules

Point 3:- If they're using a weapon, you have to take them out, or run away. either of those actions are your priority...

7.. yeah i have to work on that..

overall i dont things are so cut and dry as you make out

 

[Psychedelicious]

The best way to not have a bully is not have anything to be bullied about, or atleast I think. Now that I see it, I have never been bullied by anyone at school in my life. I've never actually seen or heard about people saying mean things to me. Now I notice it's because there is really nothing they could bully me about, there's no reason to make fun of me. Maybe I'm just not the kind of person people like to pick on. They don't know anything about me, they don't know me so why are they going to be mean? People at school, and people in general aren't really mean to me, they have no reason to, I'm not afraid of them or anything. No one has actually ever insulted me in my face. Maybe I'm just lucky and, Maybe I'm totally wrong but there often has to be a main reason why people are bullied, and there's no reason I don't see why they would do it? I would fight back if I had too, but since there are no problems like that, I don't need to worry about it . What is it people are bullied about?

 

[idealist77]

What is it people are bullied about?

People don't need much of a reason and once it starts it can easily be picked up by others. I've always had to deal with bullying but I had a small group of "friends" in which I felt reasonably comfortable. Then an old friend of theirs came back from traveling the country and started making fun of me. Eventually a few others in the group picked it up and the level of respect they had for me dropped. Some people are bullied simply because they are shy. Maybe they have acne or are a bit tall and lanky or something. People only need stupid reasons such as these.

 

[livingnsilence]

I'm sure some of these stratagies might work for some bullies but not all. Fighting back should at least make you feel better and less like you were actually bullied. I used to be a little bit of a bully at times back in elementary school (I feel so bad about it now though) and I'd bully people either b/c they were doing something that annoyed me or made me mad so I'd try to punish them for it or I'd bully b/c I was trying to impress/please other friends. I actually liked it when people fought back b/c it was more fun and I used to like to get people pissed off if I was controling thier anger (When I was bored I'd pick fights sometimes just b/c I'd like to get them angery and see their reaction) and made me look even better if I won. For me, probably the worst thing someone could have done to get back at me for bullying is somehow steal the friends I was trying to impress or embarassing me in front of them somehow.

 

[joeljjison]

"The best way to not have a bully is not have anything to be bullied about, or atleast I think."

In a sense yes... but its not a matter of not having something different... the best way to not be bullied (im only talking verbal here) is to be completely unaffected, by anything they throw at you. For why people get bullied or don't get bullied.. its partly luck... and partly its people who are most affected... or most OBVIOUSLY affected.

still even that isnt always true... sometimes they push at someone forever to get a reaction.. and if all they're doing is pretending to not be affected...

"I actually liked it when people fought back b/c it was more fun and I used to like to get people pissed off if I was controling thier anger (When I was bored I'd pick fights sometimes just b/c I'd like to get them angery and see their reaction) and made me look even better if I won. "

Not a smart place to be spilling such things lol... i think your right.. if i had been capable of reacting with real force, alot of bullies would have gone away after one attempt... rather than multiplying because i was easily pissed off yet couldn't do anything about it.

 

[erika]

Why ppl are bullied:
Yea it really doesn't take much, for me just being a different race did it!