Social Anxiety Advocates?

[nicole1]

Who advocates for us? Like there are programs for many disorders but it seems ours aren't really helped. I mean, yea there are clinics but I think that with jobs and with education, there should be a bit more help there. Like there are advances in technology that could benefit us. We wouldn't have to miss classes because of a fear of being around others. We could have programs that help us with jobs, so that we won't have to quit due to the pressures...

Why don't we have that?

 

[Moo]

I feel the same way a lot of the time. In the past (and still sometimes now) I've felt angry or upset that someone didn't pick up on my problems when I was younger and maybe could have offered me some support. I literally don't know why no one tried to help me when I was a child. It's kind of different now that I'm an adult because I'm learning to help myself. I guess I'm a little bitter in that respect. You have to be positive though I suppose. If there were systems which were set up which meant we never (or rarely) had to face our fears, we'd probably never conquer them because we wouldn't have to try. I'm kind of rambling.

I totally agree though. I wish there was more help although mainly I wish more people were aware and understanding of social anxiety - especially teachers and employers.

 

[nicole1]

I agree with your rambles. This whole thing has been a struggle. I've been trying to do the right thing and only depend on me, but I'm at the point that I'm just too broken to keep going on like this.

I've struggled at University and I've struggled whenever I had jobs. I admitted I had a problem and it's like the help is so slow. I know I'm impatient but I think I have a right to be.

I am also bitter about it. I was picked on more the worst things became for me. It's like having this disorder is a joke to some people. I feel like I've had to try twice as hard for anything. And even having things I worked hard for, I crumbled because I was unable to maintain due to my disorder...

But with so many options that wouldn't harm anyone, I think they should be used to our benefit. No one can help us but someone that's like us, who understands what it's like to go through this. Some folks go without ever having a job or go without finishing even the most minimal of education levels. That should not be, especially when there are tools that can help us.

 

[theslowesthand]

Growing up, there was practically no system at all for helping people like us. I can recall about 2 or 3 times during my school years, that sby (teacher) suggested I "talk to someone". But due to having by then (~8-9 yrs old), developed extreme pessimism/hopelesness, I didn't bother. And I did actually talk to a school councellor one time, later on (due to a teacher referring me), but I was & felt way "too far gone" by then for it to help at all (I needed "professional" help, not just a school councellor). But almost all people (teachers, pupils, family, relatives) just passed it off as 'oh, he's just a shy kid', and left it at that.

So yes, I did "slip through" the system (or lack of one), well-and-truly 100%. And for a time (esp when "s**t-hit-fan" starting in my early 20s) I was very very bitter about it.

It was only when I started getting heavily into self-help books/stuff, and began making some very minor improvements, that I also began to take responsibility for my life & my problems, for the first time in my life (before then I had blamed life, others, been bitter, angry, etc)

And it doesn't seem things have gotten much better in the last 20 or 30 years. So then, as per usual, the only people who can help the SA child, is themselves. But the problem as I found, is that at that age they haven't really got the "tools" to do so. And so they end up suffering in silence, for years and years and years.
But who knows, maybe some day the "system" will improve??

 

[nicole1]

I hope their will be. I remember simply thinking I was crazy and I just came up with coping mechanisms that would allow me to do what was needed to be done. But as things got worse, I could no longer rely on them. I had no choice but to open up about it. By then, I messed up a super great opportunity I had for myself and failed a few classes that involved social interactions or because I couldn't focus due to depression. That's when I realized that someone has to stand up for us, even if it's just us standing up for those who suffer and need the help. There are so many tools that could be given.

I've written articles for things like camps for people who have disorders like Phenylketonuria and another for this marathon for multiple sclerosis. I think awareness and programs allow these people to function in their daily lives. They have job assistance and the camp allowed children with similar disorders get to know each other and have fun in an environment that didn't set limitations for their disorders or disabilities.

From what I know from experience and from what I've heard from others, a lot of the time, people with SAD or SP suffer in silence, are often more depressed than not, and struggle with things like school and getting, keeping and maintaining jobs.

I think advocacy groups could be very useful for people like us. No one should have to suffer the way I did. I wouldn't wish this on others. Except so that they can see or understand what this disorder is and how it impacts our lives.