I wake up and some days get the feeling that this is going to be one those difficult days where everything goes wrong. Not that I've already screwed up but that it's bound to happen during the day. It's such a harsh burden to bear^^.
This is very unfortunate that your experience in life has led you to this kind of thinking.
However, you owe it to yourself to go out there and try some new things and see what can happen! Good things can and do happen to those who keep working at it and stay patient.
If I were you, I would go and talk to a counselor because this is greatly harming your life. I saw a counselor once and it totally turned my life around, so I would strongly recommend it!
Just remember that while things may be shitty right now, they can and will get better if you keep working to improve your life!
Usually feel fυcked before I even wake up. Or well, I don't know about that, but soon after I awaken from my slumber. The reason why it feels so fυcked up is because it's just a continuation from the day before, which was probably pretty fυcked up. When you realize that the day your living in is just a repeat of so many days before it, it really doesn't seem alll that special. It's not a "brand new day", it's just continuing from where it was left off at. If you were nowhere, then bang you're still nowhere. It goes on and on and on. bOiNg.
I've been struggling without having a normal sleep cycle for the past two weeks, and getting up past 3pm in the afternoon on occasions. Call it depression, weakness from dealing with SA half of my life, or what-have-you. I just don't want to face the day sometimes.
I have difficulty FALLING asleep. My mind simply will not rest, and I have 101 things going through my brain at once. I think of past failures, past hurts, regrets, and even past relationships that have no affect on my life today. It just doesn't make any sense! I keep re-living painful moments in my mind, and I don't want to; it's not like I make myself to do it. They just start to flow in, and I begin to cry.