need someone to help me

[littleone126]

Okay so I really need someone to help me out- support me- give me some advice. I really dont feel like i can go to anyone to talk to them about this; those who I have told in the past are sick of hearing about it or want to take such drastic measures that would involve changing my entire life- turning it upside down.

basically I am a college student- living on my own- this probably has been the most detrimental thing because I have all day to obsess and ritualize. I have been suffering from OCD since I was 7 years old- i grew up in a chaotic house hold and psychologists determined I would ritualize because my rituals were the only thing I could control in my life. However, those rituals have subsided- i no longer am constantly checking on things and organizing things precisely. however, my OCD has manifested itself in a much more serious form.

ever since I moved into my own place [and not living with a room mate] I have obsessed over restricting food. I only allow myself to eat up to 675 calories a day- and only eat the same things day in and day out. i eat at the same time everyday and have stopped going out because of that [because for example I HAVE to eat my dinner at 9 at night so either i have to wait until after im done eating dinner [which is turkey breast and applesauce] or i will rush back to my apartment to be home by then- limiting my time to spend w friends] the only time i go out with my friends is during the day because i go from noon to 9 without eating so i have my entire day free. i wont eat in public. i only eat infront of a select few. if someone invites me to go out to a party and it falls within my "eating schedule" i'll tell them im "busy". its really made me a homebody and now my freinds r getting bored of just hanging around my apt because "i have to eat dinner then" . worst of all i am down to 86 lbs..and am continuing to loose weight [I was 125 at the start of this]. everyone is worried about me- i am worried about myself.

if you have any advice please- help me.

 

[Moloch]

I'm not sure how to help.

I suggest you to eat. Try and go out and eat at Mc' Donald or wherever the hell you want with your friends. Accept the worst. Anything.
Sometimes the best way to get over something is by accepting the worst case scenario.

Go out and eat. Be afraid. World's a scary place.

 

[Rockhopper]

I've been reading some books on Cognitive Behaviour Therapy for OCD. I'm not a doctor but these things have been helpful to me.

It's about exposure and response prevention. You need to expose yourself to those situations. Maybe in your case not being home when you're supposed to eat and exposing yourself to eating different foods at different times. You must not respond to your OCD impulses. You will probably feel extremely anxious but you've got to stay in that situation until the anxiety subsides. This can take between 20 mins and 3 hours.

Maybe start small and just not be home at those certain times. Book an appointment or something like the hairdressers. Then you are forced not to go home and you're breaking the cycle. Then slowly change the foods you have at home, to break that routine.

Other things from this book that I've found helpful are thinking what I was like before I had OCD. What were my behaviors? Also it suggests, think if you had and OCD free twin. What would your OCD free twin do in this situation? For example yours would hang out with your friends without being restricted by meal times, it would eat a variety of foods etc.

Remember you have the right to be happy. You have the right to eat what you want, when you want. You have the right to hang out with your friends whenever you want, to go to a party all night long. OCD doesn't have the right to take your rights away.

Hope you find this helpful.

 

[Noca]

Zyprexa is the strongest appetite stimulant I know of. It made me go from 108 lbs 5'10" to 155 lbs 5'10". Only downside is it can cause diabetes type 2 if your not cafeful.

May wanna seek an eating disorders clinic as well.

 

[dooby-duck]

I have some issues with food as part of my OCD too. I'm not rigid on the times or anything but on what I eat. This only affects what I eat and drink during the day at work. I have to eat the same thing, and drink the same amount every day. I have to dispose of the wrappers in a certain way as well. Away from work I'm free to eat and drink whatever I like.