my latest problem

[bulldog21083]

Here's my situation: I'm a 28 year old guy, I've had one or two girlfriends in the past, but it never lasted more than a month. I also am still a virgin. But about a month and a half ago I met a girl and we have been going out ever since. I have social anxiety but I'm not shy around her at all now. I can't believe how great everything has been going, we are getting pretty serious.

Anyways, here's my problem. While I am still a virgin, we have done just about everything except that. So my problem is that since I was single for basically all my life I did a lot (daily) of masturbation. So now when she pleasures me I am unable to orgasm. I guess it's because when I did it to myself I always did it the same way, so now my body is used to it and any other variation doesn't feel as good.

So that's my problem, I can't orgasm when she pleasures me and it's starting to get embarrassing. She hasn't really said anything about it, but I she has to have noticed. And it also makes me paranoid that when we finally do have sex the same thing will happen.

Any advice on what I should do? Thank you.

 

[lettypagb]

I think is blowjob or hand stuff :lol:

but ,sometimes is just the girl ,dont worry ,sex is not really that good

 

[bulldog21083]

what do you mean "pleasures" you?

And how long does she try it for before she gives up?

If you actually had sex do you think you could get excited enough?

Why dont you tell her what you want?

1. hand jobs and oral
2. as much as 15-20 minutes
3. it's not that I'm not excited, trust me I am. arousal isn't the problem, it just doesn't feel as good as when I do it myself
4. how would I tell her?

 

[lettypagb]

tell her u dont like it ,kidding

i dunno :roll:

 

[JonnyD]

i'm hardly the guy to talk about but i can try,

i think you are in a situation different from most of us, for sample i fear that in my first time i will be too quick...

I dont think you're "used to yourself" in this matter, i belive that you just know yourself in this way very well and she doesn't ... yet

You could try telling her what how you like it, Either putting it straigth or just slowly give tips on how you like it, and i bet she would love you to do the same and discover how she likes to be touched... a month and a half is little time, i think you just need more time to discover each other, but a little help is always welcome

in the end it's all body language :roll:

-- or i may be totally wrong and talking bullshit because i'm more then virgin!

 

[dottie]

communicate with her during. tell her what feels good, tell her what doesn't. you can guide her hand. girls don't have penises so they don't know exactly what feels good, it's kind of a guessing game. DON'T tell her it's her fault or blame her. just try to guide her to do things that feel better, experiment with different techniques. also, you may just be shy. lots of people can't cum in front of other people because of mental block. like they are too hung up. it happens to the best of us. oh yeah and just because you don't cum doesn't mean she doesn't find it satisfying. hope this helps.

 

[Dave_McFadden]

Maybe you should just masturbate in front of her while she watches you. Tell her it turns you on or something. Hopefully she'll pay attention to the things you're doing so she can try to imitate them. Also, if you normally think about certain things when you masturbate, try to think about those same things when she's doing it to you.

If you feel stupid asking her to watch you jack off, then start with her first - tell her you want to watch her play with herself. Then it will naturally be your "turn" next, she might even suggest it. If she goes for that idea, take the opportunity to see what she does to please herself (pay attention to BOTH her hands even if only one is doing the "driving" so to speak)

Also, if it embarrasses you that you don't orgasm when she pleases you, you might want to let her know. This is an opportunity to do some of that "communication" that chicks like so much. And it will help her eventually feel more comfortable about having sex if she feels like the two of you can discuss stuff like that openly and honestly.