SA and age

[Jannah]

I am 21 and for some reason I always seem to get along better with people who are way older than me, 30s 40s and older. In my last full time job my co worker who was also my close friend was 57 years old, and we were so close. We took every break together, had long conversations mostly about intellectual stuff and life in general, we even had our share of disagreements and arguments just like any other friendship.

I can never seem to connect or click with people around my age and of course its around people my age that I feel the most uncomfortable. It just seems like a lot of young people are immature, superficial, judgmental, shallow, and insensitive. I'm in college now and a lot of students are around 17 or 18, I speak to some of them because I'm there everyday and have classes with them, but sometimes I tell my self why do I even bother, I'm there to get my degree, sure it would be nice to make a friend, but I never had much luck finding people my own age to hang out with or be friends with. I know not all young people are like this, obviously I'm one. Can anyone relate or understand how I'm feeling?

 

[Lorraine Manca]

yes. I can definately relate to that. i'm your age and im the same way. I dont understand it though. Maybe older folks are more laid back? or have a longer attention span maybe, so you have more time to think. I get along much better with my professors, and the older students, than with the classmates my age. I had a friendship like the one you described with a funny old man in his 70's.

 

[lurknomore]

I'm kind of the same way, only it goes for older and younger people. I think in my case, it goes beyond just age though, I find it easier around people who are different from me in general- different age, gender, race, etc. Maybe it's because it's easier for me to compare myself to people and feel like I don't "match up" to people that I'm supposed to be more similar to, and I feel like around kids, older people, males, and those of a different race or ethnicity there's less basis for comparison and judgment.

I used to think that I didn't get along with my "peers" because of different maturity levels, interests, etc., which may still be true to an extent, but I've found that you really can't assume people are immature or just plain incompatible with you just based on a factor like age- some 22 year olds are more mature than some of the 40 year olds out there.