Safe Sex

[Thankful6389]

Please delete if not allowed!

My boyfriend and I have been together for over a year now. We both are ready to have sex. We both want to do lots of reseach and all before hand. Any sites that you'd recommend? We want to make it as safe as possible. Thanks.[/b]

 

[Emma]

I have no idea, I'm an inexperienced hermit.....How old are you? :?

 

[Thankful6389]

We're both 17, which is probably too young, but we're both ready.

 

[kazzaa]

hi, if you feel ready then its fine i think. 17 is ok. you dont really need sites tho, you will be ok just experimenting with eachother, just use precautions and have fun. things just come naturally if you feel comfortable with eachother. as time goes on you will do more and more..just relax and enjoy!! :roll:

 

[crazyfairyx]

If you've been together for a year and you're totally sure that you're ready then there's no reason why you shouldn't.

Have you done other intimate things? Masturbating each other, oral, or just being naked together? I think sex is something that should be worked up to over time, if you just jumped into bed together having no clue how to please each other, sex will be a huge disapointment usually. But if over a few months you learn how to get really good at foreplay and spend time just experimenting with how to please each other it'll be a lot better. (Sorry I know that's not what you asked, but I ramble )

Anyway, having safe sex isn't particularly difficult, if you can speak to a doctor then you could go on the pill (anything you tell them would be confidential and most likely all your doc will do is check your blood pressure) and / or use condoms. Condoms are easy to use (in every pack of durex there's an instruction guide that is more useful than most sex ed classes lol) and they're very effective as long as they are used properly.

If you do a search on this forum http://messageboards.ivillage.co.uk/iv-ukrlsex/start you'll find loads of good information

 

[Thankful6389]

We've done oral before many times. We just want to research as much as possible so it's the best as possible for the best of us. It's going to hurt like hell for me since I am a virgin and all, but I am not expecting the first time to be amazing because I know it won't be. Thanks for the suggestions guys!

 

[aguppylife]

Why is everyone in such a rush to do things these days. Why such a hurry to grow up? How does giving yourself to this guy benefit you in the long run? The emotions put into such intimacy cannot be taken back.

 

[Carolina2]

I disagree with aguppy. I'm married - happily - and if anything, I wish I'd done it with more people while I was still single, really gotten some experiences.

Thankful sounds like she's really read and really wants to do it, and I say good for her. You're about to enter a very fulfilling, both mentally and physically, part of your life. I envy you.

 

[crazyfairyx]

Why is everyone in such a rush to do things these days. Why such a hurry to grow up? How does giving yourself to this guy benefit you in the long run? The emotions put into such intimacy cannot be taken back.

I don't think waiting a year can be called rushing really. If she feels she is ready for sex after a year and trying other sexual things then who are we to say she isn't? They're being responsible in a physical sense by making sure they are safe from STIs and pregnancy and they're being responsible emotionally because they waited until they were sure instead of rushing into bed.

 

[aguppylife]

I'm married - happily - and if anything, I wish I'd done it with more people while I was still single, really gotten some experiences

Doesn't sound so happy to me to regret such acts.


All I'm saying is I look around and I observe. Relationships aren't to be taken lightly. I come from a different background where one marries a person if they truly want a close relationship and stay married through thick and thin. I see the children that lack of self-control has unleashed onto our society.

making sure they are safe from STIs and pregnancy and

If it was only that simple of being responsible. Its not.

 

[crazyfairyx]

making sure they are safe from STIs and pregnancy and

If it was only that simple of being responsible. Its not.

You took one sentence out of the things I said, I didn't say making sure you don't get STIs or get pregnant are all it entails to be responsible.

I don't think waiting a year can be seen as entering sex lightly, you may have cultural or moral views that enforce the idea of not having sex before marriage but not everyone does and so it is unfair to force your beliefs onto them. They are clearly being sensible in all aspects of their decision to have sex and so who are we to make moral judgements on their decision?

 

[Carolina2]

I'm married - happily - and if anything, I wish I'd done it with more people while I was still single, really gotten some experiences

Doesn't sound so happy to me to regret such acts.

Don't come on here and moralize. It's unbecoming.

 

[aguppylife]

Don't come on here and moralize

Its a public forum. I'm not here to sugarcoat things for the kids. If you want to, fine. But forums are opinions. Everyone has one, and everyone is going to share one. You did and I did.

so who are we to make moral judgements on their decision?

Every decision we make in life effects us all because we all live on one planet, earth. So in theory, the decisions I make in life effect you and vice versa.

 

[Thankful6389]

Why is everyone in such a rush to do things these days. Why such a hurry to grow up? How does giving yourself to this guy benefit you in the long run? The emotions put into such intimacy cannot be taken back.

Waiting a year is not rushing. Age is just a number. We both have researched it fully and to the best of our ability. We want to be as safe as possible. Please don't preach your morals to me. It's my life, not yours.

 

[aguppylife]

Please don't preach your morals to me

And please don't come on here if you don't want other people's opinions. Go ask your parents for safe sex advice, not us. Obviously, I could have stated, if your asking such a question you are far from ready.

 

[crazyfairyx]

Please don't preach your morals to me

And please don't come on here if you don't want other people's opinions. Go ask your parents for safe sex advice, not us. Obviously, I could have stated, if your asking such a question you are far from ready.

I'm sorry but I totally disagree, they were not asking if they should go ahead with sex, they were asking about protecting themselves against pregnancy so please stop harrassing her. She may have asked for opinions but you have now given yours so please stop forcing your point because you are going too far.

 

[BrokenSmile]

Do it just if you are sure that he loves you and you love him and your relationship seems to have a bright future.
If everything is ok go to a family planning center for teens. They gonna hellp you with the best advices and pills.

 

[Thankful6389]

UPDATE:

So my boyfriend and I had sex. I was on birth control before (the shot) and we used a condom as well. It hurt like hell, but that's expected. We went really slow, took our time and he was very understanding.

 

[LittleMissMuffet]

Hi aguppylife,

I respect your values and beliefs, and I do agree with you in regards to our society being overall too free with sex and relationships.

The only way I find my self differring to you is that I think it is certainly possible for people who prefer monogamy, like you and I, to have our point of view fully respected, at the same time that we can allow other people to prefer more casual sexual relationships.

I don't believe that one way of being needs to bring down the other. It is definetly possible to have acceptance of two opposite polar approaches and beliefs regarding what defines 'relationship', all the while keeping one's own preference towards one side or the other prefectly intact. ...In fact, logically you could reverse that latter sentence to get:- a person could well keep their own preference for what a relationship means, having an acceptance of two opposite polar values about what sex and relationship are about. -And, if not, why not?

 

[Emma]

HELLO!!!!
This is NOT sexworld!!!!
This is socila phobia world!!!!
IS ANYONE GOING TO POINT THAT OUT????!!!
STOP TELLING ABOUT YOUR SEX LIFE, IF YOU HAVEN'T GOT SOCIAL PHOIBA DON'T COME ON HERE AND USE IT AS YOUR OWN PERSONAL MY SEX DETAILS SPOT
(By the way I'm not judgemental, I just thought I'd point that out) :roll:

AGAIN This is Not sex world!!! OK? :x