r we born shy?
- Thread starter lily
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Phoenixx
Well-known member
Shyness is a personality trait, whereas anxiety is a disorder, although both can go hand in hand and sometimes do, but isn't always the case. Just because someone is shy doesn't mean they have an anxiety disorder. If someone has an anxiety disorder that doesn't exactly mean they're a shy person at heart either. In my case, I was born shy. It's an inherited trait for me from my father. I didn't inherit my mother's social butterfly extroverted personality. The wonderful social anxiety and generalized anxiety to go with it is also inherited from both of my parents (SA from dad, GA from mom) and of course well-developed from my own personal life experiences.
While looks can help boost confidence, confidence itself doesn't change someone being shy. Being confident in your looks definitely helps make you feel like you don't have to hide your face, but it doesn't make you into an open book -- or at least from my own experience. I don't feel any better or willing to go and talk to new random people or walk through crowds even if I feel good with my hair done and makeup on.
While diet can have an impact on mental health, even as a child, I really don't think it's such a sole influence towards the development of any disorders, unless of course you were severely malnourished to the point where you weren't meeting ANY daily values of any vitamins or minerals and even then that would come with its own physical abnormalities too. Diet is merely just a small piece of the complex puzzle of your genetics.
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but a healthy diet and taking any sort of omegas will not cure your anxiety. It MAY help, but the anxiety will still be there. Trust me, I know. I eat a pretty healthy diet myself -- low fat, fresh fruits and veg everyday and organic when possible, mostly lean protein with the occasional red meats once or twice a week, zero refined grains and a focus on whole grains, low refined sugar, no soda, no caffeine, and I drink water every day. I also take vit D, vit B complex, fish oil, calcium/magnesium/zinc combo supplement every morning on top of my anxiety medication. I have some food restrictions so I supplement to fill in the gaps. But even with all of that I still deal with the anxiety everyday. I deal with it better doing all of this, to where it's A LOT more tolerable and I can actually live my life, but it's not a cure by any means. I still cannot go into crowded places or travel to new places by myself. Large crowds still make me dizzy and I can't focus, even if I'm with someone else. Hectic times in my life still sometimes keeps me up at night or wakes me up with a racing mind in the early hours of the morning. But like I said, it's much more tolerable now. But I really think the key is diet AND medication. Not one or the other.
I thought shyness is shy with any possible thing that comes your way. For example, if you're not very confident with your appearance then it won't affect you being shy. I'm b/t anxious to regular so shy is in there in the middle range too. I've inherited the shy prone-to-anxiety introvert. I wonder if being an extrovert is better but if you're an extrovert, is it that you won't pay attention inwardly or how you look?
Phoenixx
Well-known member
Extroversion is just being outgoing. I wouldn't say you don't pay attention to how you look at all or your inner self, because everyone cares to some extent about their appearance, their presence, and how they present themselves -- some more than others -- whether they're introverted or extroverted.
Hoth
1
There's a hereditary aspect for some people, and not for others. Being raised by the people you inherited from is often a bigger influence.
Personally, I think there has to be a genetic component in my case for many reasons. Both of my parents were unusually shy kids -- but not as extreme as I was as a kid. And they both grew out of it as teenagers, whereas I didn't. My very earliest memories are my very most anxious ones (first day of preschool was hell), and I've been told I was very afraid of strangers and of my grandparents when I was too young to remember. And I didn't experience any abuse or traumatic events (unless the existence of people counts as a trauma), so I think I had to have been born anxious.
And of course anxiety can be a natural instinctual thing. We had a socially anxious cat once who spent her days hiding in the bushes. Every social animal needs to experience some degree of occasional social anxiety to be safe, so there are bound to be cases of genetic misfires that become extreme.
But I'd have to say that for the majority of humans with social anxiety there are other larger factors.
Personally, I think there has to be a genetic component in my case for many reasons. Both of my parents were unusually shy kids -- but not as extreme as I was as a kid. And they both grew out of it as teenagers, whereas I didn't. My very earliest memories are my very most anxious ones (first day of preschool was hell), and I've been told I was very afraid of strangers and of my grandparents when I was too young to remember. And I didn't experience any abuse or traumatic events (unless the existence of people counts as a trauma), so I think I had to have been born anxious.
And of course anxiety can be a natural instinctual thing. We had a socially anxious cat once who spent her days hiding in the bushes. Every social animal needs to experience some degree of occasional social anxiety to be safe, so there are bound to be cases of genetic misfires that become extreme.
But I'd have to say that for the majority of humans with social anxiety there are other larger factors.
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Hm, I'm not sure what you mean by larger factors but I definitely think there are other factors interconnected with social anxiety. For example, bullying, and being brought up under weak foundations so when the circumstances like bullying hit on the spot that's weak, u just fall down -- these can be seen as larger factors since it paints a bigger picture to the smaller picture or outcome.
Hoth
1
Bullying is probably the most common for those who develop social anxiety at adolescence. Could also be child abuse, parental friction/divorce, an injury, a move to a new city/country, any number of other traumas. Generally some sort of traumatic event or period for most people, though, from what I've heard (but not for me).
child abuse and an injury would go under PTSD
I just didn't seem to be able to connect social anxiety with the things you mentioned but now can see a connection b/t one that you mentioned, child abuse, people who have experienced child abuse can have problems in social situations bc they might feel unable to open up and it's possible to have anxiety bc they don't want others to know they've been child abused. I couldn't find a connection or scenarios b/t or of social anxiety and injuries. That I would just put under PTSD, do you have an example? Parental friction/divorce can kind of possibly cause social anxiety since your foundation is being divided and moving to a new city/country can cause social anxiety for a while or depending on how others treat you in the new setting and since you're meeting new people.
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Hoth
1
lily said:
Sometimes it's because of the huge life disruption and period of isolation while recovering or the general caution/avoidance it triggers. I've heard of people suddenly becoming much more anxious around people after they recover from a car accident that takes weeks to convalesce. But there are also brain injuries that can directly cause anxiety (though probably general anxiety in most cases).
For some people it was triggered by the recent pandemic even though they weren't sick, just because of the lifestyle changes they had a hard time reversing.
