student support

[Doylesgirl]

i'm in my last year at uni at the moment, and first week back after christmas and i have yet to make it to a lecture. going to try one tomorrow though.

anyone here in uni or at school having a bad time? just thinking maybe we can support each other in this thread or something?

 

[SilentType]

I took the easy way out of uni and gave up after withdrawing myself from three out of four semesters. I got a 3.75 GPA that one semester I finished, but why spend the money if theres a 75% chance you're not going to make it through the semester... Thats just me, I guess. I can find other ways to make money.

Peace

 

[Doylesgirl]

i'm studying english with creative writing. i managed to get through a lecture today and went to go and see what i missed in the classes i missed monday and tuesday and the lecturer was really spportive. i got classed as 'a problem student' during my second year as i deferred after mys first year cos i couldn't cope. but i working in the supermarket full time as i was in the year out i got even more down and anxious so i went back to try again, and got some councelling, and help.

i never sit my anyone in any of my classes, i've got the reputation of a reclusive person, and i don't mind it as much as i used to. i'm ok with being the freak, better than being a sheep i say. my problem is i don't give the best first impression, i tend to challenge people to be my friend. and the few friends i have got have found they actually like my quirky nature cos i always keep them guessing. i tend to have multi personalities, and they seem to like that because they only have one if that makes sense.

i'm ok, i just don't like being on my own when i am having my extreme down moments of feeling extremely anxious.

what is everyone else studying?

 

[Korexico]

It's such a relief to know I'm not the only college kid who skips classes sometimes because of personal problems. I am also in the last year at university but my classes start next week.

The first day is always such a big deal for me because I'm afraid of the new surroundings and people. I especially dread picking where to sit the first day and the classes that have the forced introductions. Usually, after a couple of weeks I settle into a routine and that usually is enough to drive me throughout. No new friends and I sit by myself for the most part but what can you do?

Maybe this is getting too personal but I do regret, though, that I went through college without having a girlfriend or making any good friends. My best friends are still from high school. Tough to make it through the day without talking to anybody especially when it feels like you're the ONLY guy in the world who's a senior and doesn't know anybody.

I'm studying chemistry by the way, although I personally prefer english and philosophy. Too cowardly to follow my passions, so I chose what I thought was a safer alternative. Ironically, one reason I chose chemistry was because I thought I would have to talk to less girls, but all my lab partners have been girls so far.

So much for stereotypes, huh?

EDIT: I didn't know this was the depression forum when I made this post. I am mainly referring to my social anxiety, although I received counseling for depression so I can definitely relate to that.

 

[Doylesgirl]

yeah, i have had councelling for depression, but i am moslty an anxious person. maybe i should have statred the thread somewhere else. still trying to get to grips with this forum...lol

although i find no shame in having the same friends from school, my good friend is someone i went to school with, and the freinds i've got are local, cos i go to a uni near my home anyway, cos i was too scared to go to another one.

i'm dreading graduation cos when my sister graduated she was the life of the party with all friends, and here i am with no friends in my graduating class, so where as there's loads of pics of her with lost of her friends in the photo albums, i will be just on my own.

korexico, do you live on campus?

 

[Korexico]

Hi doylesgirl,

I don't live on campus though I seriously thought about it in highschool. I go to college close to home too mainly for the same reasons as you.

As loony as this sounds, I'm seriously considering NOT graduating in the ceremony because of anxiety and the fact that I have no friends there. My family thinks that's weird but they don't really say anything because they hate to talk about my personal problems.

I'm not necessarily ashamed of having old friends, it just makes me feel bad when I hear that college is supposed to be the "best years of your life." Long story short: I feel like an old man. :x

 

[sidney]

yeah schools doing my head in atm cus ive to give a short speech infront of my class next week and im really terrified :? also my exams are getting closer and all the pressure is mixing with my SP problems and its just becoming very overwhelming i just wanna cry and not do any of it but i know i want a good job and bright future so ive to stick it all out

 

[Foliddudoute]

University.

I've already failed one year of Uni and it looks like they're going to fail me again this year.

I can't bring myself to go into lectures. I panic just outside the door and go and hide somewhere instead. And then my self-esteem plummets and my depression goes through the roof because I feel like such a failiure.

The worse of it is, I know my dad won't understand. He'll think I'm being lazy.

 

[scissorhands]

I feel for you. I just finished University. I took summer courses and things to finish in 2 and a half years, thankfully, if I didn't I don't thiink I could have continued going it got so difficult. It was incredibly difficult and I know exactly how you probably feel.
When your next semester starts, always go the first day thats the first step. And just don't consider not going an option, go to every single class. I used to go in early before everyone and claim a seat so I wouldn't have to walk in in front of everyone. If I arrived late for classes sometimes I'd have panic attacks like you and go hide in the library instead of going in, so I know what that's like. Get there early.

Hang in there. It's incredibly difficult I know. Are you studying something you're genuinely interested in? If not, then is it really worth the torture? I felt tortured going to Uni and wasnt passionate about my subjects, so even though i graduated with honours, i wish I didnt go. I could have done other things i cared about over those years and worked at making friends, instead of feeling trapped in the school settings everyday.

 

[Foliddudoute]

Uni.

Thank you for your reply.

It's a relief to hear you use the word 'tortured'. Thats exactly how I feel here. And I feel like such a freak... I look at all the other students at University and they all look like they haven't a care in the World. They show up to every lecture. They get their essays in on time. They still find time to go our partying. I hide in bed/the library/the campus cafe, promising myself it'll be different next time.

I've missed so many lectures that my tutors told me today that I'd pretty much already failed.
My housemates tell me not to give in yet. They enourage me to go and see my personal tutor, see if they'll let me have some time.

I think about leaving. But I have no idea what I'd do instead. It was always the plan to go to University. My dad would be so angry and disappointed in me, he'd never get over it. I'm feeling really lost and hopeless right now.

It's encouraging to hear that you got through it - though it saddens me to hear that you wish you hadn't gone.