Passed Anxiety... Now Just Weird

[powerfulthoughts]

When I got my first job, I was terribly nervous when people would try to talk to me. Literally I would be shaking and my mind would start racing. It was really awful.

Having been dealing with this for a few years now, I seem to have gotten passed the anxiety part, and now I just feel weird and disconnected from people. I just feel like when I talk to people, I have this strange sense that I am totally different from them in every way. It's like they don't respect me at all. I feel like that song from Radiohead called 'creep.' I just feel so weird and odd and I don't know why.

I can chalk it up to low self-esteem, but I don't know how to bring positive re-enforcements to myself when I can't find anybody to give them.

/rant

 

[Richey]

Radiohead are gods!
i feel for people who have yet to experience hearing The Bends through to In Rainbows run of their great 6 albums and all the B-sides and covers, rarities....they really are a musicians dream band..

yeh i agree about the weird aspect of it ...but i believe that is only because you just don't relate to everyone which is fine and to be expected ...if everyone was the same how boring would that be?
just because you arn't that actively social doesnt make you ..what makes you is just you being interested and working hard, that's it ...i find that alot of the weird moments at work actually are caused more by the other person speaking to me who decided to make a conversation awkward or they choose to think that silences are awkward, or they make it awkward by how they are talking and using words which makes me feel anxious, which is my fault for letting them make me feel anxious ....

its all perception ...if you change your perception you'll change your attitude as well.
if you are linking negativity to awkwardness or pauses in conversations or whatever then you will feeling crap all the time ....you need to re-arrange the way you internalise the outside world...if you are focussing on feeling and being nervous or awkward then you'll end up feeling and behaving more shakey and anxious like ...try to change your focus..and research some basic conversation starters and mix that with trying to be as enthusiastic as you can but in a relaxed way ...just feel confident in yourself and it will show to the outside world, that will take some practice and focus but its better then just repeating the same behavioural patterns without trying to break the trend..

now how do i judge people? i don't really think of anyone negatively even if they are quiet or don't go out much ...i don't care, it doesnt make me feel that they are unworthy, so i like to believe alot of people are the same way like me and thats why alot of people are interested in psychology and why people behave the way they do, we need to judge less and perceive more ...