Not quite sure what kind of symptom this is

[rko74]

I went to a job skills workshop today, it lasted from 9am-330pm.I initially went in feeling not too bad, but i notice when i sit and and listen to the instructor i get uncomfortable when she looks at me.Like shes gonna she through my soul "feeling" and see that i hopelessly scared of people.Anyway i notice my discomfort builds and kinda peaks more when i try to talk etc.I tried talking to the guy next to me a bit i think i did pretty good.But in the back of my mind i was saying to myself "god what if he sees my "fear" and thinks im strange.Also i notice i really dont have confidence in my voice{im soft spoken}.I guess my worst fear would be if a was talking to someone and my voice breaks up or just get too emotionally overwelmed and start to burst into tears.

I get this symptom that i cant quite figure out what it is, i get the overwhelming feeling that i will loose control.I put my hand up to my mouth and chin and get this feeling like im going to fall or do something really embarassing such as start shaking.Its like that sensation when your sleeping and feel like your falling and jump up awake.That feeling of loosing control.So i squirm in my seat and try to bury it and cope with the feeling as best as i can.I notice this when i go out and eat in public, like say im going to take a bite of food.My mind says like "what if i loose control and drop my food".Like your carrying a cup of tea in a foodcourt and you think everyone is watching you carry that cup, and your frightened of dropping the cup and loosing self control.

I know it sounds weird but its just one of my symptoms i get in my mind

 

[Chilling__Echo]

i think alot of it is you're so worried about looking out of the ordinary and thinking about every move you make so much that it seems unnatural. i know that whenever i had to do a presentation at school, when i was finished and going to my seat, i felt like i was going to fall. like my feet would trip over themselves so i would take every step so carefully and i felt dizzy. i think anxiety just has that affect. it turns our brains haywire, i think we end up thinking ourselves to death :|

try and focus on what the speaker is saying rather than on the moves you're making. nobody is paying that much attention to you. even if one person thinks you're out of the ordinary, or *weird*, why should it matter? maybe they should be worrying about what you think of them

 

[rko74]

Yeah

Yeah i think im scared of being perceived as different, yeah i get caught up in myself and i cant focus on what the person is saying.Funny i remember this feeling begining in grade 6, the teacher would take about the dangers of drugs and i was always paranoid if he thought i took drugs lol.Its really weird how these thoughts come about in your head.Its almost like you dont have control over your own mind at times.I guess its not the end of the world if people look at you and see that deer in headlights gaze on your face haha.Its just very embarassing to admit or say your scared of people.

 

[Chilling__Echo]

you'd be suprised how many people had the same fear - fearing what people think about you. being judged. i'm sure if everyone was sure (as sure as we are) that people were judging them all the time, they'd be just as fearful.

but we can't control how we think, we were born this way. we can't help it. it's a disorder :| it just takes practice, pushing the negative habit thoughts out and replacing them with what's rational. it takes alot of work, time, patience, and courage, but it can be done. just don't let yourself even start thinking about the person next to you, and think about what you're thinking! is every person really thinking such bad things about you? all the time? i know you know that's not true. try and force the truth in your head and it gets easier over time. it won't happen overnight, but you don't have to suffer forever