My Phobia

[Aggy]

Hi everyone, I'm new here. I only recently found out that I had social phobia, and I thought it was just nerves at first, but I done some research and have came to a personal conclusion that I definetely have it. I am studying Journalism at college, which I loved, until in November we had to prepare a small speech based opinion on a media issue, and when I got up infront of the class to do so, I froze. When I started speaking I couldn't control the volume of my voice and it went down in volume, my lip started trembling and my heart was beating at a speed I've never felt before. It was so painfully humiliating. I spent days thinking about it afterwards, people got over it in about 15 minutes, but I couldn't. I thought just keeping at these presentations would work, but whenever I'm faced with going up infront of the class my heart starts beating extremely fast and I get the same problems. I have no problem in normal social situations, I can go to partys etc, I can socialise, but this one aspect terrifies the life out of me. I won't even describe how I felt doing a class exercise infront of the camera (broadcast journalism), it was the above feelings x 10. Can anyone help me on getting help about this? I really want to conquer this fear.

 

[shynobody]

sorry...cant really help you but if it makes you feel any better...i dont think you really have social phobia. you may have some anxiety speaking (panic attacks?) in front of pple...but i think a lot of pple get that. the most popular guy in our class cracked at our graduation when he did a speech. and the fact that you go to parties...to me...make you non-SP. was that your first speech? that may have had a traumatic effect on you so future speeches may be affected. i'm sure other pple here can help you...altho...we're all going through the same and even worse things so idk. and welcome to the boards altho i dont think you really belong here lol .

 

[Aggy]

I don't think just because I go to parties rules out having social phobia :lol:

People vary in how often they experience anxiety in this way or in which kinds of situations. Anxiety about public speaking, performance, or interviews is common.

That's from the Wiki Page, there are many different forms. I believe I have one of them.

 

[Danfalc22]

I don't think just because I go to parties rules out having social phobia :lol:

People vary in how often they experience anxiety in this way or in which kinds of situations. Anxiety about public speaking, performance, or interviews is common.

That's from the Wiki Page, there are many different forms. I believe I have one of them.

Shynobody isnt trying to make you feel bad or say your moaning or say ya problem isnt bad.. it does sound more like general anxiety.. public speaking is a very common phobia on its own.social phobia can vary and there are different forms your right.. but people with full blown social phobia tend to find any social situation difficult... often even parents and close friends are hard to talk to.again im not saying this to nit pick or make you feel bad its just best you dont give yourself lables and ya best asking ya doctor.Tho.. with all the different types of social anxiety's... and well anxiety's full stop... the treatments are often simlar.. id look up c.b.t therapy or maybe look for self help books theres alot out there.I think they could help you

 

[Aggy]

I read about CBT therapy, I heard it was quite costly. I'm also a bit parannoid as how it'll look with an 18 year old getting therapy for making speeches :lol: I'll do my best to explain it, I find normal situations easy to talk in, but the minute I engage in a class discussion which is an on the spot talking exercise, the freezing happens and I begin to feel my heart going.

 

[Danfalc22]

Ah take it ya a states girl then if you have to pay for it im in the uk and ya get it free which is why i suggested it... tho it can take 2 years to get on a list :lol: i think your better off paying lol.Nah seriously id definatley advise a self help book then... would probaly suit you better because you can work at your own pace ect,I have one called "Overcoming Social Anxiety and Shyness" by Gillian Butler.. and you could probaly pick it up cheap on amazon,it covers all the cbt techniques and everything from full blown social anxiety.. to speaking anxiety shyness ect ect,so might be worth you looking that up to see if it suits you.

And im not a doctor but it really sounds like you have a specific phobia about talking infront of people... try checking this site out because i think theres quite a few posts which might help ya maybe or give you an idea of what to do more than i can.Hope it helps

http://www.ofear.com/viewtopic.php?f=5&t=1563

 

[Butterflies]

Hi Aggy - I agree with Shynobody - I don't think you have full Social Phobia. Because you do well in most other social situations. You could have performance anxiety. I have done CBT and yes it has helped alot.

What you could do (which is a low cost option) is join a group where you start by giving small talks of 5 mins and slowly build on your skills with a group of people who empathasie with anxiety in giving presentations. The idea is your exposure is gentle and you slowly develop your confidence in presenting. Start with an introduction, then 5 mins topic and so on.

If there isn't one in your area you could start one. I started my own group by running an add in the local paper. The group was a success and it helped me so much.

Your 18 years old so now is the time to get the skills - try not to worry about what others think. Who cares what they think - it's your life and future career your talking about. Do something now before this thing beats you.

 

[flake__]

Aggy, i think it would be better to say you have a fear of public speaking of any kind or 'stage fright'.

Essentially the thought processes are exactly the same as social phobia--worrying how others will see you and judge you.

I think most people on here have 'generalized social phobia' as in affects all/most aspects of their life. You could look at it as you having social phobia but not generalized, just one specific situation.

What is in a name?? A name is just a name. But i say you could look at it as being specific social phobia because the same techniques used to overcome SP could help you overcome your problem.

Also if the problem ran unattended it could go into other aspects of your life and then would become more SP.

I would say try a method, any method that appeals to you, to overcome this as it should be (relative to generalized SP) be easy to overcome. It might even be something you can practice your way out of ie take small steps, do enough times and you will realise the fear is irrational and it will go away. It might go away as you get older naturally, if you are willing to wait that long. Until then there's always people who will relate to your problem here, but there will be many issues here that you will not relate to at all.

Good luck!!

 

[Aggy]

Thanks for the help everyone I will let you know any progress I make, If I do.

 

[RedRibbons]

Things to maybe help you get over your fear of public speaking...

- Thoroughly prepare your speech
- Make cue cards
- Practice in front of the mirror to see the way you look when you talk(to get over any fear of looking like an idiot)
- Practice in front of friends and family
- Avoid psyching yourself out before the actual speech by telling yourself positive things (remembering how well you did in front of your friends/family, or reminding yourself that you are fully prepared)

And finally. LAUGH at yourself. Not necessarily outloud, but find humour in your little muck ups. It's all good, life goes on, it doesn't end the moment you say a word wrong. And usually if you giggle a little when you do mess up, it's kinda cute and I think people respond to that, and it makes them smile. It shows you are comfortable with yourself and confident.

One time I had to do a speech and I was freeeeeeeeaked out. So I didn't practice or put any attention into the fact that I had to do a speech. Then when I got up to do the speech I REALLY screwed up, REALLY BAD! lol.. I kept repeating myself and searching through my notes.. I mean, it was horrid. haha. So I screwed up in front of all these people, laughed about it, asked if I could redo. THEN! When I did the redo I prepared 110%. I got up there, and it was a breeze, I kept the listeners attention and I got a near perfect mark for the essay/speech.

So... Yea. I hope that helps. Good luck. ^^