putting up walls/fear of rejection

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springblossumbuds

New member
Has anyone ever put a wall up after getting to know someone or starting to make a new friend? I've had this problem since forever and can't seem to end it. As soon as I've gotten to know them a little more, I don't know what to say, so I back down and eventually disappear. I'm also afraid of being ignored or rejected, so I ignore them first, which probably isn't the way to go about it but its been my only defense against being hurt. I hate being ignored more than anything.

By backing down, I don't make or keep many friends. Is there anyone else who puts a wall up or can't seem to get close to people? :S
 
DeadmanWalking

DeadmanWalking

Well-known member
Well, it does hurt to be rejected, I'll agree with you on that. But, don't you think you're making people feel the same way you feel when you back away and disappear from their lives? It's scary out there and you will be rejected, there's no way around it or to avoid it except to completely detach yourself from the entire human population, but can you live like that and be happy? Right now, you need to work on strengthening yourself and putting some faith in yourself and the human race. Have faith that you're an interesting person to know and faith that not everyone will reject or hurt you. Next time someone tries to be your friend, stay with them, no matter how scared you get. In fact, you could explain your situation to them; I'm sure that they will understand and try to help you through this.

I've put up more walls than I wanted to. I've put up walls between my family, my friends, the world, and my heart. All I was left with was misery and sadness and that's no way to live, don't you agree? So, I'm trying to break down those walls and let people into my heart and see me for who I really am. I'll get rejected, sure, and it'll hurt; in fact, I just got hurt in the past. But, I've got to (and so do you) get back up again and try and remember, "The fault isn't entirely with me, sometimes, I haven't done anything wrong. The fault also lies within them".
 
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