Problem with women ...anyone else?

[Shyguy4]

I have this problem where if I hear that a women likes me or is interested in me I feel like it's not true unless I heard it from her myself and I also notice that I get anxious when I socialize and I usually keep to myself especially around women for some reason they come off as more intimidating when I have S.A. so when it comes around to hooking up with them I always believe that once they get to know me personally and see my true personality that they will not like me because they started liking me when I was quiet.

I don't know if you guys understand what I just said but feels real to me and I can't convince myself that this isn't real because it sounds reasonable.

 

[Klaus]

Women doesn't like shy, coward man.
They are just teasing you to feel good about themselves.

 

[footballfan]

I know exactly what you mean, I'm in a new relationship, and I'm starting to come out my shell now. I'm worried she probably prefered me when I was shy and nervous.
She also says, she is worried I'm gonna start flirting with girls and leave her if I get too confident. So some girls might prefer you to stay shy!

 

[Nack]

For me it's usually the wild, outgoing, extroverted females that makes me nervous/intimediated. But, for some reason, i have no problem with shy girls at all. If I have a chance to talk to them 1 on 1, eventually i would say a line. heh

 

[Liesha27]

With me, I prefer guys/girls who keep to themselves. Outgoing/extroverted guys make me nervous! I think there are alot of benefits of being shy because most shy people don't get into alot of trouble as the outgoing do. Not that theres anything wrong with being outgoing.

 

[TooShyShy]

Thank you for starting this post OP!!!

I have a shy guy i am crazy about at work..i even made him cookies for him for the holidays and gave them to him with a really nice card today..letting him know i thought he was special, and that i thought enough to make him a batch of cookies..especially for him!!!!

Now, he was told by a mutual friend last year that i like him and think he's sweet and a great guy and i was told that he never responded to her..and when she asked about his feelings for me and how he treats me differently then anyone else in the building HE WOULDN'T ANSWER HER he just put his head down..then he waited a few minutes and was like i'm dating and busy and etc.

She got the feeling he was scared and making stuff up....he is very shy and highly anxious around me and me only. A friend told me she doesnt think he has EVER had a girlfriend and doesn't have much experience with romantic relationships at all.

Now my question is, even with someone telling him - its not enough????

He has been told that i know for sure and ever since then, he has been trying..saying hello everyday and he says my name everytime he says hello..does that mean something??? I never hear him say anyone elses name!!!

I also noticed he hasn't gone away since he was told..if anything he is around me more now then before..he follows me around a lot and stares when i am walking..or when he thinks i don;t look. He finaly started making eye contact with me and can talk to me....but always looks so scared!!!!!!!!!

Is my being friendly not enough???? And what can i do to make him relax around me..he can't seem to smile or relax when we talk, but yet he us so relaxed around all the other women int he building..with me its like he forgets to breathe!!!

I would love any advice you may have.

 

[weak]

so when it comes around to hooking up with them I always believe that once they get to know me personally and see my true personality that they will not like me because they started liking me when I was quiet.

What's your true personality? Some people are nice at first, but once you get to know em, they're total pricks. Is this what you mean?

Anyway everyones shy at first. The fun part about getting to know someone is when you reach that point where you both start to open up. Generally it only gets better from there, so I'd assume if a girl likes the quiet you, she'll like the real you all the same.

 

[Shyguy4]

so when it comes around to hooking up with them I always believe that once they get to know me personally and see my true personality that they will not like me because they started liking me when I was quiet.

What's your true personality? Some people are nice at first, but once you get to know em, they're total pricks. Is this what you mean?

Anyway everyones shy at first. The fun part about getting to know someone is when you reach that point where you both start to open up. Generally it only gets better from there, so I'd assume if a girl likes the quiet you, she'll like the real you all the same.

I see what you're saying it makes sense ..thanks for helping me out with understanding my situation.

 

[no1]

yeah I dont know what it is. When some girl SUPPOSEDLY 'likes' me I am unsure whether it's true or not. I could feel offended, thinking the girl is just playing with my head. or I'm just too scared to respond for fear of what I just mentioned.

 

[Spfreezes]

You must be joking. I have never had a gf in all my life and I bet there is a lot of guys who are the same.

 

[Ventrilo]

ya why would a girl ever date me anyways i'm a piece of shit