Zarrix
Well-known member
Thursday, March 13, 2008
Sensing Judgement
I would like to explain another aspect of SA this evening.
One of the primary fears of SA sufferers is the judgement. It is hostile, pecking away at any standing you have. We get all tense when a potential judgement could occur even if it isn't yelled out loud. It is this tenseness that usually leads to a mistake and a loss of common sense. The old vicious circle at work again.
Summary- This cycle goes like this
Fear of judgement---->Tenseness/ Anxiety -----> Mistake because of Anxiety-----> Inevitable judgement----->Further loss in confidence.
The only way to stop this chain is to stop it at its root, that fear. The volatile judgement fear could of been developed very early on in life, bullying, too much unwanted expectation among other possibilities. Stopping this knee jerk reaction is easier said than done, because it is a product of our past experiences. The past has brought about severe negative judgements, which have in return created a fear of even milder cases.
You can detect a potential judge like a cat searching for mice. The dreaded stare is the worst of all, other authority figures can also be anxiety inducing. Social Phobics tend to gain harsher anxiety around some people to a greater extent than other people. Its all about how much judgement potential there is. For example, the opposite gender is a classic one, especially if they are around your age. There is the possibility that they are 'checking you out' in a sense. That brings on the anxiety, it is a judgement after all.
Superiors can trigger an attack too. If someone who you think is 'better' than you at your job is analysing your motions, then it becomes fiercely intimidating. You make a mistake, and your standing within the place falls. You don't want them to tell you what to do either, because it will appear that you haven't been smart enough to figure it out on your own. Unfortunately none of us are superman, but unless we are, this fear won't go away. We are never perfect, yet we expect ourselves to be so. Perfectionism is the only way to avoid negative judgement. It, like gold under a rainbow , can never be found.
Anxiety is related to the potential for judgement, if they are likely to judge you, you get anxiety, simple. It isn't an automatic reaction to certain groups. You will not react in the same way to a same-age nerd as an outgoing one. You won't get as much anxiety from older people of the opposite sex as you would younger.
Judgements are inevitable, but volatile to only a select few. So much energy is drained trying to detect them and prevent any further damage to pride. And no-energy equals more mistakes.
We live in a hostile cycle, breaking it isn't as simple as pressing a button. After all, we aren't superheroes. Sometimes, this seems the only way out of the volatility, but quietly, we search for another way
May seem like a lot to read, but I think this is how out anxiety triggers. To some people, I must seem like the biggest moron in the world. I know I am not dumb, but people are beginning to think I am. Irrational? A little bit, but the longer I expose my anxiety, the more rational my thoughts become =(
Sensing Judgement
I would like to explain another aspect of SA this evening.
One of the primary fears of SA sufferers is the judgement. It is hostile, pecking away at any standing you have. We get all tense when a potential judgement could occur even if it isn't yelled out loud. It is this tenseness that usually leads to a mistake and a loss of common sense. The old vicious circle at work again.
Summary- This cycle goes like this
Fear of judgement---->Tenseness/ Anxiety -----> Mistake because of Anxiety-----> Inevitable judgement----->Further loss in confidence.
The only way to stop this chain is to stop it at its root, that fear. The volatile judgement fear could of been developed very early on in life, bullying, too much unwanted expectation among other possibilities. Stopping this knee jerk reaction is easier said than done, because it is a product of our past experiences. The past has brought about severe negative judgements, which have in return created a fear of even milder cases.
You can detect a potential judge like a cat searching for mice. The dreaded stare is the worst of all, other authority figures can also be anxiety inducing. Social Phobics tend to gain harsher anxiety around some people to a greater extent than other people. Its all about how much judgement potential there is. For example, the opposite gender is a classic one, especially if they are around your age. There is the possibility that they are 'checking you out' in a sense. That brings on the anxiety, it is a judgement after all.
Superiors can trigger an attack too. If someone who you think is 'better' than you at your job is analysing your motions, then it becomes fiercely intimidating. You make a mistake, and your standing within the place falls. You don't want them to tell you what to do either, because it will appear that you haven't been smart enough to figure it out on your own. Unfortunately none of us are superman, but unless we are, this fear won't go away. We are never perfect, yet we expect ourselves to be so. Perfectionism is the only way to avoid negative judgement. It, like gold under a rainbow , can never be found.
Anxiety is related to the potential for judgement, if they are likely to judge you, you get anxiety, simple. It isn't an automatic reaction to certain groups. You will not react in the same way to a same-age nerd as an outgoing one. You won't get as much anxiety from older people of the opposite sex as you would younger.
Judgements are inevitable, but volatile to only a select few. So much energy is drained trying to detect them and prevent any further damage to pride. And no-energy equals more mistakes.
We live in a hostile cycle, breaking it isn't as simple as pressing a button. After all, we aren't superheroes. Sometimes, this seems the only way out of the volatility, but quietly, we search for another way
May seem like a lot to read, but I think this is how out anxiety triggers. To some people, I must seem like the biggest moron in the world. I know I am not dumb, but people are beginning to think I am. Irrational? A little bit, but the longer I expose my anxiety, the more rational my thoughts become =(
