Perfection

[Loopy_Lil]

hi
Does anyone else here feel like they have to be perfect?
Everything I say and do has to be perfect. I don't do it if I don't think that I'll be perfect.
I feel so alone.
I have to be perfect so no one can see the real imperfect me.
thanks for your thoughts
Lil

 

[IceLad]

I certainly have to make myself look perfect before I even think about venturing out of the front door.

 

[Scottish_Player]

I need things to be perfect and tidy,i dislike clutter and mess it drives me mad :roll:

 

[BrownEyes]

re:

I dont just feel I have to be perfect, I know I have to. The world doesnt like people who are not perfect, even if they pretend they do.

I hate the way I look. Its the number one reason I cannot stand anyone, even my family members looking at me.

 

[Toad]

Yup everything I do must be perfect. Takes me forever to do stuff because of this, and it makes me stress out about everything.

 

[Crimefish]

Well, technically, I don't feel I have to be perfect, I feel pressured to be the same as everyone else. Society hates diversity.
I'm more comfortable with accepting my flaws than I used to be. I like drawing, so I got an account at an art community. You post your pictures and people comment/critique. I've slowly taught myself to be proud of any minor progress, instead of waiting to be perfect (which will never happen). I'm also better at taking criticism now.
"You suck, Crimefish!" "Okay, you're entitled to your opinion... ya jackass."
Skin like a rhino, me.

 

[GettingThere]

We are a complex bunch and perfectionism is a part of the psyche as a general rule.

Another part is that most of us are procrastinators.

 

[esp]

yeah, having to be perfect is why I avoid things. I'm afraid I'll say the wrong thing or do the wrong thing. I think its the consequences I'm afraid of like being teased or laughed at or rejected. But I think people would rather know the real you rather than some perfect person. Do you feel comfortable around a perfect person?

 

[Loopy_Lil]

thanks all for your thoughts
I am definately also a big time procrastinator
I avoid doing things until the last minute so that I have a reason for it not to be perfect
does anyone else do this?
I guess it's what people will think that makes me want to be perfect although I have always had unrealistic expectations of myself

I'm currently studying and never seem to manage to get my assignments in on time I actually failed two of my subjects last semester partly because of this and am on my way to failing this semesters subjects as well
Anyone with ideas on ways to get assignments done or at least started would be really helpful
thanks heaps

 

[black_mamba]

I'm currently studying and never seem to manage to get my assignments in on time I actually failed two of my subjects last semester partly because of this and am on my way to failing this semesters subjects as well
Anyone with ideas on ways to get assignments done or at least started would be really helpful
thanks heaps

You didn't say why you failed, did you simply not manage the time well or did something else get in the way? I really enjoy that feeling of satisfaction after finishing my assignments to a standard I think is good - it helps to look forward to that feeling before starting out. I picture receiving my work back and feeling proud of the grade I got.

Do you think something like that will help?

Regarding the perfection question; yes I am fully aware of the pressure to be this perfect person in all respects; looks, career, university grades, relationships, family. I am aware but try not to succumb to the pressue. I just live by my standards, and similar to Crimefish I'm ok with critisism and love making progress.

Something thats really bitten me at the moment is how long its taking me to learn to drive, I feel bad in comparison to other people, but if I look back at all the progress I've made on my own (without the comparisons) I feel ok.

Plus yor going into muddy territory as each person's definition of perfection is different. Who's to say what is perfect; maybe we're all bringing this on ourselves.
:lol:

 

[Tim001]

Here's the big question:

Are you a perfectionist to satisfy yourself, or to satisfy others? Or both? I'm not much of a perfectionist when it comes to doing things for myself, but I am an extreme perfectionist when it comes to satisfying others lest they find a flaw in the way I do things. 8O

 

[lostindarkness]

I need things to be perfect and tidy,i dislike clutter and mess it drives me mad :roll:

I am exactly like this!!! I am such an organized and neat person and get upset when things are messy or disorganized. It is quite a bad habit of mine. People always tease me about this, especially when it comes to my bedroom. It has to be really clean, and my bed never has any wrinkles in it. I get bugged about this a lot but I cannot help it. I sort of have an obsession of being neat with everything.

 

[annie]

Re: re:

I dont just feel I have to be perfect, I know I have to. The world doesnt like people who are not perfect, even if they pretend they do.

I hate the way I look. Its the number one reason I cannot stand anyone, even my family members looking at me.

Browneyes,

Wow you are certainly putting alot of pressure on yourself saying "The world doesn't like people who are not perfect".

Who gives a shit what the world things. No one is perfect, absolutely no one.

annie :wink:

 

[maggie]

i also hate clutter and mess...it makes me very uneasy...even if there are like 2 forks and one plate in the sink, i will wash them... :roll:

 

[Yossarian]

I used to be very much a perfectionist but I've replaced it with apathy and indifference. They are much easier to achieve, yet surprisingly hard to master.

 

[Scottish_Player]

Iam only after pulling my room apart today,i took everything out the drawers and wardrobe only to put it all back in the same place,i just get a need sometimes to do that just to make sure everything is in order :roll:
Everything gets flung onto my bed and then sorted and arranged back in a specific place all neat and tidy even although it was ok in the first place,its stange though cause after i have done it i get a sense of relief like i can relax :wink:

 

[pitkreet]

People used to think I was big-headed, but now I'm perfect....


b-boom tschh !!

 

[Yossarian]

hehe. I used to be an egg head but then I cracked. It's no yolk.

 

[Pearl]

Good luck with your study Lil. I found studying hard with my high anxiety levels, but got through it all fortunately. At the time it was a real strain though. Try to prioritise topics and try not to procrasinate would be my tips.

 

[IcanDoIt]

SEE? thats the problem with SA..

we just have to be perfect! i used to be that way, and a little of of it still exist inside me..

we are scared to meet people cos we know we have to be perfect to make them like us, and we just cant be perfect..

we see others converse and having fun among their friends and we consider them perfect..

basically, we think too much..