teen and parents

[yeah_5]

I have social anxiety and depression, I am 18 years old. I have had social anxiety since I was almost 3. When i was 16 I was put on medications and saw a therapist for 5 months. It didn't help me. So when i was 17 I was put in a research study for 5 months in a town an hour and a half away and we would drive up once a week so that i could participate in the study with my therapist. After those 5 months I shortly fell back through again and when I turned 18 I was hospitalized as a mental hospital patient for two months on my own, 6 hours away. I am now taking medication again 300 mg of effexor. Its been 5 months since ive been there and I am currently at home now living with my parents and younger sister. I feel like my parents put too much pressure on me and expect so much from me. I feel like they don't understand how much I have been through and how much I am trying. They tell me that "I make no effort, they don't see me trying, all you do is sleep all day, watch tv, and go on the internet." If i wasn't trying then I wouldn't have lived in a hospital for two months. My dad has told me to get a life, go outside. He has told me he doesn't care about me, that he is sick to death of me, that he is tired of my bull****, that I should move out of the house and my mom agrees with him. They don't listen to me when I try to explain them something they always have to be right. They do not know how to communicate with me, and I want them to be supportive, instead of just yelling at me and making me feel worse about myself. It's as if they don't think I am actually mentally ill. They don't know how hard it is for me just to do simple things. My dad yelled at me last night and I cried all night, and I ended up cutting myself.

 

[yeah_5]

I didnt really know where to post this on the site.

 

[Dead_on_Arrival]

Firstly, welcome to SPW. You will always find someone here to talk to and get advise from. Are you still seeing your therapist? I would consider asking your therapist to sit down and talk to your parents to try and explain to them exactly what you suffer from, how it affects you and how their behaviour towards you compounds your problems. Just remember, you are not alone.
And please try to not cut yourself. If you find yourself thinking about doing it come on here for a chat with someone.

 

[sucettes]

Awww, you poor thing. I can totally relate to what you're saying. I feel that my parents don't understand how serious it is either and my parents has said the same as yours; "you're just on the internet all day and sleep bla bla bla"

Since I'm depressed I have no energy, they have no idea how hard it is for me to do normal everyday stuff, I'm miserable and I simply don't feel like doing anything else than sleeping. There's no point and every time I try to make some effort and do something they always complain that it's not good enough and I feel tired all the time. And I can't go out because of my SA so I have to stay in the house even if I want to or not. But they just think I'm lazy and don't give a sh*t about anything. It's annoying.

The fact that you have social phobia is not your fault and they shouldn't talk to you the way they do. It's f*cking disrespectful. No one will never understand it unless they have been through it themselves so you can't expect them to fully understand but they should at least show you some respect and *try* to understand. They should do their best and support you, it's the least they can do for their kid.

I wish there was a way that I could help you or to give you the perfect advise. I suppose the best you can do is to go to your therapist and let your parents talk to him as well.

I hope you feel better soon, hang in there.

 

[lilmutegirl]

I can relate. I didn't talk to my parents about my social phobia till I was 18, when I told my mom that I thought I needed therapy. Her response was, "get a job." I did get a job, and my mom never helped me get therapy, so I finally went on my own 5 years later.

I agree that you should talk to your therapist about the way your parents treat you and see if there is anyway for the therapist to talk to them. People don't always understand what they don't experience, and, you may find yourself making progress that they don't see or appreciate.

I definitely think you should continue therapy (I have started and quit 3 times in the past 6 years). And try not to cut yourself--talk to your therapist about this too. I hope it is not a habit.

And, though I don't know what your financial situation is, and how easy or difficult this would be for you, it may actually be good if you can move out of your parents' house. I have made much more progress overcoming my anxiety since I no longer live my parents.

 

[thor01]

Don't listen to them when they say that stuff.
They should understand not everyone is like and can do/does the same things as everyone else. They shouldnt want you to be a clone.