ChristmasElf
New member
I am glad to read about others that have OCD and what they are obsessive about. Up until recently I had no idea what I had was OCD i just thought i was weird and if i told anyone they would look at me like im nuts. If i am out with my fiancee driving i have to count every single letter on a sign as we are driving by it or on shop signs and windows... If i get a thought in my head i cant stop thinking about it until i act on it and do what im thinking of.. sometimes if i dont want to do something i get the most horrid thoughts in my head that something will happen to my kids if i dont do it... if i turn off a light switch i have to keep touching it until i know it is turned off... when i shut a door i have to push on it until i know it is shut... I constantly have thoughts that my fiancee is cheating on me and I constantly have to check his emails and search for him on dating sites and scour our computer for hours to see if he is hiding anything on there that he doesnt want me to see... Whenever we are going out somewhere I have to constantly check that everything is locked up at least 3 or 4 times and then when we are out i am constantly thinking about if everything was locked up when we left and always asking my fiancee...
If someone does some housework for me i have to go over it again to make sure it is clean. and when my fiancee took clothes down to the laundromat once when our machine broke down i was in tears the whole time when he left and just sat there staring out the window till he came back cause i was worried he wouldnt do them properly... The horrid thoughts i have about my kids or others and that they will die or get hurt if i dont do something that really scares me and i have to shake my head to get the thoughts out of there...
I am just so sick of this but im scared to get help too incase they want to lock me away....
If someone does some housework for me i have to go over it again to make sure it is clean. and when my fiancee took clothes down to the laundromat once when our machine broke down i was in tears the whole time when he left and just sat there staring out the window till he came back cause i was worried he wouldnt do them properly... The horrid thoughts i have about my kids or others and that they will die or get hurt if i dont do something that really scares me and i have to shake my head to get the thoughts out of there...
I am just so sick of this but im scared to get help too incase they want to lock me away....