Name Calling
- Thread starter Dorothy
- Start date
Horatio
Well-known member
socratic said:
its a good idea in theory, something that counsellors suggested that I should try when I was being bullied at school
the result was me being shoved against the wall and kicked multiple times, public humiliation when the next time they spotted me they announced to the crowd gathered there that I felt bad when they teased me, was then told that not only was it my place in life to be made to feel bad but in fact there was no room in life for me at all and that I deserved to be killed. was then shoved against the wall and beaten up by several of the guys while their girlfriends applauded from the sidelines
I didnt try that approach again although perhaps in some situations it could work
MrRightNow said:
Verbal abuse IS bullying and can have the same kinds of long term effects as physical bullying.
The best thing to do when you're being verbally harrassed it to try and ignore them, generally they'll get bored if you don't give them the reaction they're after. It's not the best idea in the world, but with bullies you never know what will work.
socratic said:
I know this wasn't directed at me but just thought I'd reply, hope you don't mind
I was verbally attacked for years, and recently physically attacked, phoned the police numerous times and nothing was ever done. In theory there are laws against bullying; physical and verbal, but in practice it rarely works that way.
Anonymous
Well-known member
GET EVEN BEFORE YOU END UP HATING YOURSELF FOR BEING A WUSS
The moment someone calls you a name, take my advice. Pick up the nearest two-by-four (nails optional) and beat the ever-loving shit out of them! I'm 40 now and there's not a day that passes when I don't feel humiliated and inferior for not standing up for myself, particularly in high school during formative years when we literally form opinions about ourself as much as about others.
My grandfather, I'm told (died before I was born) had this happen to him so he went to the local police chief and asked what a fine would be for beating the hell out of someone. When told, he paid the money in advance and politely walked to the bastard's house and "beat the hell out of him." He reportedly felt much better and had already paid the fine in advance so nothing happened. The bully who called him a slanderous name lost a tooth over it and realized he had done wrong and actually looked up to my grandfather for it.
Take my advice, folks: Find the balls within you and react appropriately. Don't get mad, GET EVEN! Anyone who advises you otherwise is delusional and probably can't relate because they're wealthy Republicans and have their asses kissed because their money intimidates regular folks.
My two cents
The moment someone calls you a name, take my advice. Pick up the nearest two-by-four (nails optional) and beat the ever-loving shit out of them! I'm 40 now and there's not a day that passes when I don't feel humiliated and inferior for not standing up for myself, particularly in high school during formative years when we literally form opinions about ourself as much as about others.
My grandfather, I'm told (died before I was born) had this happen to him so he went to the local police chief and asked what a fine would be for beating the hell out of someone. When told, he paid the money in advance and politely walked to the bastard's house and "beat the hell out of him." He reportedly felt much better and had already paid the fine in advance so nothing happened. The bully who called him a slanderous name lost a tooth over it and realized he had done wrong and actually looked up to my grandfather for it.
Take my advice, folks: Find the balls within you and react appropriately. Don't get mad, GET EVEN! Anyone who advises you otherwise is delusional and probably can't relate because they're wealthy Republicans and have their asses kissed because their money intimidates regular folks.
My two cents
Horatio
Well-known member
socratic said:
yes the laws in NZ are very similar to those in the UK and yes on several occasions I went to the police. However, due to the fact it was happening on school grounds meant that it was the school's legal responsibility to deal with the problem. Police will only come in if the school asks them to. The school did call the police once when people strarted bringing airguns to school to shoot me with, the school brought the police in and I understand they found three guns and were talking about laying firearms charges. I dont know if they ever did. However that was the only time the police were involved on school property.
on about three occasions myself/my parents went to the police regarding incidents that took place in public outside the school grounds, like the time I had a brick thrown at me when I was cycling home from school which knocked me off my bike. but because people were under 16 then they got nothing but a smack on the hand and a police warning that they might have to go to a youth anger management course on weekends
if you call the police to investigate anything that happens on school grounds involving other students then they will only go straight to the school authority and ask them to deal with it.
Horatio
Well-known member
jinxed said:
here you get sent to a juvenaile facility thingy if your young and rape someone or kill/nearly kill someone. certainly the guys that beat me up outside school grounds only got warnings
the guys who beat me up within the school grounds... they weren't disciplined at all. The police left it to the school and the school did nothing
jinxed said:
The principle behind legal age for imprisonment is not that children "can't be evil/bad" but that they are not usually deemed able to control their behaviour rationally enough for sanctions to be effective, which makes them useless and harmful. Punishment by the state is not a revenge of society, it is a method to discourage crime, and other than for that purpose it should not be used. Besides, bullying is very widespread among children and adolescents, if all those who do some bullying or illegal things where to be jailed, we would have a large chunk of the population behind bars.
When I was ten-eleven-twelve I used to steal from supermarkets with some schoolfriends. We knew it was illegal but we didn't mind, we just couldn't resist the thrill of it. I also was mildly bullied and did some mild bullying on others. I was stolen my money and I stole small sums of money from other children. I set fire to a can of trash. I wrote on the school walls and was caught. It's the way a lot of little guys behave at that age, I was surrounded by other kids doing that.
I am now since many years a quiet person, respectful of the law, concerned with public issues, and definitely not violent. Should I have been jailed as a kid? For being "bad" and "evil"? I don't think it would have been a great investment for society, my life would have been destroyed and I would now be a chronic criminal most likely.
PS Of course in Horatio's case it is different, that is severe abuse by people old enough to understand and control their actions, and they should have faced the consequences of their behaviour. In my country legal age for receiving any charge is 14 (also detention in a youth prison), and 18 for full responsibility. I wouldn't want to see that changed.
lily
Well-known member
Quixote said:
Yeh I understand that when you're very young, you do things which you didn't know better then, but I was talking of evil like in Horatio's situation, violence and hurtful, personal things, they could tell you that they're a child though if others have the urge in anger to get them back, they have an excuse too, and even a more worthy one, in which the other person you should not at all be sorry ! 'cauze it's a natural reaction and healthy to do sth about it and other times, they don't change later or at all even though there are exceptions such as minor bullying but nevertheless, if you get into trouble for anything you've done, even if it's not a very serious or deathly one, who do you have to blame except the one who provoked it.
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Kite_Zaroon
Member
In Australia if you're over 10 or 11 I can't remeber, think it was 10, you can go to juvy, I got in a fight with a friend last year and the 'principle' said if I repeated the offense I would be sent to juvy, in the last 3 weeks of the semester I got in 3 fights... no juvy, It wasn't a bully fight, one person was probly the most annoying person at school, evuantuly I couldn't control myself and kicked him in the stomach but missed and hit him in the croutch,
the other time was completely stupid
the other time was completely stupid