My parents just don't understand

[Kathryn]

At this point in my life, I literally feel like I have nobody. My parents have been sending me to a psychologist lately, but I really feel like they still can't understand.
I was invited to go to the national honor society recently, and my mom has forced me to accept. Its a big deal to her because her whole family was involved in it. I told my parents that I didn't want to go, and that I'd be too scared to go to meetings. My parents flipped out, saying that I'd never make it in college, and that I might as well end up a drug addict and failure like my other two sisters.
I don't want to hurt them, but it seems like a big deal to them. It's already too late to decline my invitation to the society, because my mom already turned in the packet for me. I'll probably end up hiding and crying in the bathroom or something. I feel like such a failure in life, I know I'll never make it in the real world
I feel like no one really truly understands how badly I suffer; I go to school, try my best, get picked on by students and teachers, and I basically have no reason to go on living a wasteful life.

 

[saen]

Yeah, I'm also currently facing the prospect of going to university, and like you, I am currently seeing a psychologist. I think our main problem as Social-Anxiety sufferers is that we take other peoples opinions too seriously (at least in my case) which leads to a poor perception of self. I am trying to teach myself that peoples judgments are just that, judgments, and in the grand scheme of things, rude snide remarks are meaningless. But, accepting this is probably the hardest part. Just realize that your parent wont neglect you or leave you on the street. They are just uneducated about your situation. If you are willing, ask your psychologist to explain the issue to your parents. I did and it helped a great deal.

Keep your chin up.

 

[Kathryn]

Yeah, I'm also currently facing the prospect of going to university, and like you, I am currently seeing a psychologist. I think our main problem as Social-Anxiety sufferers is that we take other peoples opinions too seriously (at least in my case) which leads to a poor perception of self. I am trying to teach myself that peoples judgments are just that, judgments, and in the grand scheme of things, rude snide remarks are meaningless. But, accepting this is probably the hardest part. Just realize that your parent wont neglect you or leave you on the street. They are just uneducated about your situation. If you are willing, ask your psychologist to explain the issue to your parents. I did and it helped a great deal.

Keep your chin up.

Thanks, I never even considered that. I tend to overanalyze everything, and whenever anyone says something nasty, I automatically think it's directed at me. My parents are very frustrating to me, and I often ended up crying in front of them, because it's so hard to explain to them what I'm going through. My dad usually ends up saying something like, "all you have to do is talk to people, its not that hard, Kathryn!" this upsets me even more, because no matter how much I try to make them understand, they never will unless they go through it themselves...which I know they haven't

 

[RiiyaX]

[Gone for good.]

 

[Kathryn]

At one point in your life, you'd have to stand up to your parents and tell them you don't necessarily want what they want for you. Might as well do it now, since you're going to college and all.

I guess so....I'm very terrified of life and I wonder if my anxiety will change in college....it could possibly get worse

 

[saen]

Thanks, I never even considered that. I tend to overanalyze everything, and whenever anyone says something nasty, I automatically think it's directed at me. My parents are very frustrating to me, and I often ended up crying in front of them, because it's so hard to explain to them what I'm going through. My dad usually ends up saying something like, "all you have to do is talk to people, its not that hard, Kathryn!" this upsets me even more, because no matter how much I try to make them understand, they never will unless they go through it themselves...which I know they haven't

If you're up to it, seriously consider asking your psychologist to speak to your parents. My parents never fully understood why I had to quit half way through high school, but when my psychologist explained it to them, they became more tolerant of the fact that I couldn't go back. Your parents are only doing what they think is best for you at the moment. One thing I try to do is just think about how big the universe is and how trivial judgmental peoples comments are. It works for me.

Again, keep your chin up.

 

[thor01]

Tell your parents that you are an individual, and that theres more to life than going to university and "doing well" in life for some people. You should always aim for what you yourself want to do. All the people who pick on you are just on a lower vibration and dont think for themselves. They are the bad people, you havn't done anything wrong to them, there a complete waste. Its sad live is ruined by people like that. I know its hard to do especially with SA but when being verbally picked on, just remember these peoples minds are lower than yours and that it really doesnt matter what people think.